First timer needs some advice

[newlyout26]

Hello there. I am a recently out bi man with very limited experience with the same sex. Last night I had my second sexual encounter with a man, and it was my first time being penetrated.
My question is is there a way for me to be more relaxed during? Are there any sorts of exercises I could do to make it less painful? I like it quite a bit, but the pain becomes a little too intense after a short amount of time.

Thank you in advance!
Josh

[MisterTinkles]

Not really. If you are going to tense up, its going to hurt more.....until you are used to it.

My only suggestions are get buzzed on booze, and get you some really GOOD lube.

[marshlander]

Take your time and make sure he takes his. Use plenty of lube and find a position where you have control over the depth and speed of penetration. You on top squatting or sitting astride him is one you could try. Have you tried practising with a dildo?

[newlyout26]

Yeah, I realized that I was tensing up too much, but it was hard not too. I got a little more relaxed at the end, and that really helped.

I have thought about getting a dildo, but haven't yet. I imagine that would be a really good way to ease into it without having to have someone stop or be too rough.

Thanks!

[James]

They also have a product called butt plugs in assorted sizes, which are a little shorter thatn dildo's, so you have options

[newlyout26]

Thank you James. I have seen those before, but I didn't really know what the real purpose for them was exactly.

[EvenOlderButWiser]

Lube Lube Lube. Did I mention LUBE!

Practicing by yourself is also a good idea as it gets you used to the sensation which can be rather strange to get used to.

As long as your partner is patient and accepts that your on a learning curve you should be fine.

Don't forget the safe sex part

ObW
X

[driftwood]

Take your time and make sure he takes his. Use plenty of lube and find a position where you have control over the depth and speed of penetration. You on top squatting or sitting astride him is one you could try. Have you tried practising with a dildo?

All the recommendations are spot-on, but especially "Take your time and make sure he takes his." There should never be any pain involved. This is actually the top's responsibility, but if he doesn't know how to control it, you can try "putting the bottom on top" like marshlander suggests. That puts you in control.

I also highly recommend practicing with a dildo.

[newlyout26]

Thank you so much everyone! Practicing by myself is definitely the way I need to go I think, as he really isn't my partner, just a friend that I have been with a few times. I don't really see us together again, but I want to be at least a little more experienced for my next time.

[driftwood]

Practicing by myself is definitely the way I need to go ...
I want to be at least a little more experienced for my next time.

Get a dildo (or several (or dozens)) and practice by yourself, or with a friend, or with your next lover. Don't try to be "more experienced" for the next time. It's not a performance, it's something to be shared. Your next lover may not be any more experienced than you are. Then again, he may have many years of experience. Either way, it's more about sharing than about being perfect. You can both learn from each other.