I have been long puzzled about how to identify a gay man from his appearance or behaviour,etc......Is there any way to make it before direclty asking him? (or more luckily, he directly tells you.):confused:
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cross the eye contact , if he smiles he is gay. worked for me
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For most people, no there is no real easy way to tell if a person is gay, bi, straight, catholic, Baptist, whatever.
When it comes to sexuality watch their eyes. Gay men tend to let their gaze linger longer on males than females. Straight men tend to let their gaze linger longer on females over males. Bi-sexuals tend to spend time 'appreciating the view' with both genders. Of course this only works on the ones who are interested in 'dating' or are sexually active. There are 'prudes' who totally refuse to stare (let their gaze linger) on either gender, or who are absorbed in other things to actually pay attention to the hot tight butt of whomever just walked by.
There are no set of behaviors or fashions worn that really separate people based on sexual orientation, unless they are wearing something obvious as a rainbow. Lord knows the gays have tried through the decades, but nearly every fashion statement gays adopted to help in the identifying process of other gays straights adopted. Be it the pocket square (adopted in the middle late 1800's by gays that turned into a solid, must have for any well dressed man by the 1920's) to the pierced ear. All of these fashion statements have been stolen by straight men.
I have an advanced perception ability, I trained starting at a very young age, it was necessary to be able to gauge wen the next fist was going to fly so I could duck or prevent serious damage. As a side effect to being always hyper-aware (for self defensive purposes) I learned behaviors and to closely observe what people are looking at, their body language and the like.
Good news everyone, you do not need to train your perceptions via an abusive childhood. One can simply do it by 'people watching'. In the old days when the Shopping Malls were the popular place for people to socialize, one could sit in one place for hours observing people, watching them and learning a lot about 'tells' and how their body language operates before they do an action.
The whole 'gaydar' thing is basically people absorbing and acknowledging some of the vast data that they collect all the time. Most sensory data we collect we 'ignore'. For instance until I mentioned it, you were not aware of the press of your clothing against your skin. You ignored it until it was brought to your attention.
We ignore a lot of data when it comes to people. Gays can pick out other gays because of experience of being around other gays and unconsciously picking up and on dozens of tiny clues, from where a person looks (or at whom) to how they hold their body around different people.
With all of that said, if you are interested in a person the best and perhaps the only way to figure it all out is just to ask. Trust me, you can be a game player and pin your hopes to the point where you will see gay where there is none. It just saves a lot of time and hassle to pull the person aside and ask if they are 'family' or right out if they are gay.
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I personally can tell if someone is gay by the gut instinct its a case of monitoring their behaviour really but my experience being in a gay capital can also cause mis judgement in a rurual areas
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