problem with my best friends

[reverbs33]

Well guys thanks a lot for your advice, it was really great to hear from all of you. Just last night I told my friend about everything and how I am feeling. He understood and everything but then he started saying some mean stuff to me, about why does it matter to me at all? He always sided with her even when he knew she was wrong about stuff regarding my actions, behaviour, etc. Then he finally admitted that he always felt threatened by my presence with her because I'm "competition", and everything seemed to kind of imply that he liked the fact that she started being closer to him instead of me, even though it was the other way around before. He isn't talking to me now and I'm even more heartbroken than ever, she hasnt come back home from being away yet and I shudder to think about what that would be like.

He said he chooses me, but that he needs to go away on weekends now, and spend time at the library, make new friends, so as to get over her. He even got upset at the mention of me saying that they could be together. When i suggested i find someone for him, he replied, "but none would be like her". I'm confused as to what he wants. In a way he's not really choosing me if he keeps saying he needs to move on from us, he's only being more "forthright" with me. They don't know yet that they bothe kinda feel the same for each other as haven't disclosed that yet.

Thanks again and any help and advice is appreciated.

[Corsac]

Does your friend know that you're gay? And are you sure that your feelings aren't on more then just a friend level?

To be honest it sounds like its too much of a complicated matter for it to just be about friendship. No one should ever be made to choose between one or the other, it just sounds like there has been no option of a "happy medium" where he could hang out with both you and her. To be honest it really sounds like you've stuck your friend into a tight position because of how you felt. Some people naturally drift apart but it doesnt mean that they drift that far that they don't hang out/talk to you anymore.

[LateBloomer]

Well guys thanks a lot for your advice, it was really great to hear from all of you. Just last night I told my friend about everything and how I am feeling. He understood and everything but then he started saying some mean stuff to me, about why does it matter to me at all? He always sided with her even when he knew she was wrong about stuff regarding my actions, behaviour, etc. Then he finally admitted that he always felt threatened by my presence with her because I'm "competition", and everything seemed to kind of imply that he liked the fact that she started being closer to him instead of me, even though it was the other way around before. He isn't talking to me now and I'm even more heartbroken than ever, she hasnt come back home from being away yet and I shudder to think about what that would be like.

He said he chooses me, but that he needs to go away on weekends now, and spend time at the library, make new friends, so as to get over her. He even got upset at the mention of me saying that they could be together. When i suggested i find someone for him, he replied, "but none would be like her". I'm confused as to what he wants. In a way he's not really choosing me if he keeps saying he needs to move on from us, he's only being more "forthright" with me. They don't know yet that they bothe kinda feel the same for each other as haven't disclosed that yet.

Thanks again and any help and advice is appreciated.

Ok, LISTEN UP!

At the risk of over-simplifying your situation I'm going to offer you the following:

There are 2 kinds of people in this world. Givers and Takers.

Givers are Saints; they're part of your TEAM; they ENHANCE your life; they make you a BETTER person; they make you feel GOOD.

Takers are VAMPIRES; they sabotage you; they don't add anything beneficial to your life; they make you miserable and prey on your insecurities for their own selfish and personal gain.

At your age, you need to make deliberate choices about who you choose to spend your valuable time with. Some people are not worth it. Avoid vampires.

Good luck.