I must be very sick in the head. I apologize.

[Lalo]

^^ ^^

[Hayden]

Young guys not only prefer amusement parks, they can hang there all day long.

Hey you! Yeah you, the one so liberal with his hurtful use of stereotypes. I'll have you know that after an hour and a half at Disney Land I start to get very cranky. There's too many people, the music's always too loud, and adventure scares me. So there!

[Lalo]

IDK - I want someone who remembers the 1980's because they lived it, and feathered hair, and guys wearing mullets and the smooth tunes of my time. I want a guy who recalls a world without MTV, or that Micheal Jackson really was a black man and was turning white with his music Video Thriller.

I want a guy who can sit there on the couch next to me and see some star and say with me 'Damn she's gotten old - oh - Damn I'm (we're) old...' Or talk about the obvious face lifts and recall the time when that 'gal' was young and smooth of skin about a dozen face lifts ago.

I want to wake up next to a guy who is as geriatric as me. I want us both to groan in unison as we climb into bed, I want to count the grey hairs on his head (or the ones falling out) as he counts the white ones on my head and laugh together over this whole 'Gee where did the last decade go, am I really that old?' thing.

I want a guy who can listen to the origin 'Like a Virgin' and recall where he was when it came out on the radio as a brand spanking new song in 1985. For the record I was 19 years old in that year. Or recalls how Madonna playing Evita was just plain wrong (She was such a bad girl back in the day).

I want a guy who remembers Reagan was not all that and a bag of chips, that Reagan was a dick and actually deserved to be shot (Where were you the day Reagan was shot?).

Kids now days are listening to music that was from my time, sure they have pumped it up and added more beat and remixed it, but it was my music and I want to be with a guy who recalls when it was our music and great just the way it was - in the good old days.

I don't want to be with a kid, some guy who was in diapers back when I was in my late teens. I want a guy who has a common frame of reference and understands why I am the way I am politically and socially due to what we lived through in those formative years.

I was an adult when 9-11-01 took place, I have guys wanting to 'date' who were in middle school/Junior high thus didn't relate to the events of that day in the same way I did. They will never recall a world where TSA didn't strip search people, where non-flying 'visitors' could meet travelers at gates, etc.

Its like that for a lot of things - that common frame of reference, of being in the same point in one's life when world events changed the world.

Frankly, I can't see how two people with 20+ years age difference can see eye to eye, or have anything to talk about when it comes to life lessons and where 'I' have been (whoever or wherever "I" is/was).

All of my adult life I have only had a simple request. I want one guy to grow old and grey with... Here I am 6 guys later and I'm still wanting that.

There's really not a damn thing in that ^^ that I can disagree with. If that's the way that you feel, then that's the way it is. There's a problem in numbers though. I have this nagging suspicion, completely unproven mind you, that when you limit yourself to an older (our age) group, you are also limiting the likelihood of finding a compatible person. Why? Well here's my thinking:

1. Gay men our age are less in number. Let's face it, if you are of the generation that lived through the initial onslaught of AIDS, you have witnessed friends die. Then there is just the natural attrition rate. Every year that we get older, the more likely we are to die from something. So the numbers as a whole aren't very good.

2. The Nesting Factor- As we get older we look a lot more seriously at bed partners as prospective life partners. I think that we are far more likely to find someone who is "reasonably" compatible and make a nest than we were when we were in our twenties. And once you find that partner, as you age together, the thought of leaving that relationship becomes scarier and scarier.

3. Marriage Material- Let's face it, some guys ARE marriage material, and some guys just aren't. A lot of guys really don't want to be married, they like playing the field and will vow to do so until their dying day. As we age, the number of unmarried guys who fall into this category rises, while the numbers of single guys who are still looking falls. So when you see a lot of ads from older guys chasing young guys, I think a lot of it has to do with that. Also, after a certain age, older guys may see the situation of dating a young guy as a win-win situation. I have two older friends who were both in long term committed relationships for YEARS. Both had their partners die after years of being together, and both of them jumped back into the dating scene by hooking up with younger partners. The more well-off one has a new partner who is 40 years younger and a complete gold digger. But my friend has his trophy boy and is very happy.

So, what does all of this mean? Who the hell knows? If I were single I would be making a call on you, I know that. But I am not. But keep putting yourself out there. You never know when it might pay off. Good luck, my elf.

[partisan]

Theres, nothing, wrong, with, that, as,you, know,

[partisan]

I find lads, my, own, age, try to be, matey, our insecure, inexperienced, in, bed, i, usually, get, on, better, with, a, bit, above, my, age, range, i, can have, good, chat, with, a, 90yo, and, find, common, ground, (not, sexually) but, what, do, i, know, just, a, mtv, kid, with, no, origanal, thoughts, of, my, own,

[partisan]

A guy, ten, or, so, years, older, than, i, usually, see’s, me bettet, knows, what, i, like, ive, haf, plenty, of, attention, from, younget, also, who, also, want, to "top" but, i, feel, more, secure, and, happy, with, someone, 10-15years, older, maybe, im, sick, in, the, head,

[Bowyn Aerrow]

So to clarify I'm too young for you?

Yes baby, you are too young.

[Bowyn Aerrow]

There's really not a damn thing in that ^^ that I can disagree with. If that's the way that you feel, then that's the way it is. There's a problem in numbers though. I have this nagging suspicion, completely unproven mind you, that when you limit yourself to an older (our age) group, you are also limiting the likelihood of finding a compatible person. Why? Well here's my thinking:

1. Gay men our age are less in number. Let's face it, if you are of the generation that lived through the initial onslaught of AIDS, you have witnessed friends die. Then there is just the natural attrition rate. Every year that we get older, the more likely we are to die from something. So the numbers as a whole aren't very good.

2. The Nesting Factor- As we get older we look a lot more seriously at bed partners as prospective life partners. I think that we are far more likely to find someone who is "reasonably" compatible and make a nest than we were when we were in our twenties. And once you find that partner, as you age together, the thought of leaving that relationship becomes scarier and scarier.

3. Marriage Material- Let's face it, some guys ARE marriage material, and some guys just aren't. A lot of guys really don't want to be married, they like playing the field and will vow to do so until their dying day. As we age, the number of unmarried guys who fall into this category rises, while the numbers of single guys who are still looking falls. So when you see a lot of ads from older guys chasing young guys, I think a lot of it has to do with that. Also, after a certain age, older guys may see the situation of dating a young guy as a win-win situation. I have two older friends who were both in long term committed relationships for YEARS. Both had their partners die after years of being together, and both of them jumped back into the dating scene by hooking up with younger partners. The more well-off one has a new partner who is 40 years younger and a complete gold digger. But my friend has his trophy boy and is very happy.

So, what does all of this mean? Who the hell knows? If I were single I would be making a call on you, I know that. But I am not. But keep putting yourself out there. You never know when it might pay off. Good luck, my elf.

Yeah... the numbers game.

Fewer and fewer available 'old gays' out there.

Well I ain't got the money to be that old guy who keeps a houseboy, so THAT is off the docket.

I guess its old lady-hood and cats in my future...

[partisan]

Its, not, that, i, want, a, one-sided relationship, theres, talk, of, the adored, and, the, adorer, thats, not, nice, for either, party, to, love, is, just, if, more, important, than, to, be, loved,

In, life, i, can, hold, my, ground, on, any, topic, with, most, age, groups,

Condensending to, be, called, a, kid, esp, if, youve, had, a, difficult, life, i, believe, there, can, also, be, internal, ages, in, some, aspects, and, age, isnt, the, ultimate, denominator, of, wisdom,

[Lalo]

^^ I agree with that. ^^