Questions on my Think Box...

[Sylph]

Hey Sis, I have a few questions, that I seriously want the answer to. I'm doing a bit of reflecting and am genuinely curious. Let's check childish-ness at the door and keep it Academic

1) Why do "Masculine" Gay Men find feminine terms and nicknames offensive?

2) Why do people in general find "Vulgar" Words to be rude, even when used in general conversation with no connotation?

3) Why do people care what people think of them and change for them?

4) Why is it seen as unattractive to be Feminine(Males)

5) Why do Guys think that Lesbians want them? (Seriously)

6) Why do Gay men in general have to be "a guy" in order to be deemed relatable to other gay men? (This one irks me alot)

I have more, but these are the ones I really want to know right now. And yes a good majority are about Gay and feminine issues, cause I really want to know. Not just "it's unattractive" or "I want a man, not a woman", because both those statements are opinions and not facts, and while entitled to them as you are, they are unfairly perpetuated in this community.

I just want some indepth answers, cause I will be honest, I love all you hoes, but I feel ostracized and I want no pity or sympathy, I just want to know.

Now let me have it Bitches I can either like it and/or accept it or dislike and/or not accept it.

[MisterTinkles]

1) Why do "Masculine" Gay Men find feminine terms and nicknames offensive?
[COLOR="Purple"]Not all of them do. Ive heard a LOT of "butch" guys using "girl" many times.
For the ones that find it "offensive", they probably dont want to be considered "gay", or rather "faggy", because they try so hard to be "macho" and "manly"...when in fact, they are nothing but another stereotypical gay/fag/homo.
Fucked up, huh?[/COLOR]

2) Why do people in general find "Vulgar" Words to be rude, even when used in general conversation with no connotation?
Because thats the way society has made itself. ALWAYS find SOMETHING to bitch, whine, and complain about. These people are morons, because THEY are the ones who use "vulgar" language the most....they just want YOU think they are SOOOOOO precious and perfect, because they have such fucked up self images and complexes.

3) Why do people care what people think of them and change for them?
This depends on the person, their mentality, frame of mind, and vanity/shallowness factor. There are too many answers for this, to go into it.

4) Why is it seen as unattractive to be Feminine(Males)
In general there still are stereotypes for "men" and "women". Women can still get away with being "manly" and nobody really says anything...but men being feminine or "petite", thats still a double standard.

5) Why do Guys think that Lesbians want them? (Seriously)
For the same reasons that straight women think gay men want them....we "secretly" want them to "turn us straight".

6) Why do Gay men in general have to be "a guy" in order to be deemed relatable to other gay men? (This one irks me alot)
Im a "guy" guy. I have NEVER been able to relate to other gay men. Except for two or three, but thats about it. From what I have seen and heard, you arent "relatable" unless youre into some kind of sick shit, a user/abuser, or a whore.


Does that help you out any?

[Sylph]

1) Why do "Masculine" Gay Men find feminine terms and nicknames offensive?
[COLOR="Purple"]Not all of them do. Ive heard a LOT of "butch" guys using "girl" many times.
For the ones that find it "offensive", they probably dont want to be considered "gay", or rather "faggy", because they try so hard to be "macho" and "manly"...when in fact, they are nothing but another stereotypical gay/fag/homo.
Fucked up, huh?[/COLOR]

2) Why do people in general find "Vulgar" Words to be rude, even when used in general conversation with no connotation?
Because thats the way society has made itself. ALWAYS find SOMETHING to bitch, whine, and complain about. These people are morons, because THEY are the ones who use "vulgar" language the most....they just want YOU think they are SOOOOOO precious and perfect, because they have such fucked up self images and complexes.

3) Why do people care what people think of them and change for them?
This depends on the person, their mentality, frame of mind, and vanity/shallowness factor. There are too many answers for this, to go into it.

4) Why is it seen as unattractive to be Feminine(Males)
In general there still are stereotypes for "men" and "women". Women can still get away with being "manly" and nobody really says anything...but men being feminine or "petite", thats still a double standard.

5) Why do Guys think that Lesbians want them? (Seriously)
For the same reasons that straight women think gay men want them....we "secretly" want them to "turn us straight".

6) Why do Gay men in general have to be "a guy" in order to be deemed relatable to other gay men? (This one irks me alot)
Im a "guy" guy. I have NEVER been able to relate to other gay men. Except for two or three, but thats about it. From what I have seen and heard, you arent "relatable" unless youre into some kind of sick shit, a user/abuser, or a whore.


Does that help you out any?

Thanks Beh-Beh :-* these are the answers I gave myself (minus #5), but it's nice to know I'm not the only queer to think/feel this way.

I am just annoyed that being myself makes people uncomfortable or whatever. I mean, I'm not gonna change, but I was curious as to why that was :/

It's not like I'm a Pedophilic Cannibal...

[MisterTinkles]

There is a difference between just being an effeminate man, and being a fag or being faggy.

The only way you can tell what the other person thinks of you is, intelligent people know the difference.
Stupid people think they are both the same thing.

An effeminate man is just a guy with softer tones, more hand gestures, and some like you, slight speech impediments. Its not something you are doing on purpose or that you are working at becoming.....this is just how YOU are.

Being a fag or faggy is something that is worked on. You can usually tell, because a fag will be very callous, hateful, sarcastic, and bitchy most of the time...and actually acting like a woman on "the rag".

I hate fags. I dont mind soft spoken guys or effeminate men. Because I know the diff, sis.
:hugs-and-kisses-smi

[Sylph]

There is a difference between just being an effeminate man, and being a fag or being faggy.

The only way you can tell what the other person thinks of you is, intelligent people know the difference.
Stupid people think they are both the same thing.

