Where should I go from here?

[Russ]

Hi, this is Russ. I posted in the "Introduce Yourself" forum, but my thread over there has kind of stalled, and my questions would probably be more suited for this forum. I am going to copy and paste my second to last posting there, as my opening in this forum:

I've been married since 2010. This is my second marriage, her first. My first marriage ended when that wife cheated on me. I have felt same sex attractions, well, forever I guess, but I have never acted on them (except for porn and a little online). All through my 20s and 30s, I dated tons of women, had lots of fun, got married, and was generally able to ignore/suppress my feelings. In the last two years though, it's has become more and more difficult to ignore them. I feel guilty about all this....I love my wife, but I don't know what to do. I'm not sure how detailed you all want talking sex, but I can share that too. Again, thanks for the mind words. I look forward to more conversation. I feel less alone with this being able to talk here and share this with someone.

Thanks very much for any responses.

[Charon]

Trying to sort out what you're saying I assume you mean that after the rape and pillage of woman kind, you've suppressed a desire to have some sort of physical relationship with men or a man. It's also possible that you would be satisfied with the increasingly popular "bromance". But, first, please qualify just what it is you're asking. Generally everyone here is more than familiar with sex involving another man, some of us have been or are married. So unless it develops that you're married to a three toed sloth or, as with one demented kid on television, having a sexual relationship with a Chevrolet, we can probably handle whatever it is you'd like to discuss, get off your chest, your mind....Just be a bit specific.

[Wolfpack]

Hi Russ and welcome to GS

One or two members like you have been married to women, so their are people on here who can relate to your situation and may be able to help you.

[Iceblink]

You really need to provide some more information here if you are looking for advice. Are you attracted to only or mostly just men? Are you attracted more to men and have a stronger attraction to them, but are still sometimes attracted to women.? If one of these situations is the case, you may be in the wrong type of relationship for you. Are you attracted to men and women equally? Are you attracted mostly to women and more strongly to them, but sometimes have a fantasy about a man? If it is one of these situations then you may just need to honor your commitment like the rest of who are in monogamous relationships. Gay, straight, or bi, almost all of us are still going to find others attractive and have fantasies, but being attracted to both genders does not give you permission to not honor your commitments like the rest of us must do. If this is your situation, you may just have to live with masturbating and fantasy if your plan is staying in your marriage.

[Borg69]

Sounds like you're in a rough situation that you got yourself into TWICE.

I agree with everyone else... We need more info... are you looking to cheat on your wife? Are you planning on leaving her? Just looking for some gay friends to talk to in general and stay with her?
Are you expecting us to talk you into something?

What exactly (or roughly) are your intentions, and what are you hoping to achieve?

[Bowyn Aerrow]

What to do....

Hmm....

Well what do YOU want to do?

There is no 'should do' in this situation. There is where you are and where you hope to go. Yes there are risks here, there is potentially losing what you have for nothing at all... Those kinds of risks exist in all relationship matters.

You know yourself better than anyone else, you know what you need to be content with life. Is it continued marriage to this wife? Is it divorce and trying new things? IDK - I'm not you.