Do you think my friend is GAY and INTO me? (why)

[BryanSlogan]

So I'm 17 and my friend is 16, we're both guys, go to same school, and swim for the same team year round. Were both tall and really athletic. I'm gay (I think), am in the closet, and am IN LOVE with this guy for a few months now and my feelings grown rapidly.
We sometimes hang out on the weekends (sometimes just us) and I'll sleepover his house or he at mine. We go to the movies and out to dinner and mall--often we do this alone, like sit by ourselves next to eachother at the movies but neither of us have really made a move yet. He's really cocky to me but can be really nice to me too (admires how insanely smart, hardworking, and fast I am), but he also makes fun of me and calls me gay A LOT cause he thinks it makes me stressed and finds that amusing. (I'm a really uptight person). But he reminds me he's joking when it gets to me.
He has said Im hot and told me he wants me in his ***hole, but brushes it off as a joke. He slaps my a** A LOT, and I know this is a straight guy joke, but im really the only person he does this to.
He does talk about girls often but never had a gf before. He stares at me A LOT and just laughs and smiles. He can be very touchy with me (even if its just touching me in a nonsexual way) and likes to 'fight' and argue with me. He likes to grab my feet when he swims behind me. He texts (at least once a day a convo) and calls me VERY often...sometimes we can talk on the phone for 45 min at a time about random ****. People have commented on how they love how we argue so much, have told us to stop flirting, and told him to stop hitting on me / trying to make out with me (all seemingly jokes?).
Do you think he's gay? Why or why not? What should I do to get with him?

[zeon]

hello,
I would say that his comfortable in his sexuality and think the chemistry is there that if u confideded in him it wouldnt change his views. If you came out to him he may admit himself to you and tell him if you choose to do so that he is still regarded as a good friend see where things go and you never know... Flirting is harmless and try little one liners like if he says again he wants u in his arsehole say with a dick this big mister ud split in half i would rather a man not a boy.. I often call my straight friends sweet cheeks like id say look ere sweet cheeks blah blah blah blah

[pellaz]

first off welcome to gayspeak

its a lot to ask a 16year old to process that they may indeed be gay. He may just not know, never considered the possibility. the gay population is about 3-8% do you think you two are included in this population group? For the same reasons your not out of the closet he might want to avoid the gay thing and be somewhat homophobic.

ask him if he has sex with a girl, if he had sex with a guy? How would he compare the two?


serious tho:
you have a good friend and why risk the friendship?

[looking4nsaf]

So I'm 17 and my friend is 16, we're both guys, go to same school, and swim for the same team year round. Were both tall and really athletic. I'm gay (I think), am in the closet, and am IN LOVE with this guy for a few months now and my feelings grown rapidly.
We sometimes hang out on the weekends (sometimes just us) and I'll sleepover his house or he at mine. We go to the movies and out to dinner and mall--often we do this alone, like sit by ourselves next to eachother at the movies but neither of us have really made a move yet. He's really cocky to me but can be really nice to me too (admires how insanely smart, hardworking, and fast I am), but he also makes fun of me and calls me gay A LOT cause he thinks it makes me stressed and finds that amusing. (I'm a really uptight person). But he reminds me he's joking when it gets to me.
He has said Im hot and told me he wants me in his ***hole, but brushes it off as a joke. He slaps my a** A LOT, and I know this is a straight guy joke, but im really the only person he does this to.
He does talk about girls often but never had a gf before. He stares at me A LOT and just laughs and smiles. He can be very touchy with me (even if its just touching me in a nonsexual way) and likes to 'fight' and argue with me. He likes to grab my feet when he swims behind me. He texts (at least once a day a convo) and calls me VERY often...sometimes we can talk on the phone for 45 min at a time about random ****. People have commented on how they love how we argue so much, have told us to stop flirting, and told him to stop hitting on me / trying to make out with me (all seemingly jokes?).
Do you think he's gay? Why or why not? What should I do to get with him?

you onlylive once tack the chance and just get naked in front of him when he stays over when u take a shower come out in just a towel and get dressed n front of him or start horse playing with him while u r just in the towel u never know maybe the best time you could ever have

[dfiant]

I don't know why you are putting pressure on yourself. It sounds rather romantic and as far as I am concerned romance has been undervalued in the recent past.

You are experiencing something so rare, so precious, so beautiful, why go and ruin that?

Trust me, you will regret ruining this romance with a relationship just now.

Enjoy it while you have it, treasure it now and for the rest of your life and just let time and nature take its course.

I'm so envious of you right now, I would give my right arm and left testicle to feel the romance you are feeling right now.


---
I am here:

[dfiant]

Sorry, have to be upfront. Disregard the poster above me. What he is suggesting for you is terrible terrible advice and should know better. Sex makes nothing better and it would ruin a friendship before it runs it course into whatever form the romance takes the 2 of you.

