12-31-2013, 09:11 PM
I think it was Sillboy86 made a comment about never finding the right guy in Italy.....which brought up a good point.
Who is to say that your "Mr. Right/Mrs. Right" is in the area you live? Or even the state you live? Or even the country you live????
Although technology has connected the entire planet, people still force themselves to be localized to their own areas.
Some people CAN find someone in their city/state/country, while others find it in other parts of the planet.
Can we all travel the world? No. It is expensive and time consuming, as well as some people do not like to travel.
Some people do travel the globe and still never find the right person.
The point is, if you DONT get out of your localized area (or comfort zone), you will never be out there, in public, where you are able to meet others, or have them see you.
Whether you get out to other cities in your state, travel to other states, or even go to other countries.....you HAVE to "get out there" if you plan to find someone, or be available for someone to find you.
Not everybody goes onto dating sites. To tell the truth, you only have three types of people that get on dating sites......
1. Lookers - they join, but have no intention of trying to connect with anyone, for whatever reason.
2. The Desperate - those who are desperate for finding someone, and willing to lie to themselves and tell themselves whatever they need too, in order to attract another.
3. The Players - those who get on the sites for nothing more than sex encounters. They will say and do anything to get you to submit to them. Once they get what they wanted, they are done with you.
Although technology has connected the world, the world has not connected with itself. People can lie to themselves all they want, they can allow others to lie to them, they can force themselves to believe what is said to them so they have SOMETHING in a graspable range. But the hard fact remains, people TRUST physical nature of others.
Physical Nature - means what you hear, see, and can touch for yourself, in REAL life.
Not online, not in emails, not in letters, not on "dating sites".
You can fool yourself all you want, but nothing is going to happen online. It's just "all talk". You have to meet, talk, see, interact with people in a physical presence for you to feel any sort of trust.
Im not saying you are going to trust them with your life or anything, I mean they have your trusts in that they cant lie about their photo, because you see them in real life. They can't lie to you as they would online, because you see their facial expressions and hear the tones in their voices (although a lot of them are good at lying).
It's the physical nature of getting to know someone. Talking to their face, hearing their real voice, and the feeling you get from being around them.
You've got to GET OUT and GO! Whether its the next town, the next city, the next state, or the next country......you have got to get out and GO someplace!!!! If not, you will be stagnated in your "comfort zone" and get depressed.
Look at it like this..........
When you loose something and cant find it, it's always in the last place you look?
Well, you LOOKED and you LOOKED, but you finally found that lost item.
Think of the item as the man/woman that could possibly make you happy. Think of your house or apartment as "everywhere" you looked for that item.
You looked in more than one place, you looked in different spots, you looked here and there, and sometimes you have to turn everything upside down to find that item.
But it was worth it in the end, because you found the item.
So, get out there and LOOK in other places! Turn your city, state, country upside down to get yourself out there meeting people!!!!
You aren't going to find what you are looking for if you dont get out and look.
The internet is ONLY a tool. It is not a dating service, it is not a crystal ball for your future, it is not the truth, it is not the perfect means to justify sitting on your ass.
Mr. Right/Mrs. Right isn't going to come to YOU, YOU have to go find THEM. Or at least put yourself in a position where they can SEE you. Nobody can SEE you sitting all alone in your home.
Fly, drive, take the train, take the bus, go with friends, take vacations, go on weekends out of town.....if YOU dont look, then nobody will ever SEE you.
*******************************************************
The other problem is that this is an "instant" society. Does not matter where you are from, it's all become and instant society.
Want some soup? Open a can and heat it up.
Want a burger and fries? Go through the drive thru.
Want new pants? Go to the store and get a pair.
Its all instant. Instant gratification. That does not happen with relationships. Even "love at first sight" doesnt happen over night. And those who do practice "instant relationships" are never happy, never content, never appreciative of what they have.
I call it the "Kleenex mentality" (Kleenex is a tissue company who make boxes of instant tissues).
The Kleenex Mentality - Pull out one, use it, throw it away, pull out another one.
Too many people believe that relationships/romance/love is an instant item, just waiting for them to pull it out of thin air or the internet.
They find someone that physically pleases them, and then finds out they have nothing in common, so they "throw them away" and grab another. These types of people are never happy, never concerned with anyone else s needs but their own. And as long as whoever the poor sap is they are with is not instantly making THEM happy, they will get rid of them and get another.
People are NOT instant, nor are they living next door to you for your convenience.
It is YOUR job to get yourself out there and get to know people, not theirs. After all, you never know who you are going to meet. You could be passing up your best friend in all the world, or ignoring the perfect person for you, all because you are expecting everything to come to you while you hide in your little world.
