Need advice!

[recalledz]

HI everyone!

So there is a guy i am dating. I dont really know what to do with him, i mean i am getting to like him, but he is just so suffocating and in need for attention. he is going super fast (had only met him for like a month), and he makes me feel as if we are already on a relationship. Indeed i am a very occupied person with work, college, and people to take care of, and it is stressing for me to be on the phone for an hour talking trivial chit-chat, yet he enjoys it so much. My little free time has been invaded by him and i still cant feel confortable with that. I dont want to leave him, but he seems to be demanding more and more of me everytime, and i just cannot give anymore. Although he is very kind and considerate, i know he needs more than i can give him given my circumsnatnces.
The thing is this has not been the first time this happens to me, everytime i start meeting a potential partner, i start to freak out, to the point where i just straight up dump them, i cant control it. i stop wanting to see them, i stop feeling atraction for them, stop feeling aroused for them, all i start seeing is the flaws... ok for one, the guys i have been dating were all very girly which is just a turn off for me, and they dont appeal me much. But still I just fear if i leave this guy i might be throwing away something that could turn out to be very nice, from all gays i k we have so much in common. I fear i might nver get into a rlationship...

Sorry for the long post and typos (i dont speak so much english) advice apreciated!

[Blue]

Be honest with him. He may not realize he is being so suffocating toward you. If, after you talk, you mutually decide that you can't give him what he needs and, he can't be satisfied with what you can give then, at least you will both understand and won't go off wondering what went wrong.

[EvenOlderButWiser]

the guys i have been dating were all very girly which is just a turn off for me, and they dont appeal me much.

Can I ask why you feel the need to date guys that are actually a turn off? I mean if there is no real attraction in the first place, then the relationship is bound to fail, and this could be why you start to feel suffocated as soon as the other person tries to move the relationship on to the next stage.

Seems to me your not being honest either with yourself or with the other guy(s) You should tell him the truth and move on, otherwise your just playing with his emotions.

Good luck,
ObW

[Rainbowmum]

First let me say

I really think you need to talk this out with him.
I am sorry you are feeling so crowded ,but I understand it fully.

It's only been a month and you are still very young ,tell him you are not ready for a full on relationship and ask him to understand that.

If you are feeling pressured and obligated the relationship will not work.
Even in a committed relationship you still need to be yourself and have time for yourself.

Explain to him that you want this relationship to develop slowly.