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This guy finally struck a conversation with me— where should I go with this?
#11
starbelly Wrote:Ha, see, that's what worries me, and I don't want to make an already touchy situation horribly awkward. The ambiguity is awful. Since he's been the one whose made all these apparent advances on me, he very well might come out and say what his intentions are at some point, so I'm going to see what happens. He hasn't seemed to let up.

Well, I have always found that trying to make a joke out of it somehow helps it not seem like a direct attack on their personalities.

Kind of ask questions like:
"I dont guess your momma hugged you enough as a kid". When he asks why do you say that, then you can say "well, you are super huggy touchy and friendly". And then see what he says. If he gets pissy or looks hurt, then you can say "I was just joking with you".

Well, something to that effect anyway.
Thats what works for me.
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#12
starbelly Wrote:This is true. I'm such a wimp though. I was actually on the phone with my brother when the guy started talking to me, and I sat the phone down. When I left and picked it back up, my brother, who had heard the conversation, was like "Dude… you need to talk to that guy." I guess that's reassuring(?)

Nah… I don’t believe you. You are a strong, confident guy capable of doing anything you set your mind to. Now seize the opportunity when it comes around again and let life flow.

Do it, because if you fail to reciprocate the guy may feel you are uninterested and move on.

Confidence dude, confidence. You are worth it! Your brother is right! Cupid just might be flinging arrow after arrow at you; what does he have to do, smack you on the back of your head with the bow? Just remember, you have many people holding your hand…
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#13
If your both catching the same train, why not also catch a coffee together, and just take things from there Smile

Simples.

ObW
X
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#14
starbelly Wrote:"hey, i think you're cute, let's go on a date".

omg just say that!!!
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#15
Jovial Wrote:Nah… I don’t believe you. You are a strong, confident guy capable of doing anything you set your mind to. Now seize the opportunity when it comes around again and let life flow.

Do it, because if you fail to reciprocate the guy may feel you are uninterested and move on.

Confidence dude, confidence. You are worth it! Your brother is right! Cupid just might be flinging arrow after arrow at you; what does he have to do, smack you on the back of your head with the bow? Just remember, you have many people holding your hand…

I've wondered that too, so I'm definitely gonna take the opportunity next time I see him outside of his job to actually talk to him, which will probably be next Tuesday night. Based on how forward he's been toward me, I'm 99% sure he'll be the one to come up to me or initiate conversation though. I don't know what his apparent fascination exactly is, but we'll see how it goes. It seems like he's been progressively more forward to me as time has gone on, so I'm kind of waiting for him to come out and say what he wants since he's been the aggressor in the situation.
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#16
Conversation is highly underrated. It's absolutely the best way to initiate a friendship and also a relationship. You've got the ice broken already, which is the hard part. So man, just run with it and make sure you ask plenty of questions about him, maintain eye contact, let a hug linger for a bit. I imagine you'll both get it figured out at some point.

At some point though, one or both of you may have to be a bit more bold. You might find a way to casually suggest hanging out sometime, and if so run with it. But if it seems like the point is not getting across, then the more direct approach has it's benefits.

I tend to think these types of relationships, that just evolve naturally, have a better chance than the ones starting with a personal ad or a bar meetup. So honestly I'm happy for you, and best of luck!
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#17
nfisher1226 Wrote:Conversation is highly underrated. It's absolutely the best way to initiate a friendship and also a relationship. You've got the ice broken already, which is the hard part. So man, just run with it and make sure you ask plenty of questions about him, maintain eye contact, let a hug linger for a bit. I imagine you'll both get it figured out at some point.

At some point though, one or both of you may have to be a bit more bold. You might find a way to casually suggest hanging out sometime, and if so run with it. But if it seems like the point is not getting across, then the more direct approach has it's benefits.

I tend to think these types of relationships, that just evolve naturally, have a better chance than the ones starting with a personal ad or a bar meetup. So honestly I'm happy for you, and best of luck!

Thanks a bunch. And I absolutely agree with you; for me conversation is EVERYTHING. If I can have a solid and halfway meaningful conversation with someone, then they're a keeper in my book. He seems like a smart and articulate guy.

About the relationship evolution thing, I agree on that too. It's just that those things don't often happen and I'm constantly re-evaluating the situation or am skeptical of it; for some reason I have trouble with the idea of someone being interested in ME, which goes back to self-esteem issues I think. On top of that he's RIDICULOUSLY adorable, so I second-guess myself even more and treat it as if it were a "too good to be true" situation, probably as a defense mechanism. His boldness has seemed to grow though, because I waited for several months for him actually strike a whole conversation with me and he finally did. I got the feeling he wanted to say more, but couldn't, maybe because he was nervous and/or because he was working.
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#18
Still a better love story..
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#19
I agree that relationships don't start this way often. I would say they should start this way more often. In particular, just due to the more limited numbers and the fact that people don't carry signs saying "GAY" it's more rare for gays to meet casually this way than for straights. But it's far from impossible.

Self awareness is a great step in the right direction for anyone. You seem aware of some self esteem issues. That's a good first step in changing them, because as much as we like to tell people to be themselves it's not going to do a person any good to feel unworthy. You're worth it man. Go find happiness.
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