Hello, my name is Hugo

[ready74]

Ok...I'm 38 yrs old and I'm still in the closet. I guess also being attracted to women made it easier to be in denial about this, but the fact is I prefer men. I was born and raised in NY city and I was generally raised to be tough. I've dated a few women in my life, but, sexually, I've been with more men than women. I've always been honest with male sexual partners about being bisexual, but I've never been able to tell a woman about it; I think being able to be honest with men made me a lot more comfortable with them, and kept me from forming long lasting relationships with women. Unfortunately, my denial has also kept me from forming an intimate relationship with any past male sexual partners, I used to hope this was just a phase.
Well, I now know this is not a phase and I don't want it to be. I really do like who I am and I wouldn't be who I am, if I wasn't gay/bi. The problem is, I am so terrified of coming out; I'm a former Marine and I have always been seen as a masculine guy. it isn't the reaction I'm afraid of, it is being thought of a being less of a man by my family and friends. I have heard the jokes and the general disposition of my family and friends towards gays and it is negative.
I want to get comfortable with gay culture and scene, but I'm so scared of being found out that I don't dare go to a gay bar or club. Well...this can't continue, I'm really lonely and sad. Any advice at all is welcome. Thank you

[Counselor]

Good to hear you've come to terms with yourself, welcome!

[mihai]

Hi and welcome Hugo

[Corsac]

Hi and welcome

[Rainbowmum]

Hi and

Congrats on coming out to yourself , every one else can wait until you are comfortable.
Make your self at home .

Oh by the way it's okay to be muscular and gay , no labels , you are perfect the way you are.

[TomStatic]

Nice to meet you
Hope this site helps u figure some things out

[ChrisD]

Hello and Welcome!! I'm sure you'll find something helpful here.

[Aro]

Hi and Welcome !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[EvenOlderButWiser]

Hi Hugo and welcome to GS.

Your situation, while weighing you down is actually more common than you think.

Your never to old to take control, become who you are instead of being what others want you to be, and live your life how you want. It doesn't matter if your 25 or 65.

You will find a lot of support here on GS from people in all walks of life with a mix of experiences.

Welcome aboard.


ObW
(20 years military service, came out at 39)

[Chuck92]

Welcome to GS, Hugo...

Coming out to yourself is the first step to everything that is to come. Whether it be good or bad...

We'll be here to get you through the tough times