is it me? ?

[JackTX]

Spy on him: Is he watching porn without you? Web history. Is he texting other guys and or does he have apps installed? The worst reality is that he has filled the vacuum somewhere else.

I agree that porn is the key to assessing the situation. Is he watching it and jacking off alone? If he IS, there's nothing wrong with him and you guys need to address why that's better or more comfortable for him now. If one of you isn't doing what the other "likes" -- and I don't mean what they have claimed to like but rather the dirty, dirty thoughts that happen inside the head and which are frequently NOT told to the other person even after 7 years due to embarrassment, etc. -- then the overall quality will suffer.

Lots of us have been down this road and lots of people break up or cheat over this shit. It's good that you're wanting to fix it, as long as he actually does too. He probably doesn't feel good about the current situation either if you're being made unhappy (unless he's a selfish bastard). You might start with talking openly about guys you find attractive when you guys are out, and talk about what you like about them. Or watch porn together and talk about that if you can. Start putting some tinder on the fire that is surely still lit somewhere in his head

I'm going to quote Dan Savage again: "One person doesn’t have the right to unilaterally declare another person’s sex life over."

Good luck.