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Virginity; A sacred thing? or a shameful thing?
#1
For all of you who think that I am a love making expert... Here's a shocker!! I am a virgin! (BY CHOICE) and I plan on staying this way until I find the man of my dreams or just someone with whom I can feel comfortable and when it is time.. then it is time.

Much of a fairytale or an illusion that some of you might think that i have in my head, but it is what I believe in and I stand by it. And it isn't because I can't get laid, I can if I wanted to. But how many people lost their virginity or in other words (Wasted it) on some unworthy people? why should it be a night stand with some stranger in my bed? Why shouldn't it be something more valuable, more profound, something in which you can never forget and just never regret it. I don't want it to be a one night fun. I want it to be more than just that, to feel a connection, a bond to my lover. Especially when it is with someone you love, I believe it would be 10x better than just a hook up..

Wouldn't you agree? Should virginity be that much sacred? Thoughts?...
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#2
I think that you should define this for yourself and be true to who you are...

I personally don't believe virginity is either "sacred" or "shameful" in any way.

I will tell you one thing...some people who idealize sex and the importance of virginity sometimes spend their lives with a victim mentality because people don't ever met their fantasy ideals and they are ill prepared to roll with the punches.
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#3
East Wrote:I think that you should define this for yourself and be true to who you are...

I personally don't believe virginity is either "sacred" or "shameful" in any way.

I will tell you one thing...some people who idealize sex and the importance of virginity sometimes spend their lives with a victim mentality because people don't ever met their fantasy ideals and they are ill prepared to roll with the punches.


I already have defined it and it is what I want... As I do roll with the punches, not so much picky and very simple on relationships. Was Just saying that I am saving myself for the right person that's all.. [SPOILER][/SPOILER]
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#4
verysimple Wrote:I already have defined it and it is what I want... As I do roll with the punches, not so much picky and very simple on relationships. Was Just saying that I am saving myself for the right person that's all.. [SPOILER][/SPOILER]

...and what if the person turns out to not be the right person?

This happens so much of the time and this is when the victim mentality can start to overtake the idealist.
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#5
To be honest, I think it is a little awkward when people think that virginity is either shameful or sacred. First of all, it is none of other's business. Second of all, does it really matter if someone lost their virginity to some stranger?
I believe that one should know the whole story before they judge others. This is basically how I think most people behave when they hear that someone lost their virginity:

"So, I lost my virginity to someone I met last night"
"Really? Why would you do that? Don't you feel slutty?"

- The fact that most people think it is "slutty" or any other negative word is faul. That person does not know if the person who lost their virginity has a reason, feel insecure about themselves, or maybe are in love with that person. You have to know the whole story before you judge someone. So rather than saying that losing your virginity is shameful or sacred, what about asking how it felt before and after, or something like that?

With all that being said: I have total respect for someone wanting to wait until they find "that special someone", but I, too, have total respect for people who have had a lot of sex partners. It does not bother me (the only thing that would bother me was if they were cheating on someone). It all depends on who you are and how important you think it is. And one should always ask themselves before they do anything: "Does this make me happy in the long run?".

That is just my thoughts on this.
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#6
East Wrote:...and what if the person turns out to not be the right person?

This happens so much of the time and this is when the victim mentality can start to overtake the idealist.

Then I will have lost my virginity to someone I at least loved at the time.. and won't regret it. Because at that time, I saw him as him in a good picture!

But people always change, sometimes for worse and other times.. for better
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#7
You set yourself very high standards that you might never be able to realise. I've had "anonymous" sex that has never bothered me. Those times have been just enjoyable and nothing more because nothing more was expected. It's a bit like enjoying a wonderful meal in good company. As someone else has pointed out, virginity is neither sacred nor shameful. Why should it be?
"You can be young without money but you can't be old without money"
Maggie the Cat from "Cat on a Hot Tin Roof." by Tennessee Williams
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#8
neither, whatever floats your boat or jerks your gherkin
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#9
Sacred? No, only cows are sacred Wink

Shameful? No.

You're 19 years old. So its not a problem at all... However around 29 year's old it starts becoming a little sad...

Sad because it means you haven't met someone who rocked your world, Sad because it may be a reflection of not having experience love. If you haven't had that by age 29 then something is wrong.

So you are waiting to share this with someone special. That is a good thing. Neither sacred nor shameful, and at your early age not sad in the least. It may reflect a mindful individual who has some gut instinct about the specialness of this gift...
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#10
Bowyn Aerrow Wrote:Sacred? No, only cows are sacred Wink

Shameful? No.

You're 19 years old. So its not a problem at all... However around 29 year's old it starts becoming a little sad...

Sad because it means you haven't met someone who rocked your world, Sad because it may be a reflection of not having experience love. If you haven't had that by age 29 then something is wrong.

So you are waiting to share this with someone special. That is a good thing. Neither sacred nor shameful, and at your early age not sad in the least. It may reflect a mindful individual who has some gut instinct about the specialness of this gift...

Bowyn Aerrow are you a Hindu btw? I'm just curious Smile

I'm 25 years old now. Is it too old to be a virgin? Smile
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