Hi all
Finally got round to this, sorry for delay, decided not to do it with quotes anyway.
Summary.
Not unexpectantly, the response here is somewhat different to when having this debate with heterosexuals, for whom the main issues revolve around encroachment on the their institution of marriage, IE Man / woman and children.
Seems that most of the concerns expressed here, is that using a different descriptive would exacerbate the perception that gay people are “second-classâ€Â, be detrimental, and not afford the same status / meaning as having one term IE marriage.
At the outset, I used the term “union†only to differentiate between same-sex partnerships and heterosexual partnerships, and not as a term that should be used.
My point of view.
I (and this is my
personal opinion) don’t approve of the use of the term “marriage†to verbalise our relationship (Not because I’m old and don’t understand 21 Century technology,
). But because I believe this is the soft option, In the short term, it may well result in
equality before the law but I doubt it will do much in the long term for
equality before society. That will only materialise when we fight like hell for it.
By way of example
In our country, among many other’s, there are 2 big ethnic groups, The Zulu and the Xhosa
Both have different cultures, different rituals, different heritages, by and large they even support different political parties
Often there is violent conflict between them however neither dominates the other. As soon as one takes a swipe at the other, there is an immediate retaliation. At best they tolerate each other.
Why? Because both are equally strong… Kind of a Mexican stand-off. It ain’t cool, but it works.
Where the wheels come off
That is where I believe our plot falls apart. We don’t seem to have this fierce drive to create our own culture / heritage / identity.
Seems to me we would rather try to piggy-back and lay claim to equality (such as in using the term marriage) than to stand firm, create our own identity our own terminology, Icons, earn respect and eventually create heritage and fight like hell to make it equal.
It’s as hard as hell to argue a case for “equal before societyâ€Â
(read respect) if we don’t do anything to earn it
Admittedly, In SA, the political issues around same-sex have been negated. As you know our rights to equality are protected in the constitution, and therefore we are already streets ahead in as much that we are
"equal before the law".
But make no mistake, the words “sexual orientation†where only included because the rights of all had to be included, not out of a sudden feeling of kinship for gays.
Make no mistake. It does not sit well with the current government, who would just as soon remove it where it possible.
And what do we do to justify this precious concession? This political “hot-potatoâ€�
On an individual basis, a bit here and a bit there.
But as a collective? Nothing much of consequence.
We have all the resources other groups can only dream of.
We are well placed: - Doctors / lawyers / advocates / Judges / businessmen / advisors at the highest echelons of government. / teachers / engineers / architects you name it, were in there.
Money abounds, pink money is hugely powerful.
Yet as a collective, we just don’t seem to be able to harness these resources and channel them for the greater good.
Meanwhile children languish in welfare, we have a huge problem with child-headed households, our education system’s falling apart (avr of 22% pass rate at university and 600 000 children starting school every year don’t finish).
There is so much that can be done to earn respect and legitimacy in society…
What do we do?
We’are keen to dance like clowns through the streets on “prideâ€Â...
(Hell I hate that event)..
I hope this debate is a wee bit of food for thought, It’s not intended to anger
RGDS
Trial by error