Why does everyone want physical?

[Ruru]

[COLOR="Purple"]This may sound repetitive or someone may already have told you the same but it feels like it should be adressed again, sorry if it's annoying.

The little touches are the simplest, and some people appreciate the smallest of touches the most because it hands off the sensation of safety and trust (as ridiculous as it may sound).
They're often manifestations of a need for showing some sort of affection, wether it's a silent hug or a careless and random kiss on the forehead, some manifestations ofcourse are stronger than others as sometimes you may wanna just jump on your partner and wrestle (you get the metaphor) 'till you both get tired of it.

Also I suggest you tell your partner once in a while if you want more or if you're curious you can ask him why, I know it's not the best piece of advice or solution for your questions and problems at hand but if he loves you enough, he'll always tend to your need for more or answers with a smile, at least that's how mine does, and I have the most ridiculous of questions and bullshits happen.

But again take this comment with a grain of salt.[/COLOR]

[SilverBullet]

I am in love with him, I know it. I would do anything for him. I definitely don't see him as friend, he's my boyfriend. I can't believe that you're only in love when you want to touch other person. Is it really so?

I find it odd that you love him yet get "annoyed" with things like kissing and snuggling.
Personally my bf is nearly incapable of annoying me even his quirks are cute to me and I love them too ^_^. I believe im the same way with him and we definitely meet other in the middle or close like im gonna drag him to see Godzilla, hes gonna drag me to see a Phantom of the Opera play lol its three hours X_X. I joked with him I was gonna say his name repeatedly every 2 minutes throughout the play and thus was threatened with my life .

[72jay]

While I don't quite fit all those categories I see nothing "not normal" about that.

First, my comments were directed specifically to the OP in response to what he described. Unless you are the OP, I don't know why you thought I was talking to you.

While I did quote a piece of your post, I never thought you were talking to me, the comment I left was more for the OP .
I stay firm in my personal belief that there is nothing wrong with not wanting sex

Secondly, did you bother to read the entirety of my comments in this thread?

I'll admit to missing the fact there was a 2nd page. but f**k it, it was late & I was tired.

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As to any further discussion with an unfriendly dude ... no thanks, instead I may look & see if this forum has some sorta block/ignore option so we never have to see one of eachother's posts

[saif1232]

Hmmm, is he aware your the "take me to the seaside" kind of guy? Maybe you should speak to him about it, also, some people enjoy the kissing n stuff more than others, therefore like to spend more time doing it, instead of waiting for him to take you anywhere, how about you suggest it n ask him to go ? You should compromise! Your interests are just as important as his in your relationship!

[TwisttheLeaf]

Okay... the first question is.... Why is sex important to people.

Sex is usually important to people for two reasons. 1) It feels good. REALLY good. We are pleasure-driven creatures, this sex is usually a focus. 2) Bonding. For a wide majority, most find sex and physical touching to be a bonding experience, and this sounds like it includes your boyfriend.

If you don't think anything is phyically wrong with you, that's great. BUT, wouldn't it be a good idea to be sure? Especially since this is something that's clearly important to your boyfriend? Going in and getting an exam, explaining the issue and a couple of blood tests isn't really -that- big of a deal that you couldn't do it for him, for yourself, just to -see- if there's something there that could be holding you back from an even better experience with the one you love.

IF it turns out, then, that everything is normal? Then would be the time to talk to your partner and let him know how you feel.

[dudewithabeard]

What I feel when he touches me? Nothing special, just a touch of his hand. Nothing overwhelming about it.

If you feel nothing then you have to tell him how you feel. He needs to be able to decide if wants a life void of physical contact. You obviously know the type of person he is, so it would be cruel of you to continue to string him along. Another question should ask yourself is how does the thought of him having sex with another person make you feel? If still nothing, then in my opinion you are not romantically in love with him. And you really need to talk to him or you may lose him completely from your life and you will never get to do the fun things that you love to do with him. That doesn't sound like something you want.



sidenote: not sure if this comment is still relevant but I felt the need to post.

sidenote2: for people who have no sexual drive, getting your testosterone checked does not question the sexual life you choose or want to live. It is actually a medical issue.

[yourname]

Well call me crazy but it sounds to me like youre not in love, trust me when you are in love those annoying things you mentioned are the things that sweep you off your feet, its what you yearn for a touch, kiss, and sex well forget about it because its the best, ONLY when youre in love truly madly deeply in love which you don't sound to be maybe you like him as a friend more than your partner, ive been through that many times but when I get annoyed at their cuddling or touching I just let them know we should just be friends, only cause in my experience ive learned it gets worse and worse as time goes on.

Yup. When you're in love with someone (in the way we're talking about) more often than not, people have to stop you from getting physical at every opportunity. This sounds like you're friends....very, very, good friends. Soul brothers even, but that ain't being lovers.

Personally, the answer is in the question: couples want to get physical because coupling is a physical relationship....you're not penpals. If you don't want to get physical with him, than frankly I think you're being incredibly selfish leading him along...incredibly selfish. And that is only going to lead to resentment.

This doesn't sound like something that is going to get better...with that in mind, should it really continue??

[Anonymous]

If I could show you how much I love him, you'd probably be surprised.

We talked about it, he's willing to be together with me, despite this. He was surprised at first, but then he was like "ok, we can do other things too". I offered him to break up, he didn't even let me talk about that.

So I think that perhaps we'll stay together.