Is my male student Gay or bi? [thanks]

[green]

Hi,

I feel like I'm quite disturbed lately. I'm gay in the sense that I also feel attracted to males, but I'm still in the closet since my friends never suspected me of being gay or whatsoever, and the fact that I am also an athlete.

My dilemma began when I started teaching as a part-time university professor. As a custom I always give out my Facebook account to my students so it would be easier for us to communicate rather than give out my personal mobile number. I have this male student who was like 2 years younger than me (I'm 21 and he's 19), who I admit happened to caught my attention because of the following things:

1. He loves to wear body tight and fit T-shirts that could reveal his navel at some angles. He also wear tight jeans and leather shoes with no socks.
2. He was one of the first who added my Facebook account and even to the point of asking my mobile number from me.
3. He would always "like" all my status updates in Facebook and even "like" pictures I posted in Facebook.
4. Everytime I'm online, he would chat with me, telling me stuffs he did in school or on their thesis. Even telling me that he got wet in the rain the other day because of a school project.
5. Whenever we are in school, he seldom talks to me except if I approach him or ask him random stuffs.
6. I would sometimes catch him looking at me, then he would smile whenever he noticed me looking at him too.
7. He keeps insisting that we go out on a summer vacation probably in a beach along with his other friends.

Well I made some research on his facebook account to see whether he is gay or not but then I found out the following signs that he might/ might not be gay:
1. His favorite songs include Mariah Carey, Beyonce, Rihanna, Lady Gaga to name a few.
2. He likes Mario Maurer
3. He has pictures wherein a gay classmate of his was hugging him
4. He plays Basketball
5. He has a lot of Female friends on Facebook
6. In school, he hangs around with males too
7. I never saw or heard that he had a girlfriend.

So Everything I found out made it more complicated as to what his real motive is, whether he is gay and having a crush on me or not? Please help. Thank you!

[Prometheus]

Ehhh, I cannot condone a student/teacher relationship no matter the age differential. If I was that kid, I'd be bumping up on my teacher to make sure I get that 'A' in the class. But he sounds pretty gay, if you ask me. And he wants to hang? Cool. Wait till the semester is over and ask him out, yeah?

[Rainbowmum]

I have to agree with Prometheus 100%.
I cannot condone either , on your part alone it's a breech of trust.

[gilhooly]

Two guys your age sound perfect together. Look the guy directly in the eye and inform him that he will receive no special consideration from you for grades or anything else. If he likes you personally, he will accept without reservation. If he wants something special, he will give you the finger and tell you to get lost. Either way you are ahead. He may be the guy you want to spend the rest of your life with. If he is a scumbag amd is planning to use you, you might as well find out now.

A guy should always take a chance when he is trying to figure out his life, sexuality or friendship. You owe first consideration to yourself. If you show me that, I will give you the consideration you deserve. Make sure he is worthy of any special help you might give.

Definite yeses and noes never work to anyone's advantage.

[pellaz]

please disregard the uppercase, not yelling at you, trying to differenciate my response form yours.

Hi,

I feel like I'm quite disturbed lately. I'm gay in the sense that I also feel attracted to males, but I'm still in the closet since my friends never suspected me of being gay or whatsoever, and the fact that I am also an athlete.
FIGURE OUT IF YOU ARE INDEED GAY. TO BE GAY YOU NEED TO BE SUCCESSFUL IN A GAY RELATIONSHIP, BE ABE TO RESPECT, COMMUNICATE, TRUST AND DO THE SEX; THUS APPRECIATE THE TASTE OF YOUR PARTNERS CUM AND WANT HIM INSIDE YOU. SHORT VERSION

