I came out (?)

[mbennet35]

It is so "easy" for a straight christian male to say that sex with another man is a SIN........ It's easy because they are heterosexuals and therefor not affected by it. What's worse, is they don't accept the fact that gays, lesbians, and bisexuals are born this way. They depend on a 2000 year old book to explain the intricacies of human nature. Back then, they knew next to nothing about what makes nature tick.

We've come a long way since then, and they need to update that old, antiquated religious book.

I wouldn't have anything else to do with him either. He will always be trying to convince you that having sex with a man is a sin,,, and that you need to marry a woman. I'd become friends with him again - if he made a "choice" to not believe everything he was taught concerning what that antiquated book says.

God, deliver us from your followers.

Jim

People like to take the Bible out of context. And only choose parts of it that they think repersent their beliefs.

They totally ignore the parst about God being loving and forgivng. God doenst want anyone to die or go to hell.

The people who say "God wants gays to die" are in for a rude awakening when they come face to face with God. Just saying.


Edit* I am also not condeming anyone who doesnt believe God. That is your belief and I respect that just like I hope you will respect my beliefs in God.

[nfisher1226]

Yes out of context and cherry picked all to hell. The only verses in the bible that deal with homosexuality at all are concerning old Abrahamic law, which Jesus explicitly said was no longer in effect, and certain passages by Jesus' disciples, but not by Jesus himself. Funny how they never manage to put those facts together when saying gays are going to hell.

I've dealt with trying to reconcile religion and my sexuality for my entire adult life. I can say a few things quite confidently based on my own experience. You cannot pray the gay away. Marrying a woman will not turn you straight. Having kids with that woman will still not turn you straight. Doing all of these things together for years will not affect your sexuality in the least. If you happen to be gay, it's just not something you're going to change through any actions of your own.

Further, for guys like this who want you to marry a woman, how low can you get from the standpoint of what that's going to do not only to you but to the woman? Why bring some (presumably) innocent woman into the grand experiment of trying to "fix" your sexuality? Doesn't a straight woman have a right to expect that the man she marries is, in fact, straight himself? Why would this person want you to tear some woman's life apart even if it's presumably for your own good? Say you had a terminal disease, and you had the power to cure yourself by giving your disease to someone else. Would that be moral? The whole concept is utter bullshit and I'm sure you know it.

Southbiochem, I can tell from your posts that you're confident about who you are even though you're obviously hurting and struggling to find the courage to come out. So here's my advice in a nutshell. Who you come out to is your decision and if you're not ready then you're not ready. But now you have this guy to deal with on some level. He knows, and he could possibly out you, or he could just pop up from time to time to let you know he's praying for your soul and try to convert you back to a hetero life, annoying the crap out of you in the process. He has no right to do this. It's going to at the very least make you uncomfortable, and it's likely going to be borderline harassment (I've experienced it before myself). You owe it to yourself to make it clear to him that this is a subject that is not up for further discussion, to you or to anyone else. Don't leave him any wiggle room either. I personally wouldn't even acknowledge his niceness, but that's me. I'd be blunt and to the point, and make it clear the dialog was closed.

You have this forum as a place to talk openly about your sexuality, but I really think you need someone you can talk to face to face about it too. And by that I mean someone more appropriate than this guy; someone who is not going to be judgemental about it. Once I voiced the words out loud to someone and could stop hiding, even if it was to only one person, you can't imagine how much better it felt. Even if it's only to a therapist it might be good for you.

[Sylph]

Gurl in my relatively short life, I've learned 2 things early on;

1) People will talk about you till the day you die and after, no matter what you do, so take less worth a salt grain, ignore ignorance, let bitches rotate on sand papered dildos and have a good day ^.^

2) Your life is yours to live and live the way that makes you happy, so long as you aren't hurting anyone, you should be able to do what you like within reasonable limits(I.E Don't run down the road naked -.- ... gurl please).


I was picked on so hard in School, being where I'm from, being so flamboyant from kid days, all the religion here, gurl I just have to tell bitches to shut up they face as I proceed to not give any of my shits.

Grew up in a tough neighborhood, was told I was a maama's boy(Gay), because I looked too much like my mother and had too much of my mother's blood in me. Kay cool, moved on.

Went to church for a try, told me to basically fuck off promptly and to try back later, and gurl best thing church ever did for me you dun kno!!! Praise Jah

Was flamboyant in school in a predominantly black/west indian peer group, got teased a lot, made some good friends, got a lot of emotional trauma, kay I moved on.

Now, I'm so much stronger for the faults in my life. It's not easy I won't lie, but gurl, you need to take what this guy says to you, and brush it off your shoulder, aink got no time for dirt.

No offense to Christians or whatever you may be, I have my beliefs, non of which are religious in the modern sense of the term and no less good or better, but gurl, to even force your views/opinions on someone else like this, deserves a nice link up with my ass as you promptly kiss it.

I've had enough personally of all the negative chat coming my way, so I just don't got time for it.

I say to you the same, because in the end, they don't pay your bills, buy your clothes or clean your house, so until they put a ring on your finger, they can kindly tek wit dem selves, if they got something negative to say.

Just my opinion. Again no offense gurls, but Odi & the Church aren't aces :\ . It's cute or whatever, but gurlllll

[stu]

Never mind at least your not as fucked up as your friend!

[Bowyn Aerrow]

Don't hate the man, hate the religion.

[Waylon777]

The second person that I've ever come out to was a straight Christian guy. He and I were really really good friends in high school, but the moment I came out, he told me, "Oh, I shouldn't have been friends with then." and that just ended our 3 years worth of great friendship. Some people can turn you down really hard, but you can't let them get to you.

[mbennet35]

I came out to my pastors daughter awhile ago. I was expecting the you are going to hell speech but the first thing she asked me was

"Does this mean you will go clothes shopping with me"

hahaha

[Bowyn Aerrow]

Contemplating the original post....

Considering how not too long ago being LGBT was a condemned to hell, do not pass go, do not collect $200 sort of thing, the sheer idea that he has this 'hate the sin, not the sinner' attitude is a fairly large step in the right direction.

Furthermore, he is trying to balance out his reality with that of his church. Give him an A for effort. Its not his fault he was raised in this belief system.

Considering he kinda guessed and didn't preach at you means he is trying to be a friend, and understanding as much as he can be.

[southbiochem]

I know Bowyn, he in fact is a fairly decent guy...

I however I'm not in a position to have what little confidence I have being crushed by religious frenzy coming from someone I cared about, and I'm afraid he's not going to drop it...

I know it's selfish cause other than that little bit he's done nothing wrong...

But I looked at it this way:

I never let my hatred for religion come in the way of the 2 of us..I didn't refuse nor replied to anything when he went all Bilble guy on me...

I will never like his delusional frenzy but I didn't let that affect the relationship...I just stayed quiet and didn't argue...

I expected, naively, that he would do the same..stay quiet and not argue.......I don't expect him to ever be Ok with it, nor do I really give a shit if he does, cause it's my life...but he can't shut up about women and God, the Bible and hell and my soul and...

I don't need that shit...I don't need to stay and listen to it..I have the choice to walk away, and I'm exercizing it...

If he ever shuts up about it even if he's not OK with it...then, I'll consider resuming the friendship or whatever

[nfisher1226]

Atta boy. I'm glad you're standing up for yourself. I think you have it exactly right.