Moving On? (advice please)

[Rainbowmum]

Oh Sweetheart , I am so very sorry.


Please know and believe that none of this is your fault.


You are such a brave young man for going to therapy ,it will give you the tools you need to get back out there.

The scars that betrayal leaves run deep and can destroy your confidence and trust.
Put yourself first at this difficult time, you need to heal,time to be to rediscover who you have become.
Every relationship leaves us changed.

Take care sweetie , we are all here for you.

[VagabondKitten]

Sorry to come into this a little late. First off, let me say I'm sorry for all that has happened to you. It would be hard not to have trust issues or be scared after all that you have been through. And I perfectly understand your feelings. I feel as though the only people who I seem to invite into my life have some sort of severe mental trauma of at least some sort or another. I'm not really sure if this is exactly it, but I feel that for me I relate to people better who have come from troubled backgrounds (I haven't been exactly mentally stable myself, but I've come leaps and bounds from where I once was). Do you find that to be true for yourself as well? For me, all of my failed relationships have steered me more in the direction of causing me to stop caring about relationships in general. I'm not really afraid of relationships or intimacy so much as I just feel very disinterested in the whole affair. I feel so withdrawn from the world at times.

So I guess I'm trying to say that I do understand your feelings. For me, what I have been working on is enjoying my life to the best of my ability, whether someone is there for me or not. The thing I've come to realize is, is that I don't need someone to be happy. I would love for some day, for someone to come along and just click with me in all the right ways, and for things to actually work out for a change, but I'm not going to sit around waiting for that person to come. That's not to say that you shouldn't always stay open to meeting people and seeing where things go, but don't take them seriously for a while, and if you see things in a person that are red flags, then stay away. You can only help people so much, and it gets to a point where they can only really help themselves.

Lastly, try to get out sometimes. Hang out with friends/coworkers/family. It's not good to always be by yourself (note that this is coming from an EXTREME introvert). Talking to others about your feelings really helps. I still hate it, and always feel stupid, or annoying when I talk about my feelings to others in person, but I do seem to come to a lot more realizations compared to when I keep my problems to myself. Anyways... sorry to ramble, hope this helps