Cheating??

[princealbertofb]

Quote:
Originally Posted by princealbertofb
"That's not quite what I said, Fred. I was saying: "Open the boundaries, don't restrict, give a man enough freedom and he will be in a place where he can commit willingly, not because forced to". It acts as a self guard of sorts, and makes a person define their own limits."

And what if the limits that he would like to define are much looser than I would like?
>>> Then you might have a problem unless you manage to adapt to those looser criteria / boundaries.

Quote:"
Originally Posted by princealbertofb
"It's also about not expecting of someone something that they are unable to give you."

So it's impossible for some men to resist having sex outside of relationships? Do they not have freewill? If they really are unable to control their urges then should they be allowed to do serious jobs, operate heavy machinery, etc?
>>> First of all, we are talking about sex here, aren't we? Not about operating machinery, which is probably a different kettle of fish. There is an amount of freewill, that's precisely what I was getting at. In any relationship, I'm guessing there is a certain amount of compromise too, but unless you both know how much the other is going to compromise, then there might be clashes, or we are just so compatible that we are lucky.
Yes, you are probably right that some men cannot resist having sex outside of their committed relationships (I mean married men, like partnered men). Therefore we are not talking about all men, and certainly not generalising. I don't know what proportion of men (or women for that matter) go with their urges to find other partners than the ones they are committed to, but we know it happens, don't we? I'm not breaking new grounds with this information, Fred.

Wanderers just don't want to control their urges. I'd agree that it is in practice foolish to expect them to be faithful, but I certainly don't give them any moral bye when they break promises of fidelity.

Sorry to be so blunt.

>>> It's ok to be blunt, but we seem to agree on the whole. I'm just saying that by not asking that type of person to make such promises of fidelity, you aren't going to end up disappointed one day. It's about trust, isn't it? I don't know if giving a person the right to use their body as they see fit is moral or not moral but I think it is reasonable enough. Again, there is the notion, at least amongst some gay couples, that being sexually active with other partners has nothing to do with infidelity in the couple... ie with emotional fidelity. Ultimately, no one owns any one else (except in such bondage as slavery, but that's illegal in our climes so...). Acknowledging that may be a way to find contentment.