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Does it always hurt?
#1
like my first time having sex i was the bottom. does it alway hurt when having anal sex or was he just doing it wrong...like the whole time I felt pain...like in the future if i want to be the bottom will it always hurt...? idk im to inexperienced to know XD help Tongue
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#2
Depends.

If its a deep ache/pain and not a burning sensation it is possible your prostate is sensitive and you need to have it checked for potential infection.

A slight prostate infection may not lead to testicle pain and pain all the time, but if you are ready to have a BM it could hurt from the pressure and could hurt during anal sex.

If its a burning pain, it is possible there wasn't enough lube or you all went too fast. Understand that the anus is not designed to accept thing going in it is designed to allow things to go out. However, the sphincter muscles can relax and be 'trained' to accept in and out with a little patience and lots of lube.

IF you have regular sex say 3+ times a week you most likely will find that the pain goes away after the first week. However if you stop having sex for a while, the pain will return again.

Fingering is a good idea, as is using SMALL dildos and other toys.

It is possible you are just one of those guys who can't take anything up the bum - it happens.

A consummate/experienced lover will know more about it and will take his time.

One thing you can try is laying on your sides, spooning with him behind you. YOU ride back onto him. This way you have the control, thus will relax more, and you can adjust at your speed.

If you used condoms and there was all over burning sensation it is possible you are sensitive/allergic to latex and/or the lube.
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#3
I only had sex once XD. I'm just curious if it will always be like my first time. He was abnormally large and went fast. I'm like a n00b at sex lol
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#4
I am having the same issue here..
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#5
I wouldnt know. Any takers?
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#6
assuming you are a healthy individual with none of the stuff described in post #2 and no anal wounds, inflammation, infection and so on you need to keep in mind that:

1. your anus will initially be very tight the first couple times which makes it a bit more unpleasant.

2. you will probably feel somewhat anxious, nervous which only makes things worse.

so trust in your partner is a plus for you to relax emotionally - which will in turn relax your muscles.

your partner needs to know its your first time and go slowly, using the fingers first which will help you relax and use lots of lube. consider anything that might help you relax - calm music, massage, oils....

you and your partner need to take all the necessary time no matter how long it takes until you feel comfortable; and the more you do it the more it will come naturally in time.
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#7
I find myself in a similar situation. I consider myself predominantly a top, though I love to have my ass played with and fingered, even a good rim job from time to time. My boyfriend is pretty much a top too, but everytime we've tried it with me on bottom it hurts. Not an "oh my god I'm being ripped in half" kind of hurt, but enough discomfort to make me want to stop. But I really want to bottom for him.
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#8
AppleGeek Wrote:He was abnormally large and went fast.

This is a horror movie plot combination.
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#9
My biggest question is, how do you get the muscles to relax so you and your partner can both enjoy the experience? Everyone keeps saying to "relax the inner sphincter" but nobody says how to.
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#10
archubbycub Wrote:My biggest question is, how do you get the muscles to relax so you and your partner can both enjoy the experience? Everyone keeps saying to "relax the inner sphincter" but nobody says how to.

1. Relax yourself. 2 Have him go as far as he can wihtout hurting you and just sit there. The muscles will tire out quickly and he can proceed. (I read this in a book, so I have no idea if it really works)
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