Drkmcnamara Wrote:Am I being the victim of me always wanting to be the overachiever and when it doesn't happen I totally lose it because my life is so not what I have planned it to be?
I don't know - are you?
I think you have this impression that everyone else has it easier, better, or are somehow managing this thing called life better than you. Secret: No, they ain't.
I think you are competing against the outward image people make of themselves and have assumed you have somehow failed at life. You didn't fail, the problem is everyone wears masks to hide that their relationship is on the rocks, that they hate their job, that they are in debt up to their eyebrows - all of the stuff folk have issues with, they hide it - some not as well as others.
Take those nasty queens who said rediclous stuff about you - That is there failing, not yours that is them being all tore up because they know they are failing in their life, so they use you to make themselves feel better.
They are not superior to you, sure they may do everything in their power to make you believe that, and it may feel like it because they can be particularly mean or nasty.... but the truth is that is them trying to hide behind the mask of superiority.
Where as you THINK you are messed up, they really are messed up.
Or do you go around attacking people and being ugly at them? No? Then you are far better than they will ever be.