Gay Marriage/Gay Divorce...Equality...?

[Cuddly]

I was a bit stunned to read that your straight friends would say such things.
"These things don't work out", as in gayness is just a phase or that we're all just horndogs wanting to bang every guy that walks by and naturally will not be able to settle for a monogamous relationship??

I hope (s)he lies awake at night thinking "oh what a dumb dumb thing to say! It came out all wrong!!".

It's particularly weird coming from a guy who's divorced himself...

[Buzzer]

I was a bit stunned to read that your straight friends would say such things.
"These things don't work out", as in gayness is just a phase or that we're all just horndogs wanting to bang every guy that walks by and naturally will not be able to settle for a monogamous relationship??

I hope (s)he lies awake at night thinking "oh what a dumb dumb thing to say! It came out all wrong!!".

It's particularly weird coming from a guy who's divorced himself...

I do believe that a lot of straight people see gay marriage as us just wanting to imitate the home and family life they have, while not really having the correct parts or nature to make it work-- even if they may support our right to try.

Ironically, from a lifetime of listening to straight friends confide about their relationships and marriages to me, I believe men and women have far more lost in translation over the gender gap issues than men have with men, applying both to platonic and romantic relationships.

[Adam]

I do believe that a lot of straight people see gay marriage as us just wanting to imitate the home and family life they have, while not really having the correct parts or nature to make it work-- even if they may support our right to try.

Ironically, from a lifetime of listening to straight friends confide about their relationships and marriages to me, I believe men and women have far more lost in translation over the gender gap issues than men have with men, applying both to platonic and romantic relationships.

YES!! I think you've hit on it exactly! I have another friend who's been with his husband 10 years and theyj have 2 biological children (they used surrogates). One of them is a stay at home parent. They own a home in the suburbs, the entire Leave It To Beaver scenario. Yet I've heard people talking about them as if they were playing house.

The internet is full of crap about how gay men are incapable of monogamy. It would be funny if it weren't so sad.

[bilkiba]

I do believe that a lot of straight people see gay marriage as us just wanting to imitate the home and family life they have, while not really having the correct parts or nature to make it work-- even if they may support our right to try.

Ironically, from a lifetime of listening to straight friends confide about their relationships and marriages to me, I believe men and women have far more lost in translation over the gender gap issues than men have with men, applying both to platonic and romantic relationships.

I agree. There are some things (that NEED to be discussed with one's SO) that I just ain't comfortable talking to men about... not even in text, not even to a boyfriend when I had one. Contrarily, I can talk to my girlfriend about just about anything, even if it is weird and awkward.

Straight people need to stop seeing us as abnormal and different all around the globe. And while there is still inequality in the states, I'm also glad we aren't one of those countries where it's still a crime.

[JimmyEcho]

When they said 'these things don't work out' is there a chance that they were talking about marriage in general and not gay marriage in specific?

I am try to understand the issue since marriage is not a desire for my life.

I can' believe these straight people said that.
I don't know, It's not like that around here, (Well, my circle of straight friends)
2 gay guys we know of are married and they're breaking up. My straight friends said
" yeah, marriage is hard, Tom and Jenny are also breaking up after 11 years together "
These guys look at it the same as a straight couple breaking up.

However, It's true, I do know some A$$holes who would say (Yeah, it's because they're Gay)
But I don't think all straight people think this way.

[StormbornWolf]

I just think it is another expectation that those attracted to the same sex are supposed to be the better than those who are not. I believe it is in the best interest of the LGBT community for the next two decades to show a very low divorce rate and for those divorces to remain as private as possible. The reason behind a same-sex divorces will ONLY "prove" some reason to ban same-sex marriage.

[Virge]

Heterosexuals have been programmed all their lives to think in a "it's all about us" mentality and as accepting as they might try to be about gays, they still run it through their heterosexual version of reality in order to process it.

They can't help it. Not even my own amazing supportive parents and brother are able to shake off their heterocentric thinking. Every time I catch them doing it and point it out they give me the deer with a face full of headlights dumass stare like their brain just shut off. I caught my dad in a big one awhile back and knocked the breath out him about it. He's got three patients i know of with HIV, all heterosexual single mothers. While I was at the lab for routine blood work a gay guy came in for blood work and BY THE LOOK ON HIS FACE when he saw me I knew he'd been sent for a HIV test even though he's been in a MANogomous relationship for a bunch of years. So when I saw Dad I asked...
"how many gay patients do you have with HIV?"
Answer: None.
"So why do you send married gay men for HIV tests and not unmarried mothers?"

And for ten seconds he did a bobblehead imitation while his brain absorbed it all.

And I'm sorry to say this.... but most gays do quite a bit of heterocentric thinking. Don't argue about it yet. I'm going to be on here a while and I'll come back with links to threads as examples.

All the research they done on what causes people to be gay has proven time and time again gay brains and straight brains are not the same. By the way heterosexual brains work I kid people that heterosexual brains will one day be classified as a form of mental retardation. They can't help it so you just have to embarrass the fuck out of them when they do it and get ready for them to do it again in 48 hours.

[Uneunsae]

Upon observation and examination of most straight couples I know, I become nauseous. Not sure why gay people want that misery, too but I'm glad we are at least getting the freedom to opt in.

[17vs41]

My friend has left his husband and says that he intends to file for divorce. This is heartbreaking on many levels, but what I'm also finding very disheartening are the reactions from some of our straight friends. These are people whom I've always considered to be strong supporters of gay rights, people who truly understood the concept of equality.

One person predicted that their divorce would have a negative impact on gay rights issues locally. Two others used it as proof that in the long run, gay marriage can't work. One person even asked me if I still meant to go through with my own wedding, given the way that "these things" just don't work out. No one seems to consider that the divorce rate among straight couples in the US is between 40% - 50%.

It's depressing, and it really makes me wonder if there's ever going to be any true equality.

You want equality, here is what you do: Live your damn life and do what makes you happy and stop giving a freak about what society wishes.