Is having a good physique necessary for men?

[InbetweenDreams]

I think it is somewhat natural to feel that way about wanting to get bigger muscles and working out. However, not everyone thinks muscular guys are attractive. Interests vary a lot. There's folks who like skinny guys, fat guys, hairy guys, tall guys, short guys...you get the idea.

Here's what I think. Working out, regardless if it is weight training or yoga, is good for your physical health but not always good for mental health. So if you're doing it strictly to look a certain way, well in my experience it won't work out when you don't get the attention you're seeking from other guys. Therefore, if you're going to work out, do it for your health and only because you want to look like all the other guys. Exercising can be a very good thing mentally. I remember getting done with a 5 mile run and feeling almost euphoric and generally in a better mood and destressed.

I got so hung up on trying to lose weight that when I didn't get the attention from guys online it kind of set me back. I suppose people can go one or two ways, either they take it to the extreme, thinking maybe they're still fat, don't look good enough and push harder, or they say fick it and give up. I don't think either of those are healthy choices, but someone who does it for the betterment of themselves is probably going to be successful. In 2015 I made a goal to do a triathlon (just a super sprint) and because that was the goal I made I kept with it and I did it. I didn't win anything but I did manage to lose some weight and I have flip flopped a few times, because I often do things for the wrong reasons. That and it's ok to fall of the horse, we are human, as long as you're willing to get back on.

As far as feeling insecure about your body, that's a tough thing to overcome, but it's your body. It's the most useful instrument you'll ever own and you should not feel ashamed of it or care about what other people think of it. Understand that we look at ourselves with a bias, so I imagine that you probably look better than you think. Guys who only like you because of your body probably aren't going to stick around for the long haul either.