[Gizzie]

Maybe. But if he was, what do you want to do about it?
I think in a lot of ways, being close friends is like being in a relationship. Rather than risking losing the friendship with him, I would let the situation work itself out over time.
After all, it seems like he already knows your sexuality, right?

[Sylph]

So I'm 17 and my friend is 16, we're both guys, go to same school, and swim for the same team year round. Were both tall and really athletic. I'm gay (I think), am in the closet, and am IN LOVE with this guy for a few months now and my feelings grown rapidly.
Okay, So I can kinda relate, as I've only ever loved one boy and we grew up together from 4-14 and for as long as I can remember, I've always known I've liked other boys. So perhaps for you, you're just discovering this or maybe you're just curious or maybe you're just gay for him? Maybe only he attracts you?

We sometimes hang out on the weekends (sometimes just us) and I'll sleepover his house or he at mine. We go to the movies and out to dinner and mall--often we do this alone, like sit by ourselves next to eachother at the movies but neither of us have really made a move yet.
I've also done this, and let me tell you. No straight male sleeps over at another straight males house, unless they're having girls over or are really close friends, even then it's not that common. I've slept over at my friend's house(the boy I loved, still kinda do :/) and it usually lead to cuddling or spooning so... yeah. We went everywhere together as well, and I think it's not unusual for straight guys to hang out at malls and what not, but the movies seem kind of romantic and interpersonal. Dark room, close proximity, just you two, it's not like hanging out at the mall, because at the mall there are people around and you might see friends and talk to them, it's very "open".

He's really cocky to me but can be really nice to me too (admires how insanely smart, hardworking, and fast I am), but he also makes fun of me and calls me gay A LOT cause he thinks it makes me stressed and finds that amusing. (I'm a really uptight person). But he reminds me he's joking when it gets to me.
This to me sounds like he's coming on to you, because remember in kindergarden, boys would throw spitballs at girls or pull their hair to tell them they like them? That's what this seems like. Not that either of you are girls, but the same rule applies, I think. It could be as simple as what you say it is though, but it feels like he's coming on to you alittle bit. The making fun of you being gay thing, can also be a way for him to gauge you're reaction to see whether or not you're open to the idea or if it's off limits.

He has said Im hot and told me he wants me in his ***hole, but brushes it off as a joke. He slaps my a** A LOT, and I know this is a straight guy joke, but im really the only person he does this to.
He does talk about girls often but never had a gf before. He stares at me A LOT and just laughs and smiles. He can be very touchy with me (even if its just touching me in a nonsexual way) and likes to 'fight' and argue with me. He likes to grab my feet when he swims behind me.
He explicitly told you that? I think he may be expressing some sort of inner desire or is just testing you to see how you react. It is kinda normal I suppose for guys to slap each other's ass, but if you're the only one, this could be his way of saying "i'm curious about this part of you". His interest in girls is probably covering up for his attraction towards you, or he is straight but just curious. Or maybe you're the only guy he's shown an interest to, but is other wise straight. Again, the boy pulling the girls hair in class applies again, as he is staring at you could be his way of analyzing you and seeing if you two would be compatable, although you already seem to be. He could just be admiring you, as you pointed out before. Physical touching, whether it be sexual or not, is a clear form of intimacy, even on a systemic level. His touching you could be him trying to either get you familiar with him or him familiar with you. They also say that, touching(not always sexual), solidifies bonding.

He texts (at least once a day a convo) and calls me VERY often...sometimes we can talk on the phone for 45 min at a time about random ****. People have commented on how they love how we argue so much, have told us to stop flirting, and told him to stop hitting on me / trying to make out with me (all seemingly jokes?).
Do you think he's gay? Why or why not? What should I do to get with him?
[COLOR="magenta"]I used to text this boy from my class everyday after school, even though we talked all day at school, but he was straight. He was just genuinely interested in companionship and our personalities clicked and we got along, not unusual. In your case, it could be that he likes you, and it seems to me like he's the aggressor between you two, as he seems to be initiating all of this, so I'd think that on some level he finds you attractive or at least is curious about his and your sexualities. If it's appearant to others, even in joke form, you have to see that on some level, it's noticable, therefore it's there. They could be joking, but if it keeps coming up, I would suggest you take careful look at his and your relationship and try to see what they see. That will tell you what you want to know.
Ultimately, I can't definitively decide whether or not he's gay, but it sounds like he's curious or atleast is curious about you. Don't put all your eggs in one basket though, because he could turn out to be straight and that all this was just him sorting out his sexuality or settling his curiosity.[/COLOR]

Pretty Magenta writing for you :3.
Good luck, and take it slow, don't rush into anything .