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09-07-2013, 06:17 PM

4 years is a heavy amount of time....it's not like surgery where you can just rip him of your head....when you are used to someone for so long it will obviously take a proportional amount of time to get over him.

The positive thing is you recognized a behaviour pattern that is not good for you or him and you're trying to overcome it...sounds to me you're on your way to coming to terms and start fresh..

Good luck!

Rawr · 09-07-2013, 06:32 PM

Perhaps text him one last time, apologize for the way you acted and maybe explain the reason for doing so. At the end, explain that you won't be doing it anymore and wish him all the best in life. End things on a positive as you may regret it if you just leave it negatively and vanish.

After, delete his contact details. Keep away from social media and perhaps find a hobby? if anything post on here more and form friendships to keep your mind away. When you have the urge to text him your happy or sad moment, post it here instead!

09-07-2013, 06:59 PM

Rawr Wrote:Perhaps text him one last time, apologize for the way you acted and maybe explain the reason for doing so. At the end, explain that you won't be doing it anymore and wish him all the best in life. End things on a positive as you may regret it if you just leave it negatively and vanish.

After, delete his contact details. Keep away from social media and perhaps find a hobby? if anything post on here more and form friendships to keep your mind away. When you have the urge to text him your happy or sad moment, post it here instead!

I like your idea of texting him back and apologizing, but I need to give it time. I have already done the apology thing before, stopped texting him for nearly a week and then started all over again. I know if I text him now, he will only think that I am trying to make contact with him again. When I feel comfortable, I may text him an apology but right now I do not think it will be taken seriously and rightfully so.

I do need to keep away from social media and find a hobby. I bought a new game for my 3ds so I should try and stick my head into that for a while. Once I get my finances straight I plan on picking up learning an instrument. I will try to learn either the piano or the guitar.

The reason I originally started coming on this website was to get support and try to communicate with others. I wanted a place where I can feel free to express myself while at the same time creating new friendships, so I will be posting on here a little more often I believe. Smile

09-07-2013, 11:36 PM

First. -Hugs-

I know it's not the same for everyone, but what helps me get over relationships more quickly is anger.

I try to concentrate really hard on his bad points and all the things that weren't right, i talk myself into how much better I am without him, I go out dancing, dancing a lot, in fact I believe dancing is magic, I dance and flirt and when I go back home alone I feel way better.

Knowing my next big story can start anytime I dim worthy.

09-07-2013, 11:38 PM

I think its time you talk to a counselor.

Since he has asked you not to contact him anymore, and you continue, that can be considered stalking.
And if you piss him off enough, he may do something legal to make you stop.

Better you go get some professional advice on this right now and put a stop to it yourself, before you end up in court.....or worse.

09-08-2013, 12:08 AM

MisterTinkles Wrote:I think its time you talk to a counselor.

Since he has asked you not to contact him anymore, and you continue, that can be considered stalking.
And if you piss him off enough, he may do something legal to make you stop.

Better you go get some professional advice on this right now and put a stop to it yourself, before you end up in court.....or worse.

oh I know, he threatened that last time he responded, saying he would consider a restraining order. I am actually going to see a therapist but I havent seen him in almost a month due to money issues

09-08-2013, 02:50 AM

darkenedshadow Wrote:oh I know, he threatened that last time he responded, saying he would consider a restraining order. I am actually going to see a therapist but I havent seen him in almost a month due to money issues

Well, call the therapist and see if he would give you a 10 minute session for a small price.
Tell him its an emergency of sorts.

Any decent doctor of any medical field will work with you on payments. And REALLY awesome ones know sometimes people need help when they cant afford it, so they give "freebies" once in a while, if they know you are a good patient to them.

Just a thought...

09-08-2013, 04:43 AM

Shadow,

I can understand your reasoning for your actions involving your ex after the breakup. You two had a lot of history and that is a big chunk of your life that changed rather suddenly. I'm glad you are finally on the path to letting him go, you deserve to be happy and someday you will be happy with another, better guy. I've talked with you before and I know you are a great guy. Take the time to be happy with yourself and someday you'll be happy with a guy in your life Smile

*hugs*

09-08-2013, 11:39 AM

4 years is a long time.

But you have to move on my friend.

That part of your life is over.

Let him move on too.

Leave him alone.

Richard

09-09-2013, 03:26 AM

Wow. Similar to me :x