My best friene

[Sylph]

Then I could find a lgbt center but I would be nevourus to walk in

Honestly you have to do what will make you happy. Many of the people there will have gone through what you have and are currently, possibly to more or less extremes, but still have been where you are.

You can't view everything in the right here and now, I know you want to and want it to just happen and everything, but sadly things take time.

You have to be very strong in order to get where you need to in life. Fuck all the haters and people who want to put you down, this is something you must do for yourself.

You have to realize that you are worthy of happiness and love and even if it's not from your best friend in the way that you want, you are no less worthy for not getting it from him.

And I understand about the church system all too well, and to that I politely say... well I won't even, but you cannot allow people who bleed the same, cry the same and breathe the same air as you to dictate who you are, should be, where you will ultimately end up and how you should feel.

These are choices for you to make alone. I get if you want to respect the church, but I don't think the message Jesus wants to send is conform or die in hell... that's a dictator and if I'm not mistaken, God is a merciful, just and loving god to all people.

Why would he damn you for being who you are and living the life he gave you? Obviously those pastors have some skeletons in their closets if they want to degrade and dehumanize you.

Shame on them, not you.

[Blackie]

So what else should I do guys like honestly i feel like theres a hole in my heart without him

[Sylph]

So what else should I do guys like honestly i feel like theres a hole in my heart without him

Really, getting help emotionally is all that you can do, especially in the event that he doesn't return the same feelings...

I know how bad you want this, I can see that, but unfortunately, you can make him like/love you in that way if he doesn't and it wouldn't be fair of you to force him or make him feel guilty.

Sometimes in life, hard choices have to be made, even at 16, and although you don't want to make them and would rather the easy way for things to happen, you have to push on even when it feels like your being split in two.

It's not emotionally or psychologically healthy to be so attached to him, but I can get why, I really can, but take it from me, I'm not just bull shittin, you will regret it if he doesn't return your feelings and even if he does, people grow and change and although you guys are ride or die friends/potential boyfriends now and I don't wish ill, you may grow apart in some aspects of your lives.

I hope you don't, but people get jobs, go to schools, have experiences, have failures, things change and while we wish things could stay the same, they change sadly.

I think you need to emotionally secure yourself now, so that later on, whether it be a week or month or whenever, you won't be hurt in that instance.

I really want to tell you he will swoop you up in his arms and marry you and lock you down and just be perfect, but I want you to grasp the reality of what this type of situation can result in.

Just sit down, have a cry, shout, scream, let the fucks fly, do what you need to, to get the angst and hurt off your chest and then think for real like, not what you want, but what the deal is now, where you see yourself and him, how would you go about living your lives beyond high school, and also prepare yourself in the event he just doesn't feel the same.

And who knows, many gay guys take time to mature and accept themselves and what not, he may not even be ready now, or is unsure or even scared and will need time to work out his feelings, getting girlfriends in the mean time for these reasons, so don't view today as the "this is it"/"all or nothing" moment.

And if he truly is Straight, then you may honestly just have to settle for being close friends or Bros or whatever you call yourselves.

I really hope you can understand, I don't want to tell you what it is I think you want to hear, because I would be lying...

[Blackie]

I giess your right. It just like why ive never liked anyone like this before I mean ever ever and then its not right for me its like why bother ho estly better off just watching pirn with the worsr actors man it just sucks

[Sylph]

I giess your right. It just like why ive never liked anyone like this before I mean ever ever and then its not right for me its like why bother ho estly better off just watching pirn with the worsr actors man it just sucks

It will get better over time, it'll be hard, but that corny saying it get's better, actually is true.

Leave all these but's and why's and stuff behind just focus ahead. Those types of words will only hold you back.


I still miss my friend, literally everyday, but I am grateful for our time together and the memories I have. I'm not sad, but actually happy.

I was lucky enough to have a friend like him.

Take everyday for what it is. It don't feel like it, but life actually does go on.

[Blackie]

Dang this suck though whyyy

[ManicReptile21]

listen to me. Follow your heart and when you are given the chance dont chicken out and run away with your tail between your legs. be strong and honest forever and never make any regrets about trying to be who you are. when college comes around everyone drops the act and start the real world where college funding and jobs destroy them. their opinions will be the last thing they care about. if you have a reputation let it get destroyed because once college hits all reputations disitigrate. a reputation isnt going to get you that job you really want. its going to be honesty and a strong will. you probably go to sleep scared and confused. dont ever deny yourself the c hance to be happy or you may regret it for the rest of your life.

[Bowyn Aerrow]

Wow there is a lot of things there.

Alright. Since you had gay sex three times and apparently didn't NOT like it enough to not do it again, then chances are pretty darn high you are gay.

The fact that your buddy allows you to get under him to get warm tells me he has a lot of feelings for you which are atypical of the 'straight' condition.

If he allows this much closeness then he already has strong feelings for you. I think you are pretty safe in telling him that you like him a lot more than just like, and tell him you love him in a way.

As for being gay and playing football. Please. I'm gay and played football, softball, hardball and even basketball. I also hunted, camped, back backed, fished and did other decidedly 'manly' crap. The only reason why I don't play sports now is because I have a herniated disk in my neck and being tackled could possibly lead to my being paralyzed from the neck down or dead. Gay didn't stop me from enjoying sports.

Its ok to be gay - really it is.

God has no problem with the gay. If He did then Canada would have been reduced to steamy ruble when it passed national gay marriage into law in 2005.

As for Church - there are plenty of Gay Affirming Christian Churches in the world: http://www.gaychurch.org/find_a_church/ is a search engine, input your town/city and get a list.

Gays and the bible: http://www.gaychurch.org/homosexuality-and-the-bible/ - there is a lot of stuff there - basically what 'traditional' churches have been preaching all of these years on the gay is wrong.

Just like they were wrong about women being property, just like they were wrong in accusing the Jews of killing Jesus and causing the Jews to be hated for centuries, just like they were wrong to justify slavery and segregation for so many centuries. churches are fallible (able to make errors).

God however isn't fallible, He does not create mistakes - therefore you, me and every other LGBT person in the world is not a mistake.

As for your buddy - eventually you are going to have to have a talk with him. You are going to have to come clean and tell him how you feel and take the risk of rejection.

You cannot make him love you back or have the same feelings. You cannot continue living a lie and using him to fulfill your emotional needs either.

Yes there is a good chance he will say 'no', he may reject you, may even run screaming for the hills - in all things in life there are risks and learning how to overcome our fear and accept the risks and take chances is what living is about.

Lets say you are gay. Right now you are 16 - you have two years before you are an adult. Before you are out on your own and not beholden to anyone for a life. You can be gay and keep it a secret for a while. It is very reasonable.

Life in general sucks a lot.... There are lot of sucky situations, a lot of risks - however there is balanced out with a good deal of joy, love and other good things, thus the sucky parts are not as bad as you may think.

I will guarantee you this, you will be ok.

[Blackie]

So I shoild just come clean. To him straight out but how

[Blackie]

Thing is i don't want to lose my bestbfriend