Whatever it is you want in your life............It ain't gonna happen if YOU don't work at it!!!
Who is to say that your "Mr. Right/Mrs. Right" is in the area you live? Or even the state you live? Or even the country you live????
Although technology has connected the entire planet, people still force themselves to be localized to their own areas.
Some people CAN find someone in their city/state/country, while others find it in other parts of the planet.
Can we all travel the world? No. It is expensive and time consuming, as well as some people do not like to travel.
Some people do travel the globe and still never find the right person.
The point is, if you DONT get out of your localized area (or comfort zone), you will never be out there, in public, where you are able to meet others, or have them see you.
Whether you get out to other cities in your state, travel to other states, or even go to other countries.....you HAVE to "get out there" if you plan to find someone, or be available for someone to find you.
Not everybody goes onto dating sites. To tell the truth, you only have three types of people that get on dating sites......
1. Lookers - they join, but have no intention of trying to connect with anyone, for whatever reason.
2. The Desperate - those who are desperate for finding someone, and willing to lie to themselves and tell themselves whatever they need too, in order to attract another.
3. The Players - those who get on the sites for nothing more than sex encounters. They will say and do anything to get you to submit to them. Once they get what they wanted, they are done with you.
Although technology has connected the world, the world has not connected with itself. People can lie to themselves all they want, they can allow others to lie to them, they can force themselves to believe what is said to them so they have SOMETHING in a graspable range. But the hard fact remains, people TRUST physical nature of others.
Physical Nature - means what you hear, see, and can touch for yourself, in REAL life.
Not online, not in emails, not in letters, not on "dating sites".
You can fool yourself all you want, but nothing is going to happen online. It's just "all talk". You have to meet, talk, see, interact with people in a physical presence for you to feel any sort of trust.
Im not saying you are going to trust them with your life or anything, I mean they have your trusts in that they cant lie about their photo, because you see them in real life. They can't lie to you as they would online, because you see their facial expressions and hear the tones in their voices (although a lot of them are good at lying).
It's the physical nature of getting to know someone. Talking to their face, hearing their real voice, and the feeling you get from being around them.
You've got to GET OUT and GO! Whether its the next town, the next city, the next state, or the next country......you have got to get out and GO someplace!!!! If not, you will be stagnated in your "comfort zone" and get depressed.
Look at it like this..........
When you loose something and cant find it, it's always in the last place you look?
Well, you LOOKED and you LOOKED, but you finally found that lost item.
Think of the item as the man/woman that could possibly make you happy. Think of your house or apartment as "everywhere" you looked for that item.
You looked in more than one place, you looked in different spots, you looked here and there, and sometimes you have to turn everything upside down to find that item.
But it was worth it in the end, because you found the item.
So, get out there and LOOK in other places! Turn your city, state, country upside down to get yourself out there meeting people!!!!
You aren't going to find what you are looking for if you dont get out and look.
The internet is ONLY a tool. It is not a dating service, it is not a crystal ball for your future, it is not the truth, it is not the perfect means to justify sitting on your ass.
Mr. Right/Mrs. Right isn't going to come to YOU, YOU have to go find THEM. Or at least put yourself in a position where they can SEE you. Nobody can SEE you sitting all alone in your home.
Fly, drive, take the train, take the bus, go with friends, take vacations, go on weekends out of town.....if YOU dont look, then nobody will ever SEE you.
*******************************************************
The other problem is that this is an "instant" society. Does not matter where you are from, it's all become and instant society.
Want some soup? Open a can and heat it up.
Want a burger and fries? Go through the drive thru.
Want new pants? Go to the store and get a pair.
Its all instant. Instant gratification. That does not happen with relationships. Even "love at first sight" doesnt happen over night. And those who do practice "instant relationships" are never happy, never content, never appreciative of what they have.
I call it the "Kleenex mentality" (Kleenex is a tissue company who make boxes of instant tissues).
The Kleenex Mentality - Pull out one, use it, throw it away, pull out another one.
Too many people believe that relationships/romance/love is an instant item, just waiting for them to pull it out of thin air or the internet.
They find someone that physically pleases them, and then finds out they have nothing in common, so they "throw them away" and grab another. These types of people are never happy, never concerned with anyone else s needs but their own. And as long as whoever the poor sap is they are with is not instantly making THEM happy, they will get rid of them and get another.
People are NOT instant, nor are they living next door to you for your convenience.
It is YOUR job to get yourself out there and get to know people, not theirs. After all, you never know who you are going to meet. You could be passing up your best friend in all the world, or ignoring the perfect person for you, all because you are expecting everything to come to you while you hide in your little world.
Whatever it is you want in your life............It ain't gonna happen if YOU don't work at it!!!