I don't think the friend of a sibling is a "no touch zone". But acting the way he does is no indication that he's gay, loads of straight guys mess around like that.
It'll be up to you. You could just ask him if he's gay or not and see what he replies.
Well..... find out if this friend is actually gay or not, and then depending on the type of person he is you might want to try and build up some kind of relationship first. If he is uhhh....... romantically aggressive as you kinda described, you *may* have to do less of the relationship forming first (however don't initiate something if you're unsure about how he will react, hence the relationship). If he's on the fence and just likes to joke around, do not skip that first step. Also keep in mind what RockerBlocks said- how would your brother react to this?
Spectrum7 Wrote:Really now, I don't see any problem with him being your brother's friend. Friends can be made again and again, endlessly. But a chance at happiness....
What do you mean exaxtly when you say you "want" this friend? It is just pure carnal desire, or is there something more? If it's just sex, that's a lot simpler. If you do want a relationship, that's a lot more complicated.
There are a lot of ways to "reveal" a guy's true feelings. Alcohol, drug, jump him when he has a fever...etc. The point is that you really should have some way to find out what this friend of yours really feel about you. If it's nothing, then, idk, jump him when he's semiconscious, have a fling, get it out of your system, then move on quickly and quitely. If it is something, then have a serious talk and go from there.
Goodluck on your little "venture"!
It is strange, and frustrating!! i want more then sex, but less then a relationship!! i was thinking about making a move, and play it off as a joke if thinkgs go bad!! lol
nickkolick Wrote:It is strange, and frustrating!! i want more then sex, but less then a relationship!! i was thinking about making a move, and play it off as a joke if thinkgs go bad!! lol
Above all things, you should learn the value of honesty. Playing your feelings as "a joke" will only hurt you later when you wish you had been honest. If you have the balls to make a move, do it, but prepare yourself to give an honest explanation. If he isn't the type that gets skittish around people that tell the truth, just talk to him before you make any moves.
I almost totally agree with RockerBlocks. You are entering a dangerzone. Do not be afraid to be a friend but let him make the moves. If he is curious, yhe will do so. If he does not, then you have not done any harm between him and your brother. Use your best judgement. You heart will tell you what to do.
I'm going to be blunt and say if you are looking for something meaningful and serious, forget about it. If you are looking for something sexual, forget about it. Why?
First, I have been there before. It wasn't my brother's friend but a classmate in 7th grade and a friend. I'm in 7th grade Social Studies and I am gawking at this boy sitting across from me. Really great looking boy. I was staring at his tight shorts and just imagining what was beneath them. He and the guy sitting next to him must have known because they were laughing up a storm. Well, maybe a few months later on the school bus. He decided to come over to my seat and stand over me. I could totally see up his shorts. I pretended to be innocent, but like d the view for the 5 seconds a let myself look. BINGO! Right? Wrong. He knew that I was digging him and either wanted to humiliate me or get some attention.
The second instance was a friend that lived down the street from me. He was a darker tone, athletic legs and he always wore short shorts. In fact they were just the right length that I could see up his shorts when he sat down or spread his legs. Of course, I was looking and of course he seemed to know. One day we were in his room and he decided to change clothes in front of me. I was glued at his bulge in his tighty whites.. He kind of giggled and called me a "fag". We went to different High Schools and I would see him occasionally. One of the last times I saw him he was walking past my house lifting up his shirt a little and smiling.
My point with these stories, people know. Especially if you show interest or act different around them. I'm 100% sure that neither of those instances would have led to a relationship or even a fondle session. Primarily because that was the 1990's when gay was not as accepted as it is today, but also because they both were into girls. I would have been an experiment or something to make them feel good about themselves. He hasn't expressed meaningful interest in you than he's probably not going to be serious toward you. It sounds like you are more into him than you are saying. I would say explore your sexuality on your own and if/when you come out, pay attention to how he acts.
Like most have said, be careful. You are a younger brother. It is easy for older siblings and their friends to play around with you, By the way, has there been any action recently? It sounds like most of it happened five years ago when he was laying on you and noticing your elbow on his penis. It sounds like a few exchanges between you and him have left you in fantasy land for the past few years. Have you spoken to your brother about his friend? You don't need to tell him anything just maybe ask questions about his dating life. Ask your brother what his friend has been up to lately. You might get some information from your brother that might give you some direction. Here's something I've lived by: If he hasn't said he's gay then assume he is not, even if he is showing some signs.
There are plenty of cases when hiding your emotions is more or less the only appropriate reaction. There are also lots of situations where doing the opposite would be pointless and cruel.
It doesn't really matter whether you speak out or hide your own feelings - just think it through properly so there'll be no regrets and make sure you only make decisions you'd be willing to take responsibility for if the time comes.
Though a bit to the extreme haha this video clearly demonstrates that we shouldn't assume what others perceive. Thanks for posting this pellaz. I was laughing hysterically by the end of it.
I want my brother's friend
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i was thinking about making a move, and play it off as a joke if thinkgs go bad!! lol
