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threesome and relationships?
#1
Hello, I've been together with my boyfriend for 3 months and a half and it has been great so far. The only thing that bothers me is that he is very open minded and i'm not. He likes threesomes and wants me to have one with him but I just don't like that. I feel like he does not love me because he is thinking of being with someone else instead of me. He is a very nice guy and treats me very good, but I just don't like that part of him. I told him I did not want a threesome and he said that's fine then we won't do it. He also likes seeing pictures on Facebook of normal guys and he says that a normal thing that he is just looking and wont do anything with them, he does not look for name of guys they just appear in his Facebook randomly. I know I'm a very jealous guy that's why im trying to work on that. I also look at guys but nothing more, I'm just appreciating their bodies and beauty lol so I guess that's normal lol.
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#2
I see no question above, as well as your issue is already solved...

What is it you really need advice on?
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#3
Jealousy can be a dangerous thing. Sounds like your boyfriend has been honest with you and you with him, and he respects your decision not to engage in threesomes.

When you are as old as I am you will realize looking at pictures is nothing. It's healthy to still be attracted to and be attractive to other guys. How you react to that is the key. A little flirting never hurt anyone.

Threesomes are not my thing either, but I know many couples in healthy relationships that engage In them or have open sexual relationships. Again, not my thing, but if everyone is honest and respectful of the boundaries established, I think it's ok. It really can be just about sex and not a reflection on how much your boyfriend loves you.

Good luck!
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#4
I feel the same as you, I could personally never be with someone who wants to have threesome, I feel like I am not loved too. But if he isn't doing it and is respecting you and is trusting you enough to tell you , I think he does love you
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#5
I'm not good at explaining this kind of thing, but here goes...when I've been third in a threesome, most of the time it was really clear that the couple were in love with each other and I was there to help them satisfy a fantasy or physical need, which I enjoy. The love they expressed towards each other while we played was an unspoken indicator that they both wanted and consented to bringing a third into their bed.

Every now and then it was evident that one of the couple was tolerating the threesome, and I can't think of too many other things so boner-killing for me. I'd make my excuses and leave.

So I guess that's a long way of saying that if you're not into it, it very probably won't be fun for anyone. If your partner gets that, perhaps he'll let off the pressure. It's fine not to be into it.

Be careful though that your not being into it is not due to jealousy. Jealousy will create horrible problems in a relationship. Jealousy in a relationship is like rust on iron. Some wise dude said there is no greater glory than love, no greater punishment than jealousy.

So be wary of jealousy. Don't do that.
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#6
Here's something for you to file away for future use if you need it.

My man talked me into doing that back when he was telling me I needed to 'date round' and experience more --- while I wasn't thinking about anyone but him --- puppy love infatuation I guess. He was the 2nd guy I ever got with.

After we did it a couple of times I picked up on how he was concerned and a little jealous that maybe I was enjoying other guys more than him. It didn't take me long to figure out how to work that situation.

The next time he wanted me to do a three way I just about completely ignored him the whole time. Then there was another one and I got things started while he was busy in the bathroom.

Then *he*came*up*with*the*idea*all*own*his*own* that we didn't need to be doing group sex anymore.

I fessed up two years later about what I did and he called me all sorts of ugly things while he was laffing his butt off about it.

Once in awhile now I ask him if he wants to do a three way.... just to see him huff up and act like he owns some of me. hahahhahahahhaha!

......... just saying.........
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