joseph Wrote:hello i am called joe aswel well joseph.im am same age.i am disabled aswel. so i know it hard. i never hd a boyfrined but i wont one. if your disabled pepl think you not care about sex they are wrong . and disabled pepple acan be gay aswel . your now whst is is i go to gay pubs and dancing and the disco with disabled pepole .i am looking for a boyfried.!! one day! i think a gay disabled man for a boyfrind for me.good luck and find a nice boyfrined.. josephxxx
Thanks, especially for your message to the other Joseph (Tyrion), Joseph... You manage to uplift everyone's spirits. 
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gavjg Wrote:Myself I am 43 and have never had a boyfriend and I am not in a wheelchair, So I wouldn't worry as you are not the only one who hasn't been on a date as such.
Look at it this way, Someone might see that as a positive for us because we have been saving ourselves for the right person to come along.
Just hang in there and please keep posting on this site as it will give you so much more confidence.
I wish you all the very best.
good luck to you too, Gavin.
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bhrc Wrote:I met my guy on a dating site, so I'm very pro-online dating 
I was pretty much on a mass profile-deleting spree when he messaged me as I'd had quite a number of frogs (and whatever's worse that frogs...). He started out stating that he was looking to be friends, and I put him through the wringer badly at the beginning. Eventually he came around and told me about his disabilities, and I did have a long hard thought about dating someone who was not able-bodied like me. Was I against it? Absolutely not, but I think I may have thought it would only ever happen in TV land or something. I took a chance and jumped head first into it when we met finally (he was a couple cities away and neither of us drove/drive so it was like we were worlds apart), and two years and some change later we are engaged.
He's told me so many stories about how it was like for him growing up and coming to terms with having disabilities since birth, and how it was coming to terms with being gay on top of that. He had come out ages before me and didn't think that a relationship was possible for him. Then he himself had some frogs... and had friends that pushed him back out into the dating pool.
I guess I am really just trying to say that it WILL happen if you keep plugging away. My best luck was when I was starting looking for friends first. I wouldn't even exchange numbers or messenger handles until I got to know them through loads of emails first. In a way I feel it's more romantic that way anyways
Keep us up to date on how it goes!
Thanks, bhrc, for this very uplifting story. You are bodily proof that things like this do happen. (btw, worse than frogs is TOADS! - I should know, I AM a Frog)...
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Nick9 Wrote:I wouldn't care at all if you are in a wheelchair now. Unlike PA I do believe in Prince Charming But it never came to my mind that there is a special rule - he must be able to walk. I know that there may be many other problems too, but I would be interested in other things (are you a nice person? Do I feel good with you? Are you a jerk?). Because, I can be sitting in that chair tomorrow. Or someone from my friends, and I wouldn't dump them just because of that.
I second that.
I don't have a problem to have a disabled man as a boyfriend.
I still remember this one guy in a wheelchair who took my breath away. It was on 2008.
Don't stress yourself in finding a guy. There are plenty of fish in the sea. You'll bound to find Mr Right. Love happens when you least expect it.
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princealbertofb Wrote:Tyrion, you mention being quite outgoing, but are you out? Do people know that you are gay and looking?
I'm not sure that moving to a bigger city will be the answer to your quest. Of course the sheer numbers point towards it being easier to find a date, but then again, sometimes the pearl lies within reach, it's just a question of finding it. No one knows where it'll be found (or else we'd all be happily married, lol). Keep your options open, and make it known, to your straight and gay friends, that you are looking for a relationship. Straight friends who are open- minded will often know some other gay friends whom they'd be glad for you to meet. The gay scene is not geared so much toward the long lasting relationship, even though, again, this might be precisely where you'll find one. You never know. Is there a gay support group within easy reach that you could belong to? There again, it's a question of being in the right place at the right time.
Good luck in your search, Tyrion.
Thanks for your response ;p
I am not really out, but I think that's mainly because I've felt a bit hopeless about the whole thing. I've had a very bad attitude in the past about my sexuality, and the fact that I'm disabled.. so for the longest time I kind of just ruled out any chance of having a real relationship. I've come to a point now where I realize that's just stupid.. and really one of the main things that's been holding me back is me. I'm still working on getting over the fear of coming out.. but I have a feeling if I did it wouldn't be so bad. I have fairly open minded friends.
Unfortunately though in our area we have no lgbt groups that I know of. Actually, because of where I live, I basically know about 2 gay people.. which isn't helpful lol. I've tried dating sites but those just disappoint me even further. I figure right now when I find someone I will.. but moving eventually may be a good thing. If I found someone I really liked I'd be out in a second.. but then again.. not being out could be a turn off in itself I suppose..
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I'm in a chair as well. I did not enter my first relationship till 23. It happened out of the blue. and I'm still with her. So never give up. Something will surprise you. 
Mick
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.there is a clubbing for peple with learning disabilities. i like clubbing with everone people not just disabled .but asel if i can meet a man who was disabled.i want a disabled boyfirned. it s 1bit for talking 1 bit for dancing!. meet a man who was disabeled. a gay ,man!i wish it. im happy abot it.
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Good luck, Joseph... In any case, even if you don't meet a boyfriend, you can have a jolly good night out dancing and getting it out of your system. Have fun, be safe, and be friendly with a lot of people. :biggrin:
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it was very good. .i love being gay becase peple sometimes only see about me im disabled. im gay aswel.i am same like alll the other gay pepple beacase gay.
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I have a quad buddy who is a CP victim. You see him and go HOW??? and watch him and go WOW!!!!. And try to keep up with him! The guy does not realize the he is DISABLED. It is something that belongs to someone else. I tease him about sitting around all day as he is confined to a wheel chair. He is a data specialist for a medical service. He dates ALL the time (but very few can understand what he says) (not interested in dating the same guy more than twice) (yes, he dated me but HE moved on). So what are you worried about? IT WILL HAPPEN and when you least expect it!!! In fact, one of these days you will roll over and look at the guy next to you in bed and go "HOLY S---! When did THAT happen?" Just make sure you do not become a recluse and let people see you so "he" can find you.
"In order to have friends, one must show himself friendly" (paraphrased)
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