*hugs*
I just don't feel comfortable around strangers. And when I see them dancing together and kissing and stuff it makes me feel like nothing. Yeah... I don't think we're meant to be part of that crowd, anyway.
I like one-on-one settings, not groups of people.
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East Wrote:Well...A lot of the people who stand on "high moral ground"...they fall the farthest...because they have a lot farther to fall. It's a rule more than an exception.
Maybe adjust that a bit so you don't beat yourself up so much or feel bad. Don't look at it as stepping "down"...maybe stepping a bit to the left?...
I'm afraid so. Now that I kind of announced to my friends that I'm not into hook up,and suddenly I do it (supposedly),it feels like I'm gonna be judged.
Uneunsae Wrote:Anonymous, maybe you need to ask yourself if you really believe that NSA sex is wrong or if you're just someone who needs to have a connection before sex (like myself). There's a big difference! If you decide it's what you want, it doesn't make you a bad person as long as you aren't hurting anyone else.
I don't think that it's wrong if it's between consenting adults. As of now,I don't really know if I need a connection or I just think that I need it,cause I've never done sex. But I certainly don't want my first time to be with total strangers. My second time,maybe,but I can't very well explore it cause I haven't lost my virginity. Not that I want to throw it away,but I feel like I need to get it done so that I could explore whether NSA is something I could do or not. Maybe I'm making this whole losing virginity thing a big deal than it is.
East Wrote:I had sex with around 750 different men...maybe close to 1000 but definitely not over 1000...and if we throw out 100 mistakes and another 250 yawners...that leaves a solid 400-650 life affirming and enriching experiences which did not violate my own moral code at all (the bad ones didn't either..they were just mistakes).
I hear a lot of times people describe sex with strangers as something degrading that means nothing...but not for me. It meant a lot to me...sharing humor...wit...life experiences....wisdom...orgasms...friendship...companionship...lots of things you can't even measure.....
....and I have been with the love of my life now for 28 years and that is great as well...I wouldn't trade either experience for anything....
Wow.. That's..a lot of numbers.. I'm actually quite surprised you could be monogamous, I've always have a perception that someone who does NSA can't be monogamous,cause he will feel like he loses the freedom he used to have. Also,I see NSA as a way for both party to just use each other,it doesn't feel good when I thought of that.
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Yeah,I can't go to a gay club too cause I hate crowd and noise,and I get social anxiety real fast in crowds.
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My first time was with a guy a friend introduced me to. At the time, I just wanted to have sex. I regret that decision and I don't like to think about my first time. But there are other men who would have been happy with that arrangement, so if your gut is telling you that you don't want to do it with a stranger, then don't. Just be patient and wait. It doesn't have to be a boyfriend. Maybe you'll meet a friend who also wants to explore and you can do it safely together and lovingly amongst friends.
That's the kind of relationships I'd like now, actually. LOL
A better memory is my first gay kiss. It just kind of happened with a friend and today I miss him 17 years later!
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I feel like a hypocrite
. That (being shy)is an aphrodisiac to a lot of guys...guys you do NOT want to have sex with. I attracted obsessive men the first two years because I was too scared to be mean to them or worried about hurting their feelings...BIG mistake. I had two official stalkers where I had to take action and a lot of other horrible experiences with men who wanted to "own me"....
