So yeah…a month in and it's over. I can never seem to hold down a relationship, if you can even call it that.
I’m so done with dating.
I just can’t do it. Too many feelings grow for someone and they back out of it. I can’t always blame them, and in some cases, I can’t blame myself. This is one of the cases where the other person isn’t to blame but neither am I. Things just happen. Don't they?
So, no more dating sites. No more of any of that. I figure one day I’ll find my better half/soul mate, perhaps marry them at some point in life and eventually raise a family, but none of that is this year, or anytime soon. Who really knows about these things…but being single for so long sucks, yet I'm so sick of dating.
All I know is I have to accept things as they are and try not to think about “what ifâ€Â. Ain’t nobody got time for that. Am I right?
 
![[-]](https://gayspeak.com/images/duende_v3_local/collapse.png)
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Usually,,, when you have finally given up on dating,,, that's when the right person pops into your life and everything suddenly clicks.
You can give up dating, but don't close the door on opportunity.
Jim
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jimcrackcorn Wrote:Usually,,, when you have finally given up on dating,,, that's when the right person pops into your life and everything suddenly clicks.
You can give up dating, but don't close the door on opportunity.
Jim
Honestly with the way I'm feeling, closing the door isn't an option (I really want a relationship) but at the same time it's like I don't even know if I can handle it.
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I see you're 23 now. How old were you when you began dating (guys)?
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MikeW Wrote:I see you're 23 now. How old were you when you began dating (guys)?
I've been dating guys since I was 19.
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ChrisH Wrote:I've been dating guys since I was 19.
That's four or so years. For me it was 15 before I met Bill. Lots of dating, a few hook-ups, several serious relationships, some that were devastating (but that didn't stop me, lol).
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meninlove Wrote:That's four or so years. For me it was 15 before I met Bill. Lots of dating, a few hook-ups, several serious relationships, some that were devastating (but that didn't stop me, lol).
For the last four years I've dated countless guys, never hooked up, never had sex with anyone, been in three short relationships; cheated on (1st), forgotten (2nd), ignored (3rd).
And yet I keep wanting them because I know there's a guy out there that respects me. But WHO this guy is and WHERE this guy is and WHEN I will ever meet this guy is just another thought of the hopeless romantic.
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ChrisH Wrote:I've been dating guys since I was 19. I'm just trying to give you a bit of perspective here. Usually straight teens start dating earlier, I don't know what the 'norm' is these days but 15 or so wouldn't surprise me. The point is most gay guys don't date until they're away from home and so they usually don't begin to have those 'learning experiences' that straight teens do. Most gay guys don't start dating until they are in your age group. Dating is where you begin to learn about yourself and other guys, what you like, what you don't, what other guys like, what they don't, who you can trust and not, and so on.
Being in a relationship (that is more than 'going steady' so to say) is a sort of 'ideal' fantasy that a lot of young gay guys have (not all). Problem is, they don't yet know that they're actually not *ready* for an on-going, committed relationship. Becoming "ready" means getting to a place in yourself where you know what your life is (mostly) about and that your life and the life of your partner can work together to create a home for you both. This could happen at 23 (I don't know you so can't really say) but, on average, I'd say you have another four or five years to 'get there'.
IOW, don't fret. You can't push the river. As was suggested, stay open to the possibility of meeting someone you actually like as a person. Someone you want to spend time with. Begin doing that and see where it goes. Putting pressure on yourself to 'be there' before you are only makes one kind of miserable. No need for that! Enjoy the things your life has to offer, focus on being independent and leaving a bit of room for someone else to show up, too. It will happen. 
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ChrisH Wrote:For the last four years I've dated countless guys, never hooked up, never had sex with anyone, been in three short relationships; cheated on (1st), forgotten (2nd), ignored (3rd).
And yet I keep wanting them because I know there's a guy out there that respects me. But WHO this guy is and WHERE this guy is and WHEN I will ever meet this guy is just another thought of the hopeless romantic.
*checks with old self* That sounds completely familiar. *winks warmly*
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Done with it. All of it.
