My Darkest Pain, My Life

[princealbertofb]

Your story moved me to tears. My heart goes out to you and I hope you are able to come to some kind point of acceptance with yourself. Your father was weak, but you need to be strong and try and live with the horrid abuse inflicted on you.

I don't know what to say, but I had to say something as I too am a victim of rape at a young age and also suffer from depression. I feel you need to accept and move on from whats happened, and it could take years.

Hey, Serfdom, sorry to hear about this part of your history... Have you learnt to cope?

[Serfdom]

It took me a while, but I have now. It will have affected my life in ways I can't even see, but I am who I am now and have come to like myself for it.

Oddly, lots of crying, supportive friends and lots of understanding from people I've slept with has helped me.

[princealbertofb]

It took me a while, but I have now. It will have affected my life in ways I can't even see, but I am who I am now and have come to like myself for it.

Oddly, lots of crying, supportive friends and lots of understanding from people I've slept with has helped me.

It's been painful, which could explain the crying... and of course support from friends and lovers does help, but what helps most, I'm sure, is being able to voice it, to explain it and ultimately to expell it from your darkest soul. A redemption to be found in self expression. Good luck for the future and bravo for handling it as you have. mile:

[fjp999]

What interest me is how people handle the system very differently.

From my experiences... my sister believes our uncle did something to her. She really doesnt discuss the details but I have come to believe it was very minor (in my opinion) like a tap on the ass - but that is only my opinion on how deep or minor it is to an individual. For the past couple decades she brings it up almost every time his name is mentioned so I believe that it affected her pretty deeply.

I had a really crazy Europe trip... I mean really crazy Super Good and Super Bad. It started getting ALL bad at the end of the trip. One of the most minor things was being chased by some scary looking middle easterners (or maybe that was one of the good things :confused: )

On return to USA I was staying with two friends on Christopher Street. This was 1984 and NYC could be very very dangerous (and EXTREMELY exciting).It was a very very hot summer and in NYC the hot weather brings out EVERYBODY. It is not unusual to see some drugged out prostitute urinating in the middle of a busy street. Christopher Street was a very busy gay friendly street. I walked up the stairs of my friends apt and as I turned the corner to his door I noticed someone/s on the stairs above me. I put the key in the door and clicked open and was rushed by six black teens. I was never hurt but physically molested with a knife at my throat. I kinda blocked the exact molestation but have always chuckled about how sexually inexperienced they were. Just kids really out for kicks.

They stole some crap and ran out. I called the cops who arrived quickly. I told them my story and they asked me "What would you like us to do for you?" As soon as this cop said that it hit me... This happens so often there is literally nothing for them to do. DNA testing at that time was unheard of.

What really hurt is that the two friends I was staying with didnt believe me. They thought I stole their $30 and radio. One friend was very dear to me so I felt that pain more than the molestation.

I was amazed how quickly I buried everything. I love keeping super busy and dont really like having enough time to look back.

Serfdom if you are as strong as I think you are I believe that you can just let it slip off your back soon. Keep busy, have a strong desire to live life to its fullest and dont look back. That philosophy has kept me positive.

It is so important to accept yourself and like yourself