How would you feel??? Just a question

[zeon]

Hello All,
I am a member of gaydar i openly admit and a couple of nights ago i was on there chilling and chatting with other guys in my area when someone i was talking to messaged me after i signed off... Not thinking much i responded as he sounded a decent person by his post and after another day i noticed in his photos something i thought might be a trick of the camera so i asked him out right in a non offensive way if he has a disability or if it is the camera and he admitted to me his hand begins at his elbow on his left arm... Looking at his age i worked out he was born in the late 1970's when all the medical problems with sickness pills for women came around harming babies leaving many born deformed... Now today ive been thinking about the conversations we had last night and his title on his profile read "Being single can be very lonley at times".. I felt really sad inside for him because i thought to myself, His probably going out and gets loads of people start judging him without actual;ly getting to know him where as me I dont care if his got no arms and have to type his words by head butting the keyboard..
I find a lot in life people seem to judge people by the way they look when infact to be honest when you make a friend or a relationship your not with the person because of the outside your with them because of the inside... Its the inside that makes ya click as a friendship as lets face it not everyone can get on with everyone in life but we can give it a damn good go... So what would u feel if you made a friend with a deformity or even a partner with one?? Me personally... I cannot wait to meet him for a drink in town later on in the week because i love making new friends and meeting new people and find his personality quite nice and feel i can click well with him...

Kindest regards

Aunty Zeon xx

[chillythoughts]

it doesnt matter if they are missing arms, missing legs, missing anything, aslong as they are respectful and nice, thats all that matters to me.

[matty7]

i can say as a friend it would make absoulutly no difference at all . as a partner i can say i dont know - basically because ive never met anyone with a disability who is gay anyway so it wud be hard to answer -

i whent to see Frankie boyle the comedian and the first act on was tanyalee davis (she describes herself as a midget) and she was a brilliant act she talked about her break up of her 13 year old marriage to a 6 foot guy and !! within one minute of her talkin i didnt see a disability at all ,,just saw a very fun person... im sure many many others saw her as a great girlfriend too if she was that way inclined,

[Spades]

I have a friend with the same birth defect, and it doesn't bother me at all! In fact, he is an inspiration, seeing what he can do with (no pun intended!) the hand he was dealt. He has found a way of becoming an excellent computer programmer and I think his one handed typing skills is fster than mine with both hands.

But I have been discriminated against for my disabilities

[matty7]

call me rude but what are your disabilities Spades ? and what happend when u got discriminated against ? sorry for been nosey

[mrk2010]

If it was any other disability I would not be bothered but I have a phobia of people with bits missing like amputees, people with little arms, legs the lot. It's not a prejudice thing it actually makes me feel physically sick. One day I saw a guy with no legs and was walking on those blade things and I was dry heaving, I dnt know why but I just think of the stumps chafing or the fact that there should be something there and it's not. I just dnt like it, I'm not sure if there is a term for such a weird phobia. But ideally it shouldn't matter.

[Rainbowmum]

Hi Aunty,
I agree with you , what's on the inside is all that matters.

My Terry was born partially deaf , has a clubfoot and one hand is extremely damaged from Amniotic banding.

It has never bothered me ,I still think he is the sexiest man in the world.

[Spades]

call me rude but what are your disabilities Spades ? and what happend when u got discriminated against ? sorry for been nosey

I don't think you are rude but if you insist...

I'm in a wheelchair and not always treated with equality, often being talked down to.

[matty7]

I don't think you are rude but if you insist...

I'm in a wheelchair and not always treated with equality, often being talked down to.

Do u ever get revenge on the ignorant people by running over there feet !! man i wud cause some broken bones or maybe i'd go for the ben hur approach with the blades on the wheeels m8 - guaranteed to be talked to in an equal manner then..

seriously though - do you think they know they are doing it ?? or are they just dumb

[ChadCoxRox]

I don't think you are rude but if you insist...

I'm in a wheelchair and not always treated with equality, often being talked down to.

I have a friend whose wheelchair has some KINKY attachments!!! NO LIE! And he has the very best and humorous attitude about it!

People are generally uneducated about persons living with observable disabling conditions. I remember I walked up to this friend referenced above and I grabbed the weld modification on his chair for his attachments and he gave me the meanest look. Of course I didn't even pick up on what his problem was until we became friends enough that he explained that one should not just touch a person's wheelchair or other technology without permission just like you wouldn't touch anyone else's body without permission. Of course I came back with "consider it a rude molestation" and we've been tight ever since.