When is it definitely gay?

[TonyAndonuts]

I posted a thread before asking if you guys knew any "Super Straights" and I got the idea from a Game Grumps video. One of the guys, Arin, told a story about how he used to be in a club, the D-Club, where he and his friends just show each other their dicks. They did it because people used to call them gay even though they all felt very secure in their heterosexuality. So they gather together, show each other their dicks, and conclude that they're still not gay because they're not feeling anything from it. Every so often, they'd joke around and try to make each other laugh with dick jokes of course. Once they even had a sword fight with their dicks because they thought it was funny.

Recently (or today) they released another video where Arin and the other Grump, Danny, got into a little debate on whether what Arin and his friends did was gay. Danny said that being naked around each other is one thing, but having a dick sword fight is going a little too far and it's definitely a homosexual act. Arin disagreed and defended himself by saying that it didn't feel gay to any other them because it was just a joke to make each other laugh. He says that none of them were getting off to it. It's not like Arin touched dicks and felt all hot and bothered and wanted to go even further. After seeing each other's dicks for so long, they were just desensitized and it didn't register to them as gay, only a joke. But Danny still thinks that even if they didn't think it was gay, it was still gay.

It kind of got me thinking and I thought I'd make a thread about it. What do you think, is Arin right or is Danny right? Personally, I think I'm gonna side with Arin. Like he said, none of them were getting turned on by it, they were just joking around. Plus, it seems like women are much more comfortable with each other when it comes to naked and sexual situations especially at parties, but people aren't nearly as eager to throw a lesbian label at them. So why is it different with guys?

[larafan25]

If you're gay you're gay, if you're not you're not. It's painfully simple.

Sticking a finger up someone's butt is not gay, it's not anything, it's a prostate examine. We give meaning to what we do.

[Woollyhats]

The physical act is not gay, and sexual activity is obviously context specific. There are some obvious cases where someone will say "I'm not gay! I have no attraction for men!" while having sex with men, and you just have to know where the exceptions exist.

In regards to the people you're discussing, they certainly sound gay and I have to wonder why they're doing this. I wonder if perhaps they have some degree of pleasure, and believe they are not gay because they like women more. For the purpose of discussion, I will assume they are being totally honest in that they have no attraction to males.

Given that, they can't be gay. The could literally jerk off next to each other, and unless they're actually attracted to one another it's not homosexual, although still very tabboo, weird, and boundary breaching. Despite this, males masturbating together is not unheard of.

If they're telling the truth about their feelings they aren't gay. Simple.

[partis]

I would say cock sword play is a straight thing. And thats pretty mild compared to what some lads will do on a night out. Look at tv shows like "jackass" or from the uk "dirty sanchez" and thats for tv!

[Sylph]

There's always that belief that men are too sexual to be able to "play around" like women do, without feeling aroused or stimulated to some extent and mount one another.

Whether it's gay or not, they're still grown men slapping dicks, and obviously are doing it for more than just the fact that they're desensitized. Women don't just rub their vaginas just to do it(most times) and when they do it's cause they like it or get something from it.

Men are just too afraid to admit it might be fun to rub or slap dicks, cause it's seen as gay, whereas women can do so, cause it's not psychologically the same for them.

Men penetrate, women dont, and with all the pressures of men and anal sex andwhat that means, men tend not to want to even try it for obvious reasons.

And I actually don't think "sword fighting" is a gay thing. It's more like a stupid guy thing in general. Like who does that?

[partis]

Sylph you said it yourself… its a stupid guy thing. There not doing it to "get something from it" its more like how can we do something madder than last weekend. And men who slap dicks are probally not worried about admitting it. Its not a common thing men keep to themselves lol.

[Bowyn Aerrow]

I'm gay and I don't show my dick to just anyone and do 'sword fights' to prove or disprove my sexuality. Sounds immature to me is what it sounds like.

I used to try to explain to people that its homosexual not homoSEXual - in that there isn't emphasis on the sex part, in fact being a homosexual is a lot more about emotions than sex.

But I have concluded I am wrong, being gay is all about sex, and more sex, and nothing but sex. Clearly....

[Woollyhats]

I'm gay and I don't show my dick to just anyone and do 'sword fights' to prove or disprove my sexuality. Sounds immature to me is what it sounds like.

I used to try to explain to people that its homosexual not homoSEXual - in that there isn't emphasis on the sex part, in fact being a homosexual is a lot more about emotions than sex.

But I have concluded I am wrong, being gay is all about sex, and more sex, and nothing but sex. Clearly....

I don't think you're wrong. Some of what it means to be gay isn't immediatly visible and exists in the brain --- personally, feeling, etc . It's harder to explain those concepts to someone, and a convienent way of explaining sexuality is to use the basic "Well, do you masturbate to men or women?", but you're not wrong.

[Pix]

Not gay.

As for why there are different labels that's because there are certain expectation of men and women and they're enforced by both genders. Gotta say though, their arguing over whether something was gay or not reminds me a lot of school girls wondering if something they did (or even wear) makes them a slut (and asking their friends). And I'll also throw in I find it confusing that jocks and athletes (including homophobic ones) get away with smacking each others butts all the time when most other men wouldn't get a pass for that. Perhaps it's like how popular girls in school can go a lot further and wear more daring clothes without being called a slut like any other girl would be.

[TonyAndonuts]

I'm gay and I don't show my dick to just anyone and do 'sword fights' to prove or disprove my sexuality. Sounds immature to me is what it sounds like.

Oh, Arin and Danny are VERY immature. Believe me.