I don't have enough gay friends...

[wayward]

And I don't get out enough. I'm pretty shy, shy enough. My experiences in my local area haven't been satisfying. I like to talk about feelings. I'm deep and it is unnatural for me to chat about what I find to be superficial. If that sounds judgmental I'm sorry, but I just don't clique with people at all easily.

(Maybe I could use some advice on developing a positive attitude)

I'm fascinated with psychology.

I'm plenty self-conscious.

Maybe I'm not using this forum right. I've had a history of trouble with reaching out and connecting. I guess I feel isolated.

Now that I'm done complaining, what I would appreciate is if someone told me what to do about it.

[jogu656]

well making friends isnt easy for me either so if you figure it out, please let me know cause boy do i have hard time

[HvH]

I have recently managed to make a gay friend, but must say it is pretty dam hard, it is not easy finding someone who is gay yet also has the same interests as you, but hang in there, you will eventually find some guys who tick both boxes

[wayward]

Thanks both of you,

[BlueStar]

Only few people like to speak their deep feelings, and even fewer those who express the way psychology does. You definitely look like the old me, before I met my boyfriend and everything changed to the better...

You're neither complaining nor having a negative attitude, it's just who you are. I've had the same trouble history with connecting and socializing, and should I tell, I'm closeted and besides this forum I have zero gay friends.

My heart is with you, and it saddens me a lot that you're feeling isolated...

[Lycanthropist]

Let me preface this by saying I'm not trying to be mean, but damn dude, lighten up. Those things you find superficial are, in my estimation, what builds relationships. How are you going to learn about people unless you talk about inconsequential subjects? If someone came up to me in any type of social setting and started talking about feelings... I'd tell them to get the --ck away from me.

I am not going to talk to a total stranger about my inner-most thoughts. Those are reserved for people that I have an established and on-going relationship. How does one get to that point? By talking about the "little" things in life. What's your favourite colour? What sports teams might you like? What types of shows pique your interest? Shit like that.

Building friendships is like eating a sandwich. You have to start at the outside edge before you can get to the middle. Unless you cut it in half. But people aren't going to appreciate being cut in half. So don't do that.

[Virge]

Making REAL friendships is work --- just as much work as a long term relationship/marriage. You have to constantly work on them to keep them alive, do things together, do things for each other when asked and even without being asked. The only part that sux is (that I've found) is that none of the people I consider my closest friends (except StingRay) like each other enough to socialize amongst themselves. That means I have to invite them over to my house or out to do things in order to have them all in the same place at the same time. And then there are some of them who prefer not to come to things like that so I have to get with them individually. And being shy isn't as bad as you think it is. Jerks like me are drawn to shy people.

[Rob]

My problem is that I only know one gay guy, and we're not that close. Finding gay around here is like climbing Mount Everest.

[lauj]

To be honest, I don't care if I have gay or straight friends. As long as they are true friends I'm happy.

[wayward]

Let me preface this by saying I'm not trying to be mean, but damn dude, lighten up. Those things you find superficial are, in my estimation, what builds relationships. How are you going to learn about people unless you talk about inconsequential subjects? If someone came up to me in any type of social setting and started talking about feelings... I'd tell them to get the --ck away from me.

I am not going to talk to a total stranger about my inner-most thoughts. Those are reserved for people that I have an established and on-going relationship. How does one get to that point? By talking about the "little" things in life. What's your favourite colour? What sports teams might you like? What types of shows pique your interest? Shit like that.

Building friendships is like eating a sandwich. You have to start at the outside edge before you can get to the middle. Unless you cut it in half. But people aren't going to appreciate being cut in half. So don't do that.

I just don't seem to have interests which other people find relatable Lycanthrope. Thanks for your intentions, really, and thank you memechose, also.