My dilemma began
VERY WELL CONSTRUCTED POST. SKIP THIS STUDENT UNTIL HE IS PAST YOUR COURSE. LAST DAY OF LECTURE TELL HIM YOU WANT A "DATE"


when I started teaching as a part-time university professor. As a custom I always give out my Facebook account to my students so it would be easier for us to communicate rather than give out my personal mobile number.
YOU SHOULD SAY YOUR GAY IN YOUR FB ACCOUNT AND YOUR PROFESSIONAL ORIENTATED.
I have this male student who was like 2 years younger than me (I'm 21 and he's 19), who I admit happened to caught my attention because of the following things:
ONLY 2 YEARS NOT BAD

1. He loves to wear body tight and fit T-shirts that could reveal his navel at some angles. He also wear tight jeans and leather shoes with no socks.
BAD
2. He was one of the first who added my Facebook account and even to the point of asking my mobile number from me.
GOOD
3. He would always "like" all my status updates in Facebook and even "like" pictures I posted in Facebook.
GOOD, HOW ARE HIS GRADES
4. Everytime I'm online, he would chat with me, telling me stuffs he did in school or on their thesis. Even telling me that he got wet in the rain the other day because of a school project.
5. Whenever we are in school, he seldom talks to me except if I approach him or ask him random stuffs.
VERY GOOD
6. I would sometimes catch him looking at me, then he would smile whenever he noticed me looking at him too.
VERY GOOD
7. He keeps insisting that we go out on a summer vacation probably in a beach along with his other friends.
BAD, JUST A DATE, START SLOOOW

Well I made some research on his facebook account to see whether he is gay or not but then I found out the following signs that he might/ might not be gay:
1. His favorite songs include Mariah Carey, Beyonce, Rihanna, Lady Gaga to name a few.
SUX IN MUSIC, MOVE ON FROM THIS...
2. He likes Mario Maurer
3. He has pictures wherein a gay classmate of his was hugging him
4. He plays Basketball
YOUR OPINIONS PROJECTED ONTO HIM
5. He has a lot of Female friends on Facebook
6. In school, he hangs around with males too
SAME AS YOU BOO
7. I never saw or heard that he had a girlfriend.
VERY GOOD
So Everything I found out made it more complicated as to what his real motive is, whether he is gay and having a crush on me or not? Please help. Thank you!
HOW IS HIS COLLEGE SKILLZ?

IT WOULD ALL HAVE BEEN EASIER IF YOU SAID YOU WERE GAY/ BI UP FRONT. YOUR OBVIOUSLY SELF SUPPORTING SO YOU SHOULD BE OUT. (ONLY MY OPINION)


do you really need the boy. In that case wait till he is done with our class and see if he will still see you. If not you have mis judged the situation. you really need to put your professional considerations up front next time, like are you really that desperate jock boy.

[DerJack]

Your male student, as far as you should be concerned, is out of bounds until your class has come to a conclusion. After that, simply ask him if he wants to go get coffee with you or go to a movie or something... if he's not interested, he'll probably say no... and there you go....

[dfiant]

I agree. Student + person of authority = inappropriate and potential jail bait. Don't go there and don't form relationships with students on Facebook unless it is a page specific for work.

Your person Facebook is for your friends, students are not your friends.

[MindsMight]

Yup, totally homosexual (I hate stereotypes but this is too perfect).Not only is this a bad idea because of the obvious power roles, but you could very easily be fired and then later blacklisted by the academic community(assuming that your future career will be in academia).

[East]

I agree with most everyone who has told you it is a bad idea. You are in a position of authority and it is not really a gay/straight thing...it is about ethics.

Forget about his intentions or if he is gay or interested in you and pull yourself back and remember you are the teacher and he is the student. If you want to explore something further wait until you are not his teacher.

[green]

Ehhh, I cannot condone a student/teacher relationship no matter the age differential. If I was that kid, I'd be bumping up on my teacher to make sure I get that 'A' in the class. But he sounds pretty gay, if you ask me. And he wants to hang? Cool. Wait till the semester is over and ask him out, yeah?

Yeah, thank you prometheus I will surely wait till the semester is over.. I know this is also a stand about ethics on the teacher/student thing. :redface: