07-22-2013, 06:12 AM
Hey all,
I've been debating a number of issues in my current relationship and truly need your advice, expertise and experience with love.
I have been with my bf for a year and 3 months now, and monogamous ( wouldnt want it any other way). I have noticed that we are hitting a plateau in terms of relationship "umff". I also am way more romantic than he is, which makes it a bit difficult for me as I am very creative, frisky, emotionally inclined....and he's more goofy and not very affectionate. Obviously he was more affectionate at first hence why I fell for him, but now its just become very routine "love yous", " miss yous" etc. He no longer surprises me, tackles me to the ground or the small things you kinda want to maintain.
I have discussed this many MANY times with him, and it results in a mild improvement for a day or 2 and back to point zero. He tells me that he is giving the most he can ... but to me being affectionate is super easy and is effortless ( as it should be in a relationship). I have always been the kind that is open about emotions and always discuss when i am down or disappointing, which recently feels like too often.
Fuck, all I want is to be loved as much as i can love and I don't know why this is difficult in this relationship. I love the guy, we live together...but i feel he isnt putting effort and it really puts a damper on my romantic side and makes me just give up on being romantic......sometimes i wonder if i am settling.
Not to toot my own horn, but I have a great career ahead of me, I am intelligent...very kind on the eyes, where am i fucking up? i just never thought that loving me might be a difficult task per se. I am easy going and for the most part flexible, but it just seems that affection in this relationship is imbalanced.
How do you deal with that in a relationship? should I give in to this supposed "normal relationship plateau? or grow balls and realize that there might be better and bigger love for me out there?
issue 2: His job entails him to work with many gay guys, all the time. I am the jealous kind and always have trouble dealing with him being close with single gay guys. He hates that about me, and I wonder how do I even fix that? ...He apparently never feels jealous cause he trusts me... but it isnt a trust thing, i just dont trust other single gay guys! I am still a student and he works a job that has a lot of traveling and over nights.
I've been debating a number of issues in my current relationship and truly need your advice, expertise and experience with love.
I have been with my bf for a year and 3 months now, and monogamous ( wouldnt want it any other way). I have noticed that we are hitting a plateau in terms of relationship "umff". I also am way more romantic than he is, which makes it a bit difficult for me as I am very creative, frisky, emotionally inclined....and he's more goofy and not very affectionate. Obviously he was more affectionate at first hence why I fell for him, but now its just become very routine "love yous", " miss yous" etc. He no longer surprises me, tackles me to the ground or the small things you kinda want to maintain.
I have discussed this many MANY times with him, and it results in a mild improvement for a day or 2 and back to point zero. He tells me that he is giving the most he can ... but to me being affectionate is super easy and is effortless ( as it should be in a relationship). I have always been the kind that is open about emotions and always discuss when i am down or disappointing, which recently feels like too often.
Fuck, all I want is to be loved as much as i can love and I don't know why this is difficult in this relationship. I love the guy, we live together...but i feel he isnt putting effort and it really puts a damper on my romantic side and makes me just give up on being romantic......sometimes i wonder if i am settling.
Not to toot my own horn, but I have a great career ahead of me, I am intelligent...very kind on the eyes, where am i fucking up? i just never thought that loving me might be a difficult task per se. I am easy going and for the most part flexible, but it just seems that affection in this relationship is imbalanced.
How do you deal with that in a relationship? should I give in to this supposed "normal relationship plateau? or grow balls and realize that there might be better and bigger love for me out there?
issue 2: His job entails him to work with many gay guys, all the time. I am the jealous kind and always have trouble dealing with him being close with single gay guys. He hates that about me, and I wonder how do I even fix that? ...He apparently never feels jealous cause he trusts me... but it isnt a trust thing, i just dont trust other single gay guys! I am still a student and he works a job that has a lot of traveling and over nights.