Are some people just naturally tighter/looser than others down there?

[Teox]

Sorry if this sounds like a stupid question but I generally like to know.

I'm a top and I've never been bottom, I'm happy being a total top but I would like to try being bottom even just the once.

I'm just too tight, I can't even hardly get a finger inside me with lube and poppers.

I realy want to experience being bottom, it's like I'm missing out in life as a gay guy.

I've tried lots of things, relax, plenty of lube, poppers, got myself a butt plug.

I wish there is a tablet I can take so I can experience being a bottom.

Are some people just naturally tighter/looser than others down there and any other advice for me?

[JBeg29]

Something simple and easy massage your anus and use a little veggie oil and slowly insert your finger

[Teox]

Something simple and easy massage your anus and use a little veggie oil and slowly insert your finger

I've tried that, by myself and a partner that I trust.

[ToddYoung]

Yeah, I have this problem. And a doctor recently told me I had a tight prostate. I'm a top, but I have bottomed quite a few times now. I used to worry about it when I was younger. I thought a guy would want to top for me, and like you, I knew it wouldn't work.

Well, it finally did, and I've done it a few times since, though it's always been uncomfortable. I don't know if there's much you can do about it, but I use something beforehand now. Take a lot of time to loosen myself up first.

But I really don't like it anyway, so I suppose I'm lucky. I'd much rather be on top.

[Blue]

A few things can help you relax more. First cum right before you try, second lots of lube and a very think object such as urethral sounds. Move it in a small circle until it feels comfortable, then get something a bit bigger, keep at it until you get a finger in comfortably every day for a week, then go for two fingers, then three and on to your plug.

You're training those muscles to relax and not clamp down when something is in there and, it takes longer, and smaller starts for some than others. If you never get there, don't sweat it, not everyone even likes anal and, being gay certainly doesn't mean you have to like or even do anal.

[Teox]

A few things can help you relax more. First cum right before you try, second lots of lube and a very think object such as urethral sounds. Move it in a small circle until it feels comfortable, then get something a bit bigger, keep at it until you get a finger in comfortably every day for a week, then go for two fingers, then three and on to your plug.

You're training those muscles to relax and not clamp down when something is in there and, it takes longer, and smaller starts for some than others. If you never get there, don't sweat it, not everyone even likes anal and, being gay certainly doesn't mean you have to like or even do anal.

Thanks Blue for your advice but you still have not answered my question. Are some people just naturally tighter/looser than others down there? then?

I have tried all what you said.

[Zet]

I think its all about experience. I mean don't forget that the Sphincter is just another muscle. Just as any muscle it will hurt a lot to exercise if you haven't done it before or in a long period of time. The more you train the better it will feel I think I don't think that there is anyone that is naturally looser down there, I think that those who are looser have perhaps loads of experience of it

[Teox]

Ok thanks Zet, I quess I'll just have to accept that I will never be bottom and satisfy my partner

[BobInTampa]

There's no such thing as a "tight prostate" your physician was misinforming you. The prostate gland is 5" inside your rectum, not anywhere near the sphinter.

[BobInTampa]

To answer your question directly: NO!

The sphinter is a strong muscle - and can be "flexed".....so, the reality is, you're apprehensive about anal sex being painful and so you're "clinching" your sphinter muscle which makes it almost impossible to get even a pinky in your rectum.

Once you find a guy or situation where you feel 100% safe and with a partner who's very patient, you'll be able to enjoy anal fun. But, until you learn to fully relax, and a guy will take the time (and lots of lube) and you TRUELY want to bottom, it will be tough and even painful.