An effeminate man is just a guy with softer tones, more hand gestures, and some like you, slight speech impediments. Its not something you are doing on purpose or that you are working at becoming.....this is just how YOU are.

Being a fag or faggy is something that is worked on. You can usually tell, because a fag will be very callous, hateful, sarcastic, and bitchy most of the time...and actually acting like a woman on "the rag".

I hate fags. I dont mind soft spoken guys or effeminate men. Because I know the diff, sis.
:hugs-and-kisses-smi

Oh Tinks you big ol' Queer, sometimes you can get on my last gay ass nerve, but sometimes you make my teeth ache your so sweet! :3

However I embrace being a Fag though, just not the callous or hateful parts. Gotta admit I'm a bitch sometimes .

And who you Callin Sis Brah, I ain't your Sis man, we boys (My "tough guy" voice )

[MisterTinkles]

HA! Brahsis!

I've heard you speak in your videos.....you aint no fag.
You CAN be a Queen Bitch....but thats just cause its FUN!!!

[Sylph]

HA! Brahsis!

I've heard you speak in your videos.....you aint no fag.
You CAN be a Queen Bitch....but thats just cause its FUN!!!

Hmmm...seems you need to be educated on QueenOdi 101 :p

"Class, The Bitch is now in session"

[MisterTinkles]

(30 seconds later)

Class over.....cause there wasnt anything to learn!!!!

[KawaiiKitty]

1) Why do "Masculine" Gay Men find feminine terms and nicknames offensive?

It associates them with something that they dont like or feel uncomfortable being thought of as. Its like calling a black guy a "lazy, n-word." Maybe not that racially charged but still youre associating them with something that they dont find is a positive influence in society.

2) Why do people in general find "Vulgar" Words to be rude, even when used in general conversation with no connotation?

Im not sure what you mean by vulgar words, if you just mean curse words in general then I dont know why people have a problem with those. If youre talking about racially motivated vulgar words then I can totally see why they feel this way even if there is no connotation made. To use those words are very disrespectful to the people who have had them used on them in a hostile environment. Again using the N word as an example - you might feel empowered by that word but there have been black people that have endured hearing that word while theyve been beaten, hung, and killed.

Also I feel like some words ALWAYS carry connotations with them. When someone runs into a theatre and yells, "FIRE!" Do you automatically think they are talking about forest fires in some tropical jungle thousands of miles away? No the connotation is that there is fire nearby and you need to get out of the movie theatre. Some words always carry that kind of connotation. Words like n****r and f*g and f****t and s**c and g**k always carry those kinds of connotations due to the centuries of use as a negative word. Words that are used to incite fear in and violence against those they are used on and used against.

3) Why do people care what people think of them and change for them?

Thats just how society has always been. You dont want the Joneses down the street thinking poorly of you. Its one of those irrational things we do to keep our good standing in whatever community we think we belong to.

I also think it links back to our more primal urges to socialize within our "pack" so that we arent cast out and have to fend for ourselves. If our other "packmates" think we are too different from them then they might not want to socialize with us anymore. It feeds on our fight to survive instincts - to always have food/water/shelter/clothing etc.

4) Why is it seen as unattractive to be Feminine(Males)

Not to sound like a broken record here but I think it comes back to the whole natural selection thing. Im not talking about the way we think of males vs females. Im talking about the physical differences in males versus females. Most men are built with bigger/stronger muscles and most women have a caring/nurturing side of them...this is NOT to say that those roles cant be shown in the opposite sex - Im just saying generally thats the divide between male and female. These physical differences then lend to the idea that guys should be the breadwinners and females should be the homemakers. When the situation arises though I think the roles can be reversed and turned on their head as needed.

Ugh I feel like Im not explaining this correctly but maybe ppl will get the idea of what Im saying

5) Why do Guys think that Lesbians want them? (Seriously)

Im guessing you mean straight guys? Ive no idea really. I guess they look at lesbians as something to "conquer" They think, "oh she only likes girls, but if I can get her into bed that means my manliness is even greater than the idea of being a lesbian" I think its just an ego boosting thing. It could be also going back to the primal urging of wanting to mate with every female they can to prolong the life of the species but that could be stretching it a bit.

6) Why do Gay men in general have to be "a guy" in order to be deemed relatable to other gay men? (This one irks me alot)

Im really not sure what you meant by this. I think you mean why are effem men not thought of as a "guy"? Its probably they will feel like society is judging them in guilt by association. They think if you hang around with an effem gay person long enough people might think you are effem too. They could partially be right too. I dont know about you but if I spend enough time around someone I start to pick up certain mannerisms. Dunno why but Ive known other people like that too. I guess its in part as to feel like they fit in. Its a very subscious thing that I try to avoid if I catch myself doing it but I usually have to be around that person for a very long time. I know Ive picked up some of the mannerism of my bf but we live together and I think thats ok.

Hope Ive been some help Queenie dear.

PS lol Its kinda funny when I hit submit reply, it came back and told me that my reply was too short. I then realized I still had the quotes around Queenie dear's original post.

[Kiid]

1) Why do "Masculine" Gay Men find feminine terms and nicknames offensive?
Cos they are bitches

2) Why do people in general find "Vulgar" Words to be rude, even when used in general conversation with no connotation?
Cos they are bitches

3) Why do people care what people think of them and change for them?
Cos they are silly gooses

4) Why is it seen as unattractive to be Feminine(Males)
Cos people are bitches

5) Why do Guys think that Lesbians want them? (Seriously)
Cos they watch too much porn u.u

6) Why do Gay men in general have to be "a guy" in order to be deemed relatable to other gay men? (This one irks me alot)
Cos gay men in general are bitches u.u