Hi everyone I'm Alan

[boimcrazy]

Hi Guys, My name is Alan,
Just the high points. I have known I was attracted to both girls and guys since I was in the 5th grade. I have always had a preference for guys but for multiple reasons I decided to live my life as a straight man. I wanted the typical American dream. You know; a house with the white picket fence, two cars a dog and 2.3 children. Children were what I wanted most.
I was scared when I was young and afraid my friends and family would find out about my attraction to men. Although I did experiment with homosexuality before I was married, my want for children, and a “normal” lifestyle outweighed my want for a gay relationship. However, I always felt like something was missing.
In November of 2012 after 22 years of marriage, my wife and I separated, and in March of 2013, she filed for divorce.
Well, I decided since I had lived most of my life as a straight man and had what I wanted, “A Child” perhaps it was time to enjoy the rest of me.
So here I am Guys, locked and loaded but, extremely ignorant about what it means to be gay in today’s world. Therefore, I am here to make friends, ask questions, and get advice.
Thanks in advance for being there.
Alan

[Memby]

Hey Alan, I'm sorry to hear about your divorce. On the plus side, welcome to your new lease of life.

Now, go get them boys, tiger!

[partis]

hi alan, welcome to gs, if you figure out what it means to be gay in todays world can u let me know :p

[nfisher1226]

Your life story mirrors mine somewhat, except your marriage lasted somewhat longer.

There's both similarities and differences between the relationships you might have had with women, and those you may have with men. I personally find it easier in a lot of ways since there doesn't seem to be so much of the confusion that women can throw a man's way. When I'm with a guy I feel like we have an easier time understanding each other.

On the negative side, there are a lot of players out there and a lot of guys who will tell you what you want to hear just so they can get into your bed, or get you into theirs, only to throw you away afterwards. Be careful.

I've also had some difficulty finding a guy who can relate to the fact that I'm a father and is willing to accept some of the limitations on my time that come with that. Currently I'm dating another single dad though. It's great, and I really like him, but the downside is we have so little time to spend together. We tend to get short windows of a couple hours here and there to hurry up and spend some time together. That may or may not apply to you because you haven't said how old your child(ren?) is/are.

Mostly though, relationships can follow the same patterns that you might be used to.

Anyway, welcome.

[mbennet35]

Welcome to GS!

[boimcrazy]

Thanks for the warm welcome guys. My kid will be 21 on new years eve. she knows about me and accepts it without question.

[Woollyhats]

Hello...You remind me of my boyfriend, in that he knew he could like men, but wanted a regular family, until he met me and realised he could adopt kids if he so choose....

I think that relationship wise, straight and gay relationships can be similar... you have the real relationships, the fuck buddy relationships, basically everything a straight couple can do... so that's not going to change.

It might change in that some people will be wary of you, as people are still wary of gay people sometimes. A small number of people will have nothing to do with you as they're homophobic, but you likely wouldn't like these people anyway - they tend to be stupid/ or the prissy propy people that need to look perfect.

Your life might actually not change that much... being at your age you don't need to worry quite as much about telling people who have power over you (parents), so you get to skip a lot of the most stressful bits.

Oh, last note: While you're open to men now, don't close off the possibility of being with another woman, in case you find a woman you feel you could love.

[Miles]

Welcome to gs Alan

[Waylon777]

Welcome to GS!

[ShyGamer4012]

Hey Alan, welcome to GS!