hank Wrote:I do like being a proctor, its a role I am natural in. But I like to be able to let my guard down from time to time, expose my frailties but you have you have a trustworthy person for that, and I find myself running low on that kind of person.
Yes we all need a person or a group of people we can drop our mask/guard and be ourselves with. Right now you do have us here at Gayspeak to let that guard slip a little. We are a pretty accepting group of people, a family.
Like any other family we have our moments, but for the most part most of the people here care and won't hold most things against you or anyone else for more than a day.  
I understand the plight of being in a place where there are few trustworthy people. I have my 'trust issues' LOL.
If it helps you can send me a PM any time and talk about whatever; rant, cry on my shoulder, confess your deepest worries/fears - whatever you need. I have been known to 'take confession' - I know a lot of stuff about a lot of people and it never goes beyond me.
I am very good at keeping secrets, mine, theirs, yours - :biggrin:
Eventually you will find that one person who you can have both protective moments with and moments of 'weakness' where they protect you. That is something that a loving relationship offers.
I fear my crystal ball has a huge crack in it, while I know in general you will find someone to share yourself with, I fear the darn ball refuses to say who or exactly when.
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Thanks bowyn I appreciate it
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hank Wrote:I am queer, not sure about being bisexual or gay, why I need labels like that I don't know. But this is the world I love in. I post these threads to get perspective, not answers . I never asked fur answers, i never asked a question. The lamb thing still makes no sense to me. All humans are on never ending quests for understanding, at least I hope they are. How dreadful to think i know everything.
Again your post seems more of an irritated response to some question you imagined.
No Sis, you'll know when I am irritated or annoyed, trust, you'll get first dibs.
And I did not imagine any questions, but merely gave my insight to your dilemma. So you want perspective, okay, but you seem to not even understand the perspective(s) of which you seek, which is completely redundant and quite frankly, therefore irrelevant to you, since you don't understand. As you took what I said to be an irritated response, when I clearly was no where near irritated.
I am a bit now.
There's no shame in knowledge, and to know a vast deal, doesn't mean you lose the curiosity or eagerness to understand, but merely changes your perspective on how such things can be understood and how.
Innovation will perpetually continuate new things to understand and to be curious about. So yes, Humans are not only on the quest, but are an integral part of it, so the amount of knowledge you have attained does not differ the outcome, but merely provides different facets to understand it/them.
The Lamb is basically the personification of what you touched on, the part of us that is lost, that we often seek to understand.
For you, this means your paradox of emotions and mental processes, because though you know yourself, you don't understand and so the embodiment of that would be the phrase "Little Lost Lamb, in the City I Am" which can basically or in lamens terms be equivalated to;
"I don't understand"
If you know what you are, that's the bees knees hunni, but I merely made this assesment of what I know of you so far, how you come across and the things you post/say. Not based off of an imaginary question.
I am just very honest and blunt, so if it comes off irritated, I'm sorry, but believe you me hunni, nothing (not even this post) I've previously said was out of Irritation.
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I have been 6'-4" since 5th grade. I even towered over my teachers then. I was always the tallest guy in school, until I got into High School.
I was made fun of because of my height, but nobody really bothered me.
Nowdays because Im overweight AND tall, I will walk into a shop sometimes and the cashier will RUN to the back of the store and not come out until Im gone. I could probably walk out of the store with a ton of stuff, but I dont.
So, I do know what you are talking about. I figured that out back when I was in school though.
And it CAN work to your advantage too!!!!
I just find it EXTREMELY insulting that the the first thing people always said to me was "What basketball team do you play on"? I would just turn and walk off.
I had one woman running through the store after me one day screaming at me..."GET SOMETHING DOWN FOR ME"!!!
For some reason people think Im their damned personal step ladder.
Now Im not mean, if I see someone reaching for something they obviously cant reach, I will ask them if I can get it for them. But having some lunatic bitch running after me through the damned store screaming at me.....I DONT THINK SO!!! There ARE such things as EMPLOYEES at these places who get paid to do those things.
Oh well, I got off track.
But I know what you mean.
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MisterTinkles Wrote:I have been 6'-4" since 5th grade. I even towered over my teachers then. I was always the tallest guy in school, until I got into High School.
I was made fun of because of my height, but nobody really bothered me.
Nowdays because Im overweight AND tall, I will walk into a shop sometimes and the cashier will RUN to the back of the store and not come out until Im gone. I could probably walk out of the store with a ton of stuff, but I dont.
So, I do know what you are talking about. I figured that out back when I was in school though.
And it CAN work to your advantage too!!!!
I just find it EXTREMELY insulting that the the first thing people always said to me was "What basketball team do you play on"? I would just turn and walk off.
I had one woman running through the store after me one day screaming at me..."GET SOMETHING DOWN FOR ME"!!!
For some reason people think Im their damned personal step ladder.
Now Im not mean, if I see someone reaching for something they obviously cant reach, I will ask them if I can get it for them. But having some lunatic bitch running after me through the damned store screaming at me.....I DONT THINK SO!!! There ARE such things as EMPLOYEES at these places who get paid to do those things.
Oh well, I got off track.
But I know what you mean.
I know exactly what you mean. Never became upset with people asking me if I played sports, the people that piss me off are the ones that tell me i could have been great. I am great, I always thought sports were stupid.
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QueenOdi Wrote:No Sis, you'll know when I am irritated or annoyed, trust, you'll get first dibs.
And I did not imagine any questions, but merely gave my insight to your dilemma. So you want perspective, okay, but you seem to not even understand the perspective(s) of which you seek, which is completely redundant and quite frankly, therefore irrelevant to you, since you don't understand. As you took what I said to be an irritated response, when I clearly was no where near irritated.
I am a bit now.
There's no shame in knowledge, and to know a vast deal, doesn't mean you lose the curiosity or eagerness to understand, but merely changes your perspective on how such things can be understood and how.
Innovation will perpetually continuate new things to understand and to be curious about. So yes, Humans are not only on the quest, but are an integral part of it, so the amount of knowledge you have attained does not differ the outcome, but merely provides different facets to understand it/them.
The Lamb is basically the personification of what you touched on, the part of us that is lost, that we often seek to understand.
For you, this means your paradox of emotions and mental processes, because though you know yourself, you don't understand and so the embodiment of that would be the phrase "Little Lost Lamb, in the City I Am" which can basically or in lamens terms be equivalated to;
"I don't understand"
If you know what you are, that's the bees knees hunni, but I merely made this assesment of what I know of you so far, how you come across and the things you post/say. Not based off of an imaginary question.
I am just very honest and blunt, so if it comes off irritated, I'm sorry, but believe you me hunni, nothing (not even this post) I've previously said was out of Irritation.
I am sorry I don't think you understood my post. I wasn't seeking something or trying to break down barriers.
I have difficulty showing people that I am a human just the same as anybody else. they see a giant people sometimes recoil in fear from simply my stature.
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Basketball? I don't get that question and why there is the assumption that everyone tall plays B-ball?
Its sort of like assuming that everyone as wide as a mac truck plays football (American style) as a line backer or something.
Perhaps the best counter to such a question is to ask which horse they are a jockey on? And if they tell you would have made a great B-Ball player you should point out that they would have made a great jockey.... :biggrin:
While I'm not as tall as either Hank or Mr. Tinkles, being 'only' 6'1" and a tad over, I get 'asked' to reach for things on the top shelf by short people. I can only pity the 'height challenged' and hope that someday there will be a cure for their crippling condition. It must be embarrassing to go into a store knowing that you will have to humble yourself to ask for help do so something as simple as get a product off the top shelf. :tongue:
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