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Is this a normal behavior?
#11
I don't necessarily agree with the criticism of technology in this case. I mean, yeah some people are glued to their phones like zombies, which I don't understand, but now days texting is a part of life...

I think the real issue is that someone in the relationship is a bit too needy. Either that, or you both have different expectations on how often you should be talking. Regardless, I don't really think the issue has anything to do with phones or anything else. If it wasn't texting it would be calling.. if it wasn't that it'd be seeing each other in person. You both simply expect something and aren't getting it.

The fact is everyone needs some of their "own" time. Both of you need to realize and respect that.
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#12
Your problem is surprisingly common. I've witnessed many brave men and women fall under these needy partners. He doesn't mean any harm obviously but the fact that he needs constant re-assurance is definitely a problem. Somehow you have to explain to him that you express your affection by other means than spamming text messages and he's going to have to accept that.
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#13
So he expects you to spam his phone with near-constant inane messages (because that's what they'll inevitably become at that rate and in that format), you can only do it at a highly-frequent rate because you've got other shit to do, he breaks off communication because he unrealistically assumes you're not interested (messages every 4-5 hours? not interested my ass), he decides to shift all the burden on you, and when you actually comply he pulls the double standard of not obsessively responding instantly himself.

I don't get this whole back and forth text tag shit...talk to each other face to face about it. Texting should be a supplement, not something to cause arguments and divide you two. Honestly if it were me, him thinking I'm not interested because I "only" text every 4-5 hours would have been a red flag that this guy's expectations are a little out of whack. Don't respond in kind.
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#14
MrLolo Wrote:So I've been dating my boyfriend for a month now and when we first started he texted me a lot and called me but now he doesn't do it as often. The other day he was telling me that because I do not text him, which I do but not every single hour maybe every 4-5 hours, he thinks I'm not interested in him. The thing is I think he wants me to always text him first now and if a long time passes he gets mad. Today I called him in the afternoon and he was busy doing something from work and he said he would call me in 5 minutes but 5 hours have passed and he haven't called so I either assume he is busy, forgot, or doesn't care. But every time I text him he does responds. Am I overreacting? I think sending a text takes seconds and no matter how busy you are, you can make the time.

I'm not sure if that is normal, but I met a similar clingy guy who's getting mad because I didn't text first, but the case was he's always the first who texted, yet he was a busy person and a social butterfly, so when he didn't text, I assume he's so busy and I don't want to interrupt, then he really got mad because he felt unimportant to me. After the explanation, he said he's indeed so busy, but no matter how busy he could be, he still wanna be in touch with me, so while he's busy he's waiting for me to text first. Actually I was having a good time too, I'm a distant person and I need a huge space and time for my self, his neediness really annoyed me.

IMHO you should ask your boyfriend directly about the issue, different person has different personality and perception, if you keep seeing the issue from the other person's point of view, it might cause trouble if it doesn't meet what you both 'secretly' expect.
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#15
I may be way off here but I get the feeling he is trying to be in control.

Been there done that.
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#16
I used to be pissed off if someone I cared about didn't contact me within 15 minutes of me texting or whatever.

I look at that person now and want to punch him in the face. Now, it's not as big a deal. As long as I get a response at some point, I'm fine. I'm at a phase where if I get bombarded by messages, I start wanting to throw my phone in the garbage.
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