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Sex after third dating
#21
East Wrote:Restroom sex? No...never EWWWWWWWW...and never dragging anyone anywhere. I had zero problem meeting men

Here's the thing...I LOVE sex and I LOVE having sex with men I liked. I hated other people defining morality for me and equating sex with some bullshit moral code so I decided to be true to myself and be honest with the guys..and me....

I really hate it when a person who, for instance, lies to themselves and everyone else but decides to tell me about morality because I liked to fuck and I wasn't ashamed of myself...they make my skin crawl.

I had a lot of men who wanted to date me...who brought me gifts and invited me to go just about everywhere with them...and I wanted no part of it. I wanted to fuck and I wanted it to be what it was...so I liked men who also wanted to fuck and not have any drama or strings attached.

The date part? If we clicked...it we decided we liked each other...we could hang out. I let it unfold naturally if that was gonna happen but I would not pretend it was going anywhere if I knew it wasn't. I had regular fuck buddies who were friends and we also did things together which I guess is a "date" (sorta)....

I am not at all fickle when it comes to men I am interested in dating and I know in a second if I am interested and I don't confuse them with hookups who I had no intention of dating. . None of my boyfriends were hookups though I don't have any "rules" about sex....I would usually make out with them for hours on the first date instead of fucking. I have had four boyfriends/lovers...the current one for almost 29 years....and I enjoy being with him exclusively but I am not sorry about the guys I had sex with and it wasn't meaningless or empty...it rocked and I would do (most of) it all over again...

Considering you've done public sex at various other places,I thought restroom was part of it,guess there's that boundary. :p

I'm a bit confused though,so you said that you must have sex first before a date,but now you said you only make out with them first instead of fucking,which is it? :confused:
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#22
AlfredMamza Wrote:Considering you've done public sex at various other places,I thought restroom was part of it,guess there's that boundary. :p

I'm a bit confused though,so you said that you must have sex first before a date,but now you said you only make out with them first instead of fucking,which is it? :confused:

I guess it probably does sound weird. It isn't the public aspect about restrooms that bothers me....I know some people mix the two but I don't want to be reminded of pee or poop when I am having sex...nor do I want to smell it (BARF)...and I think that restrooms are very unsanitary.

The date part...there are certain guys I am interested in romantically ..and I recognize them immediately when I see them....very very few men turn me on romantically. When I meet one of those guys it is a completely different thing than the normal hookups....

I have never really had much confusion or angst in my love and/or sex life. I know who I am and what I want and basically bypassed most of the usual crap. I also learned from my bad experiences rather quickly which helped shape my point of view...

For instance...when I was 20/21 I had a series of stalkers and I felt victimized and a bit helpless until I learned to say what I think instead of worrying about hurting other people's feelings. It was a rocky couple of years and some really scary situations where I needed legal help and law enforcement intervention. I also had a horrible relationship with someone who tried to completely control me and isolate me and so I learned to know what I do and don't want in sex and relationships...you have to learn from your experiences....

I had another thing...everyone laughed at me but I didn't care...I only wanted to be with an Aries man born the last week of March because all of the guys I was interested in romantically and 3 of my 4 lovers (the good three including my mate of 29 years) were all born the last week of March. For all of the people who made fun of me and laughed or scoffed at astrology...SUCCESS IS THE BEST REVENGEWinknudge 29 very happy years with my March 28 guy....I was right...they were wrongDance2.

Does that explain it better?
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#23
East Wrote:We are the same...I am very open and discuss sex honestly...

BUT we are polar opposites when it comes to having sex. I want sex BEFORE I go on a date with anyone and I make it clear.....if we are gonna do dinner we have to fuck first.

I have had a very successful sex and love life...so it worked perfectly for me.

My advice to the OP...well...you probably shouldn't follow my example in one respect BUT..one the other hand... I was being true to myself and who I was...and that is exactly what you should do as well.

I would try that however I have been used by so many individual in so many different ways that opening myself up to being used (again) just ain't going to work for me.

Unfortunately while you are testing to see if there is sexual compatibility, I can tick off a few guys I have known who use that as an excuse to leap into bed for a one night stand with no real interested in pursing a relationship.

Motivation and intentions are hard to tell with many people... I have decided to err on the side of caution in this aspect.
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