After reassessing my sexuality I have come to the conclusion that I am, indeed, gay. I still don't want to use the label Lesbian, but I think that's pretty much who and what I am at this point. I have mixed feelings about it. My life is already complicated with my mental illnesses, now this. That's a really negative way to look at it. Sorry about that, but I'm still coming to accept myself. I just hope I meet a really great girl sometime in my life.
I want to come out on Facebook, but I'm not sure if its anyone's business really. I don't care if some of my friends know, the ones that really matter are already aware. I just don't want to hide myself, but I don't want to broadcast myself either. So I'm sitting on the fence while I debate to what benefit I would have if I came out on Facebook.
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Some of my female friends at school don't identify with the word lesbian either. One prefers gay woman, she says it sounds softer and one self-identifies as queer.
I found it difficult to identify with the word gay when I was accepting myself. But as time progressed and meeting people I grew more comfortable. Don't call me fag or queer, though. :tongue: I still have issues. :biggrin:
I thought it was interesting when talking to my female friends that they had a similar discomfort with the word lesbian as I had with gay. I think it's difficult to embrace words that we feel imply something about us rather than letting who we are speak for itself.
I understand the need to identify but I really agree with dfiant. Don't put so much emphasis on a label, as what's in your heart and letting people see the person you are.
The best advice someone on here gave me about coming out was to slow down. I don't make rash decisions, and my need to rip the band-aid off was so counter to my behavior it would have been a mistake and I don't think as positive as it's been if I would have just rushed.
So how do you generally make decisions? I would fall back on your past behavior, and assess things from there. There is a feeling of exposure after, how do you handle such situations? Do you consider yourself an open book and it would help you emotionally to have everyone know?
Just reading your posts you have a lot you are dealing with at the moment. I'm not saying "don't come out on Facebook" but rather be aware of your emotional limits as you make your decision.
There is nothing wrong with small steps and a slow forward progression, especially if it gives you time to get your emotional balance back.
If the people who matter are aware, then you are doing great. Enjoy their support.
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I've always dreamt of having a big coming out exposé on facebook with, "I'M GAY. MOVING ON TO NEXT TOPIC." to put to rest all of those irritating people who keep asking me and judging me.
But I can't. My bf's family is kind of very religious and we sort of have to live in a very tight-knit community where gossip is faster than hourly news broadcasts on the telly, or even twitter.
It's a compromise that I'm willing to have for the sake of my relationship.
So I think ultimately it'll affect a lot of our life decisions if we come out, especially on Facebook. Well it really depends on where you live and who you'll have to live with.
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well if you decide to maybe drop a joke about it into convo to give someone a hint ask them what a lesbian dinosaur is.... Answer : Liccalottapus... And for the gays in this situation ask what a gay dinosaur is... Answer : Megasoreass (megasaurus)
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foprgot to put the serious bit lol...
Dont feel you need to label yourself either me lovely because at the end of the day... We all are unique and the only thing labels belong to is tins...
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Hello...and welcome!
I'm Gay but stuck up in a straight married relationship. Desperately looking out for a soul who could better understand me....
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Hi Maha, there are many of us here who are or have tried to play straight and, gotten married, even had kids. And I think those that haven't understand the reasons those that have did or are doing that.
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I don't like the word "lesbian" either. I never have. It sounds so... rough, barbarian, brutish. I much prefer "gay woman" to that. I think it's because I have never liked applying that "lesbian" label to women I have admired. It sounds so... negative to me.
But hey, what do I know?
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Coming Out, Again
