Found out my partner was/is a escort please help

[sillyboy86]

It's a difficult situation for you, but I think that is more complicated for him. Probably he is fighting against a lot of things within himself, the emotions for you, his own pride etc. Financial matters is a big problem for someone that has fight a lot doing things like crazy-borderline works.
I agree with all the people here.

[pellaz]

anyways i forgot to say:
welcome to gayspeak, its your first post

this is certainly bad holiday news for you . I suspect things are beyond this but You could say one other thing, mainly because i am sure you thought of it but you could say you would support him financially? Say something along the lines; "we will have to budget things but I think we can make it through". Its a recession and no employment is safe.

thank again its difficult to gleem everything from a single post. I am sure you thought all angles through and did what was best.

[Blue]

He is telling you, so not cheating or lying to you. Trust me, any one of us will do whatever it takes to get food and a remotely decent place to sleep. Say you never would, but, let me take your job, your money, your home and leave you with one change of clothes in a bag and, no friends to mooch off of - see just what you do.

I might fault someone for doing certain things when there is a good alternative that does not involve being homeless and going to a shelter, losing everything but, when it comes to sheer desperation driven survival - hey, go for it. I have done a few thing I'm not proud of, or even okay with to survive but, it was just that, a means to getting to a better place, and the only viable means of doing it available to me.

Get over it, tough times mean you do what you must to get by.

[Geminize]

Vibes, welcome to GS. From what you have written, I think it's time for you to move on. If you are looking for a long term relationship, trust is an important part of that. It sounds like you already have a pattern of broken trust on both sides of this relationship. He has lied to you about his past sexual activity. You have violated his privacy on his phone and computer because you distrust him.

When he says he wants you to "carry his last name" someday, while at the same time he is flirting and planning to meet up with another guy, that is simply manipulation. He wants you available in case the next guy doesn't work out. If he truly feels you love him as no one else has, he needs to man up and give you his full attention. Nothing else would work for me in a long term relationship.

I agree with others here that there's no point in reporting him or telling his mother. I don't think that will bring you closer. If he wants to break his sexual patterns he needs to be the one to motivate that.

You sound like you have the emotional tools to move on in a healthy way. Be clear about what you need in a relationship. Stay in contact with him as a friend if you want: that relationship may still evolve. Just don't let him keep you on a hook while he continues behavior that doesn't work for you in a significant relationship.

Take care of your heart in the process, especially on your upcoming birthday. Sometimes letting go is the best gift you can give yourself.

[zeon]

Hello Love,
So so sorry to hear about your poor exscuse of a potential partner infact ill tell you what... When you see him next tell him to go bollocks... Hisd a poor excuse of a human i mean the escorting ok its a job its an income if he was doing that and being loyal to you thats fine and by this i mean providing money and warmth to you through escorting but to just expect to leave you just after your birthday thats cruel dont give him a second chance once bitten twice as shy and dont let him make you because you sound a nice guy dont let him dampen ya spirits and rememb er your the colour shining out of the black and white spaces which is where he belongs

big hugz xxxxxxxxx

[Rainbowmum]

Time to let go , he has his life to live and you have yours.
It's not like he cheated on you ,and to be 100% honest with you , not matter how you justify it , you invaded his privacy.

He is trying to let you down softly, he does not want to work through this.

Let go , for your sake and his.