Questions

[cyoung112]

Hello everyone,

I thought I posted this the other day, but I can't find it on here and when I pressed the submit button, it told me that it had to be approved. If this comes up again, I do apologize.

Anyway, I have realized my attraction to guys for a while now an I'm okay with it. I have never been in a romantic relationship with a man, but I'm very interested in it. If I were to find someone, I'm sure the topic of sex would come up. While I realize that I can be turned on by guys (looks, voice, lips, legs, guys in underwear, etc) the idea of anal sex doesn't turn me on. In fact I'm somewhat bothered by it. I realize that some people are happy with it an I respect that, but I'm very worried about. It makes me wonder if this were to be a big issue in a relationship. It makes me wonder if I would be able to get/keep someone. As funny as these questions may sound, I'm going to ask anyway: Is the whole bottom/top the only way? is it the norm? Do you think I will have trouble finding someone because I don't want to have anal intercourse? Please share your thoughts. Thanks guys!

[pellaz]

... Is the whole bottom/top the only way? is it the norm? Do you think I will have trouble finding someone because I don't want to have anal intercourse? ...

no / yes / yes

i think you will find someone you love and want to share your bodies

[James]

Other than the gay bath scene, not all gays are looking for sex right off the bat, some are looking for friendship and compatablity, someone they click with, exploration of boundaries and pleasure's of each partener come later down the road as the relationship becomes closer, finding what your partner likes is an exploratory adventure, takes time and commitment, James

[Dylannihilation]

Actually, quite a few gay couples DON'T engage in penetrative sex! Some just have oral, others just have mutual masturbation. It's not weird at all to not want to do it. And, if a guy really cares that much, it's obvious he was only in the relationship for one thing...

I wish you all the luck in the world!

[cyoung112]

Yes, Pellaz

I would hope that would be the case. I know how I would feel about being close to people I already like. So, I imagine the natural desire to share our bodies would come up. I just don't have the desire for anal sex and thought maybe there are other people who might feel the same way and might do other things.

[azulai]

It makes me wonder if this were to be a big issue in a relationship. It makes me wonder if I would be able to get/keep someone. As funny as these questions may sound, I'm going to ask anyway: Is the whole bottom/top the only way? is it the norm? Do you think I will have trouble finding someone because I don't want to have anal intercourse? Please share your thoughts. Thanks guys!

Bottom/top/versatile isn't the only way, neither is oral.
Maybe read up on
>intercrural sex
>hotdogging :biggrin: or intergluteal sex, and
>sword fighting, :tongue: frot, frictation or frottage.

Personally, I think you have to be upfront about it. I think there is a general assumption of anal but never let anyone pressure you into doing something with which you are not comfortable. Having said that, a relationship may change how you feel about anal. Developing feelings for someone may make you want to experiment a little.

Intimacy is vital to a relationship; how you choose to express intimacy is between you and your partner. Just remember even though you may not engage in penetrative sex, any genital contact has a risk of STIs, so play safe.

I wish you a happy, healthy and fun sex life!

[zeon]

Hello,
Just because two people dont take shopping in the back door doesnt mean they cant sit down and have dinner...... You can still have a succcessful relationship regardless whether ur a front door person or a back door person anal isnt that exciting anyhow =)

[pellaz]

there is not that much difference between Vaginal sex and anal. From a clinical point of view. You can express your internal hate that somehow gay men are dirty. Inside some ones mind things can be a world apart but its only one person.

Gay men are part of the circle of things, all this is very old and humans are put together the way we are.

I think the original OP is limiting him self but his choice. In a relationship the sex is the easy part.

[WheresTheLove]

Before I came to terms with being gay, I was attracted to guys but thought anal sex was gross.
A year or two later though I found myself wanting it
So your thoughts may change.

[archubbycub]

This is something I've been thinking a lot about since coming to terms with my sexuality. Since I've never experienced sex with a man, I really don't have anything to base an opinion on, but I know one of the first things that "catches my eye" when I look at a guy I find attractive is his butt.