Alright fella's,
Im having problems in my relationship of 5 yrs and need some advise. I'm 25 and he's 33. I'm out more than my partner is and couldn't careless what people think about me where as he isn't (only to his mum, sis and a few others that are close to him). Im the first guy hes ever been in a relationship with. When we got together everything was spot on, now as the years go on I feel like its getting worse. I don't get any attention or affection from him anymore, I've told him and nothing has changed. Sex is probs every 2 weeks, if that. Morning sex that don't last long. We tend to argue a lot and I hold my hands up I start most of them. I know he loves me to bits and vice versa.
The other day, he went to his works Xmas party and told me two girls were flirting with him, one asked him to go to the toilet with him but he refused apparently. This has happen to me, but I would never come home and start talking about it to him.
I dunno what to do, I'm really unhappy and feel like crap. I'm not a emotional person, but really need some advice guys
Thanks for reading and let me know your thoughts
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The fact he tells you when someone is giving him attention is good, I hope you're the kind of person that would prefer he tell you before rumors start and get back to you some other way. Every relationship has lulls.
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You said that you have made you needs known to him and, that didn't work so, maybe a couples counselor would help - yes there are counselors that are fine with gay couples.
The fact that he feels safe in being open and honest with you is good, it shows he trusts you. Now the problem is getting your needs across to him and, working on solutions that work for both of you and, that's wher an objective third part, like a counselor can help.
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Have a look at the Relate website (Google it) They offer couples counselling for same sex partners.
As others have mentioned, its not that unusual to have ups and downs in a relationship, straight or otherwise. Ive had my share of those.
Communication is key, and Relate can help unlock the problems if he's reluctant to discuss direct with you.
Works Christmas parties can be a minefield, especially if the invitation is extended to partners. It does sound to me like you want more from the relationship than he's willing to give right now.
Good luck, and  to the forum.
ObW
x
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"The other day, he went to his works Xmas party and told me two girls were flirting with him, one asked him to go to the toilet with him but he refused apparently. This has happen to me, but I would never come home and start talking about it to him."
Why would you hide it? I'd much rather hear it from my partner than hear it from someone else. It would make me wonder why he didn't tell me.
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the end of the year, Christmas time is when most people can be un happy reflecting too much on what doesnt work in their life. It may be just the time of the year. Reflect on what IS working.
most human relationships burn out to a friendship with time. Keep in mind that big gay relationship will not change who you are. Work on the relationship you have with your self, dont let that burn out too, you can change how you see the world.
it takes two to argue, just say; "I am not going to argue with you Honey" and dont. Can you recall your last three arguments? No. So they are not that important anyways to you.
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Thank you all for taking the time to read my post and responding It's definitely helped me out. Hope you all have a fantastic Xmas and new year 
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First let me say welcome to G.S.
Every relationship has it's cool off stages , when the initial honeymoon stage starts to wear off.
Just a normal part of any relationship , you no longer have to spend every single second with each other ,and go everywhere with each other.
You are pretty lucky to have such an honest partner , it really is a good thing.
I understand some of the frustration associates with being closeted , he is living in fear, he will come out eventually , and these things take time, he has to find his comfort level.
What is worrying me more than him coming out ,is the dissatisfaction you are feeling in this relationship , your unhappiness is obviously the cause of much unrest in your relationship , and no doubt your pain and sadness.
I would like to suggest couple counseling ,you could both benefit from it.
Things can be brought up in these sessions that really need airing, before you can both move forward as a couple in a loving relationship.
One of our members here ,Bowyn Aerrow could give you some more advice on the counseling sessions , as he has been through it.
We are all here for you , I am so very sorry that you feel neglected.
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To be honest, in order to give you proper advice I think I should know you personally, but since that's not possible I would tell you about my own personal experience. I was in a situation very similar to yours. At the end, it got so bad that we spent a month showing no affection to each other, being cold, distant, as old chaps who fell out big time and constantly bump into each other... at the end we broke it off and after 6 months got back together. Those 6 moths were awful, but extremely useful. It's been 2 years since we got back together and we are happier than at the beginning, still, we have our fallouts and some weeks we don't even have sex and some others we have daily sex... I've always been very critical on couples who take a break but it turned out to save my relationship
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Honestly, I don't really see any real problem in your relationship. So the novelty's wears off, big deal, that is normal in every relationship. If you've talk to your partner and didn't get a response then act. Don't just wait for the romance to come swooping in again, take the initiative and kindle the fire yourself. Take a holiday together, try something new, fun, adventurous, that always set the mood. After all, you are very lucky to have someone who loves you very much.
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Help... Advice on relationship
