So yesterday, I had a full fledged mental breakdown. Normally, I am a very bubbly person but lately I've become a pretty bitter person. I avoid social media because seeing other people happy in their relationships feels like a knife in my heart.
Little backstory: I was raised with Disney classics and the live stories found in classic literature. However, those things are not real. I came out at 18 to a totally supportive friends and family. I had my first date at 23. My second at 25 and nothing since.
At this point, I'm done trying. I hate failing at anything but after failures at different stages that is the only way to describe it. I don't want to hear how young I am. A bunch of friends are already married. Even my little sister is about to walk down the aisle. I really don't like hearing - it'll happen when it happens. In 10 years, not a single person has ever been interested in me.
I know this sounds really negative but I can't help that. The one thing that I've wanted most in life was to fall in love. I'm almost 30 and it hasn't happened. Now I just have to figure out how to continue my life without ever thinking about love again and also not letting other's happiness bring me down.
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I can't lie and give you false hope ..all I can say is I guess you need to get out of your comfort zone if you really want love - put your name forward for everything from volunteer work to anything really, you need a whole new circle of friends to find the one !!! I wish I knew an easier way - just don't give up
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Yes. It is troubling. Advice is along the lines of matty - perhaps expand the comfort zone.
I see your profile lists 18-30. Maybe expand that upwards (especially since there are a lot of lonely older (not old) men).
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Expanding your comfort zone and circle of exposure, as Matty said, is an excellent idea.
You will also need to make sure you -SMILE- at people and are forward enough to introduce yourself to others and get to know them... let them get to know you. You didn't mention any of this in your post, but a decade is a long time to have no interest, and so I'm making an assumption there has to be something holding others back from approaching? Whether it's attitude or shyness coming through, etc, I couldn't say as I don't know you personally.
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I'd listen to those three, they're pretty smart (at least, from what I've ssen)
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For one thing, it hasn't been ten years. If you're almost 30, then you're 29. Your last relationship was at 25. That makes it 4 years, which isn't that bad. Love is something you can't force. There are tons of toads out there. Who knows what's going to happen? As long as you're in a position to receive love, then you're going to be okay. It's when you don't leave yourself open to love that you will feel like no one is out there for you.
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I am shy. No doubt about it. I am always willing to extend a handshake and a smile. When I do make friends it does come easily. I'll also admit that I don't have any gay friends. We didn't have similar interests and eventually drifted apart.
I also have no problem admitting that I am the problem. Shyness coupled with an aversion to bars & clubs minus any gay friends = my crappy situation.
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As Maty and Twist have stated, perhaps changing things UP a bit, expand your outlook, take a break from your normal grind and get away for a few days, try something new to break up the monotony and give a fresh perspective on life in general, that will help you achieve the attitude adjustment that is needed for people to want to approach you.
No one wants to hang out with a downer, someone who is cynical and negative all the time about everything and this attitude comes through even in your OP.
Try laughing at yourself once in awhile, don't take yourself so seriously and see there is joy in life, things to enjoy, smile and laugh about.
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Being in a relationship is a good thing and I am thankful everyday for having my boyfriend in my life. I also enjoyed life when I was single and when I was dating and although I was sometimes lonely and sometimes thought it would be nice to have someone in my life, I never thought of it as the only way possible and what I must have in life in order to be happy. I had a lot friends, was active and did a lot, and went a lot of places. Always be open to meeting that someone special and sometimes put some effort into trying to meet someone, but don't obsess over it and never look at it as the only way that life can be enjoyable.
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