Give Bad Advice

[Counselor]

Eggs, trim cottage cheese, blueberries, and white tea. Best dinner ever.

My nose hair has become unmanageable.

[Beau]

Tell your nose hair to shape up or ship out.

I'm thoroughly enjoying my weekend and don't want to work on Monday.

[monk]

Have another Sunday.

I'd really love to go swimming but there isn't a pool anywhere near me.

[Beau]

Turn on the sprinkler and start splashing in the wet yard.

I need to leave now.

[stpdo2]

stay and sort your sock drawer instead

I need to clean up the dishes

[elad12]

Just throw them out and buy new ones

My kitchen drain is clogged

[Rainbowmum]

Pour some quick set cement in it.

I need a way to keep the toilet seat down.

[Counselor]

Tour helium balloons to it.

I'm bored and I can't watch the movie I want.

[monk]

Watch a movie you don't want to see.

I've got stomach-ache.

[Beau]

Hit your toe with a hammer. You won't feel the stomach ache anymore.

I need the dog to leave my bedroom.