Dont expect much

[brituc1]

I've reached out to several ppl here and gotten some great insight at some points. but ultimately, all the advice you will receive here is superficial. you'll get "hang in there" comments and "we will be there for you" comments and "it will get better" comments, but ultimately its about as superficial as the concern of a used car salesman. i had resigned hope to accepting that i am looking out for me and me alonne until I found this sight and thought maybe there are others that were in similar situations that could help me. But in the end you will get comments from people that will try to tell you that your problems are insignificant because they feel their problems are far worse than yours and you shouldnt be here complaining when others are suffering so much more. Or, you wil get ppl that will take advantage of you to get some kinda personal gain or try to buddy up to you because of your looks and could care less about what is going on with your life. I'm only writing this for other ppl looking for help who will be failed. you can reply all you want, i dont give a shit. i wont be back.

[SolemnBoy]

People do come with advice here although since all the information they get is a few paragraphs, obviously they can't judge the situation PERFECTLY.

But there's still more to it than "hang in there" comments and I'm not even sure what you're referring to when you talk about people taking advantage of each other. And anyways, even if a person provides only his perspective on things and not actual advice, that's still a good thing. Different perspectives is important when dealing with a problem.

I'm sorry you feel like that though, I guess you had some bad experience with it

[Marc]

Mate what's happened?
I just pm'ed you if you want to chat.

[Geminize]

Sorry you feel that way, Brituc. I disagree. Sometimes the advice is superficial, as you say, and there are times when just knowing I've been heard and a few words of encouragement are what I need. I have also received more detailed advice, which I have appreciated .

I hope you're ok. Really.

[dfiant]

This place is full of the most caring people with great diversity and many insightful views on many topics. Where ever you are, someone else has already been, and in some situations the best advice sometimes is to 'hang in there'.

I thing a lot of peoples problems with advice is they hear things that they don't want to hear, and what they want to hear isn't been said...life is like that unfortunately. A lot of things you can change, other things you can alter by changing something else, and then there are others that only time will help.

[jimbopdxus]

I can see Brituc's point. Society wants to be supportive but not get personally involved. This is the training from the "experts". and it falls very short of what real needs are. What is wrong with getting personal and getting away from just dishing out advice? I know I talk WAY TO MUCH but then I am also trying to learn to just shut up and listen. Coffee somewhere. Sit up all night. Whatever it takes to get back on track. It is too bad that we cannot get personal and really involved, or just meet up, hold a hand, give a hug and let them know you REALLY care about the one askling for help. Sure it may take up YOUR valuable time, but then what is more valuable, your time of thier life? Do not be afraid to say, "I LOVE YOU AND CANNOT IMAGINE LIFE WITHOUT YOU HERE." And that needs to be said to everyone! Am I making sense or just spouting nonsense again?

[Counselor]

I hope you find what you are looking for, good luck!

[Pix]

The site works for me. I don't need to be coddled or have people I don't know that well to make me one of their projects, and I don't attach an umbilical cord to anyone, offline or on. And here I've gained valuable insights, and when I asked questions I'm rarely disappointed...usually even when it doesn't live up to my hopes it's still helpful and I just look elsewhere for what I need.

Let's see, offhand I've asked for help in raising my son, about trouble I got into an office while volunteering to set up for a Halloween party, and how to deal with a scammer who tried conning me, and the many answers in all 3 of these threads gave me insights that I found very helpful. I also gained new understanding into multiple things I've wondered about, from something as trivial as why gender bending metalheads of the 80s were against gays to something as deep as why do some gays act in ways that utterly confused me (and may potentially help me save a life in the future). I've even received good info on submarines here.

In addition to that I've greatly enjoyed exchanging the funny pix and vids, the jokes, and bouncing ideas off each other. When I moved to where I am now I lost contact with many people and felt the loss and this place helps me laugh and feel connected.

The moments of sarcasm or hostility have been rare in the extreme and generally don't bother me as I know a little bickering is natural. And I don't recall anyone treating me the way brituc1 describes.

So yeah, I love this place. mile:

[ceez]

it'll never be as good as having a friend there in person but the people on this site really do care, or we wouldn't be responding to this thread. its just that sometimes all we are able to do is say "hang in there" or "it gets better" because we can't be there in person. for me some times that's all it takes to get me through.

[Rainbowmum]

I am sorry you feel that way and hope you find a place that makes you happy.
It's a shame you feel so neglected , this place has the most caring supportive people you will find.

Good luck , we will all still be here for you ,if you choose to return.