Gay Dating vs. Hetero Dating

[King]

So I'm pretty new to all of this (still basically in the closet) but I have to say that it's so much more fun than trying to date women! Here are the pros I've noticed:
- Nicer people on these dates
- Date two usually results in however far you want to take things (sexually)
- No squabbling over who pays the bill -- you're both guys, you're both on equal footing. Split it in half and that's that.

It's been such a refreshing start to all of this for me. I'm 27, somewhat good looking, not a ridiculous body but not overweight, and I'm basically able to hook up very very attractive 21-23 year old men just by being myself. And this is someone who usually can't make it past date one with a woman.

One other very good thing that I noticed - You can be nervous in front of a guy and he may not care. Show nervousness in front of a woman and that's ballgame. Case in point - I went to happy hour with a 21 year old guy the other week. This was our second date. First date we just had coffee, second we went to a happy hour (and the night prior discussed PERHAPS hooking up that night if things went well enough). As the date began I am visibly sweating. It's somewhat hot in the bar but he was not sweating and I certainly was. I'm thinking..."wow, I'm sweating because I'm nervous and he see this. This is going nowhere". Eventually I'm able to calm down and the night ends VERY well. Something as slight as sweating at the beginning of a date is something that you will never be able to recover from on a date with a woman, but with a guy that date can still end in terrific sex. Amazing.

Anyone agree or disagree with my comments? Who has anything to add?

[50Plus]

Totally agree with you King. That has been my experience.

Am also able to share some deeper secrets with a guy, because it feels like I am sharing it with my brother and not necessary someone I am trying to impress.

I do feel like I am much more myself when chatting up a guy. heck, I've even made the first moves which was not the case when I was cloistered away in the closet.

[Borg69]

1. You got lucky.
2. If you're cute you can get away with more.
3. Gay guys can be just as, if not more shallow than women.
4. If your guy date perceived it as a hookup, you probably got a pass on some flaws.
5. Don't assume all guys go Dutch.
6. It's true women will probably expect better behaviour - they're looking for long term and to be respected.

[Anocxu]

I paid for this push up bra...

You pay for dinner!

[King]

1. You got lucky.
2. If you're cute you can get away with more.
3. Gay guys can be just as, if not more shallow than women.
4. If your guy date perceived it as a hookup, you probably got a pass on some flaws.
5. Don't assume all guys go Dutch.
6. It's true women will probably expect better behaviour - they're looking for long term and to be respected.

To point 5 -- don't assume I will pay for you, either.

[TwisttheLeaf]

From my observations of others, I'd say that both are equally difficult in the dating arena, just in different ways. Borg makes excellent points that I would have pointed out myself.

Note: I say from my observation of others because when I was single my "dating" experience falls into 3 categories...

1) Night club hook ups with women. These were essentially where I met them at the club (met them for the first time, or called one and said "lets go dancing") and either they came to my place or I to theirs for some hot sex after a good time on the dance floor.

2) Hook ups with men. Since, prior to my facial scar, I was a very, very pretty man? I got away with a lot of shit that someone looking for a permanent partner would not have let fly.

3) Dates with older men making an effort to "apply for Daddy status". I never looked for nor wanted a sugar daddy, but sometimes? It was nice to be taken out and treated to something special. Most of the men I "dated" in this capacity were wealthy and very grateful for my time. They paid for everything though the night and did their best to make sure I had a terrific evening in every way that counts (and some that don't).

I'm pretty sure that none of these categories fits into the kind of "dating" that you're asking about.

Maybe it's just as simple as that you do better at dating men because that's what -fits- for you?

[50Plus]

Maybe it's just as simple as that you do better at dating men because that's what -fits- for you?

That is what I believe for me. It feels far more comfortable and relaxed.

[Wardo94]

Wow. Wish I could be as optimistic as you on gay dating lol Most guys I met or either shallow, clingy, or just full on pervs.

[ExpatBrit77]

To start with, the first thing to establish is whether a gay date is a date or if it's a sex date. I suspect you might be referring to a sex date, given the amount of times you mention having great sex....

"- Nicer people on these dates"

I guess it depends on your own experience. Not in my experience. Like wardo says, superficial and shallow is often the case.

"Date two usually results in however far you want to take things (sexually)"

Assuming there is a date two. I haven't had one of those in years LOL.