07-05-2013, 03:59 AM
Anonymous Wrote:Well today was good I guess, I learnt a few things and said quite a lot too.
I’ve started to see the councillor at the Sanctuary this morning and we talked for an hour about all my worries and childhood memories. We still have a lot more to talk about on the next appointment next week.
I got to write down what I remember of what happened and dates, names and even what they did to me and other kids. I'm a little scarred to do that but I have a week to do it though.
The councilor thinks I am very vulnerable as I’m very open to people and way to nice for my own good. She said that makes me very open to abuse by men that just want to use me.
She told me a lot of guys in my situation end up in prostitution, strangely I have thought of that a few times in the last month. I didn’t tell her that though but was strange that she said about it though. I think I been put on some sort of list for vulnerable people too, but not sure as I thought got what she said.
It was nice to get most of it out in the open though, I feel a lot better though. But I still have to write down what I remember
THAT fast?!?!?! :eek:
Any and all therapists I went to see about my plethora of abuses I received went through more recent life stuff (my typical day, how am I feeling about current events - that sort of thing) and go to know who I am as a person now before delving into the deep dark ancient history of my past. 2-3 sometimes more sessions would be dedicated to the whole 'getting to know you' before the therapists would start asking me to tell them about the long past.
IDK this just 'feels' wrong to me. Why the list? Why other kids? That doesn't set right - this should be about you and only you, not anyone else.
Are you certain this is a therapist, a psychologist, or is this a police person who is seeking 'evidence' to prosecute and find other victims?
IF you are not comfortable talking about this stuff from the long past, I strongly suggest you tell this person to stop going there.
Whatever happened to you you most likely kept under wraps for a long time - that means you have to be 100% comfortable with whoever you tell these sorts of details too. I seriously doubt you are 100% comfortable with a complete stranger and are fully ready to start dredging the past.
Therapy is not a race, it isn't supposed to be done rapidly, it isn't supposed to through you back into the past until the therapist is pretty darn certain she/he ain't going to trigger you or do further psychological harm.
From your description here, this individual is pushing you way too hard, way to fast and doesn't appear to be cognizant of the potential dangers and risks to your emotional and mental well being.
Who is this person? What is their qualifications? Are you really ready to sit down and dig up the ancient past and look at it closely?
While I have had therapists have me make lists, those lists dealt with how I felt about things, not a list of other people involved.
I didn't even have to give my mother's or fathers name to a therapist and none - not a single one, ever asked for that sort of data.
When I was doing post domestic violence counseling, the therapist even said that I did not have to give any names unless I wanted too.
So this situation is very odd to me - very unsettling, and doesn't appear to have your best interests in mind.
Do be very, very careful.
That fear you have is a healthy fear in this case, listen to it. You do not HAVE to do anything a therapist suggests. DO ask questions as to 'why' when they do something that causes you fear, anxiety, sadness or any feeling. DO insist on taking it slowly and dealing with things piecemeal if you need it that way.
How can this therapist know you are vulnerable? Based on how many session is this 'diagnoses' being made? If you have less than 4 I would be very wary of anything she tells you is 'wrong' with you.
Something isn't right here.