05-26-2014, 09:02 PM
Hello guys!
So some time ago I made this thread http://gayspeak.com/showthread.php?t=28213
I received support and lots of good tips from you all that made my life a little more bearable. Although this guy never really stopped bugging me, making all kinds of stupid comments, it felt really good to know you all support me.
The thing is that because of his excellent marks this guy got a chance to go on an exchange program. He accepted and now he's studying abroad and he won't be back until autumn.
And now comes the weird part. I know I should probably feel happy now. No one is bugging me anymore, no one is calling me a fag, queer or sissy and no one is implying that it's time for me to go to the mental hospital because I'm gay. Everyone should feel relieved once the bully is away, but not me I guess. I miss him, I miss him terribly and every day. I think about him every night before going to sleep. I heard some of the guys he hung out with talking that he's doing good and is satisfied with his studies. Lots of times I've thought about e-mailing him to ask how is he and what is he doing, but I'm sure he wouldn't answer because of his dislike to gays and especially me.
Every day I'm waiting for him to come back, how weird is that? I know that when he does come back, everything - swearing at me, jeering and mockery of my orientation will come back with him, but somehow it doesn't matter to me. I want to see him and hear his voice again so badly. What's going on?
So some time ago I made this thread http://gayspeak.com/showthread.php?t=28213
I received support and lots of good tips from you all that made my life a little more bearable. Although this guy never really stopped bugging me, making all kinds of stupid comments, it felt really good to know you all support me.
The thing is that because of his excellent marks this guy got a chance to go on an exchange program. He accepted and now he's studying abroad and he won't be back until autumn.
And now comes the weird part. I know I should probably feel happy now. No one is bugging me anymore, no one is calling me a fag, queer or sissy and no one is implying that it's time for me to go to the mental hospital because I'm gay. Everyone should feel relieved once the bully is away, but not me I guess. I miss him, I miss him terribly and every day. I think about him every night before going to sleep. I heard some of the guys he hung out with talking that he's doing good and is satisfied with his studies. Lots of times I've thought about e-mailing him to ask how is he and what is he doing, but I'm sure he wouldn't answer because of his dislike to gays and especially me.
Every day I'm waiting for him to come back, how weird is that? I know that when he does come back, everything - swearing at me, jeering and mockery of my orientation will come back with him, but somehow it doesn't matter to me. I want to see him and hear his voice again so badly. What's going on?